NUMBER 2 SO FONDLY REMEMBERED BY TEIGN VALLEY

TVH3 The Words for 30th May 2022 - Union Inn, Denbury - Number 2's Celebratory Hash appropriately laid by Poacher - Run No. 1919

 

HARES: Poacher with Soapy on rum stop duty

 

Who wuz there: Poacher, Soapy, Melonpicker, Palmolive, 'ello Vera, Wash 'n' Go, Capt Jack Sparrow, T-Humper, iPoo'd, Only Here for the Beer, Man-Pig, Arkangel, Cheerio Beerio, Hotlips, Zoot, Ernie, Beefy, Piltdown Man, Georgy Porgy, Big End, Well Hopped, Ned, Well Hopped's minis x2 (I don't think they've been named yet), Manopause, Wet-Johnny, Erection, Pork Torpedo, Horny, Deep Semen, Ablesemen, Slip-on-Me, Strap-On, Strap Dancer, Wide Receiver, Wetfart, Teapo, Threesum, and Coldtits.

 

The Circle

On the day that we celebrated Number 2's life, it was perfectly apt that the hare should be Poacher and that the location be Denbury. We all have our memories of Number 2. Small in stature huge in character. The life and soul of many a hash party not to mention the extravaganzas hosted at her riding school in Luton - always on the Saturday nearest the midsummer solstice. Bizarre, bonkers, and always fun, fun, fun.

 

Poacher's introduction to the trail was brief. There was a sweetie stop, there were two Long/Short splits and, "The first check is over there!".

 

The Trail by Palmolive

Run no.1919 Pub Union Inn at Denbury, 30th May Hare Poacher. Rum stop by Soapy.

The theme was Caribbean as it was a run to celebrate and remember No.2 who had a great love of Barbados and all the sun, sea, and rum that goes with it!

 

An excuse for fancy dress and bright colour outfits to be worn along with a smile. Earlier in the day, I was at mum's - Soapy, along with her Grandchildren Allo'Vera and Wash'n' Go having fun working out what to wear digging through bags of grass skirts and flower garlands, such fun as every time you put on a grass skirt it makes your hips gyrate!!!

 

We met on the green outside the pub, whilst the locals were busy putting up bunting to celebrate the Queens Platinum Jubilee, good timing as it made it even more of a party feel as the yummy rum stop was on the green beautifully decorated by Soapy and little assistant Wash 'n' Go.

 

Hashers joined in dribs and drabs ready for 7.15pm all admiring each other's fun costumes and outfits. Plenty of flower garlands and grass skirts! 

 

Shit Faced, looking awesome as Jack Sparrow and taking his role very seriously with his bottle of rum in hand and staggering around! Horny and Pork Torpedo also coming as pirates of the Caribbean and with great effort and to most male hashers delight no shorts under her very short skirt!!!

 

Poacher had laid the trail, some downpours during the day making it a little tricky but by the evening we were blessed with sunshine. 

 

An explanation of what we were doing, longs and shorts, and hands up for sausage and chips for when the pub opened. Then we were off. Teapot having the right idea at the first check, sit on the bench, and wait for the front runners to find it!

 

Through the village, getting funny looks and even waves from the windows from the locals, I think they wondered where the party was! We admired the decorations as we ran through Denbury, nearly every house having Union Jack flags out, one even seemed to have the Queen visiting I saw her at the window!

 

County Lanes, full of pretty dainty flowers and little false trails to keep us on our toes! But generally heading on up towards the downs, 

 

I did all the shorts on the run mostly chatting all the way and having a giggle every time we came to a stile or gate as for some reason Horny was asked to go over it first!!?

 

The views from the downs were a sight to behold. Such a still, clear evening you could see for miles, we should be grateful for every day we have on this beautiful Earth filled with our friends and family.

We had a sweetie stop at the top to help regroup, the longs were nowhere to be seen but I managed to resist eating their fill of the sweets!

 

We passed them as we were coming back down off the Downs, where Allo' Vera kindly put a weed over the initial cross so they'd know the route - this might come back to haunt her!

 

Looking online, it shows a Stravastrava run, I'm guessing this was mostly 'Longs' either that or I was intoxicated from the rum aroma from Shit Faced - I forgot where I was?!?!?

 

Back at the Green, we were greeted by the glorious rum stop! Rum punch and the scrummy rum cake was just as nice on my tea break at work the next day!!! Thanks, Soapy for the spread and decorations, just brilliant. 

 

Once all back and circled up, Manpig got down-downs underway, with songs from the Songmaster Pork Torpedo. My favourite song being the famer who has Tourette's!!!

 

Wet Fart got one for not saying Hi to I think Able when he was seen looking rather dapper in Teignmouth.

 

Able had a Birthday Down Down, all the right notes in the wrong order!

 

Beefy got one for being a FRB.

 

Allo'Vera had her first down-down for being mistakenly heard by Hot Lips that she'd weed on one of the marks! She was trying to be helpful! Good on you girl, a swift half-pint of water was gone in a second.

 

Soapy had to down-down as she wasn't sure how much rum to put in the rum punch - A LOT PLEASE!!

 

Lots of laughs and more giggles and Manpig said a few words and we raised a glass to No.2. What a strong woman she was who made a mark on so many people and was a great character and brought life to the party, she will really be missed. A true hasher.

 

The pub had kindly opened just for us, so bundled inside as the temperature started to dip, to get a pint and a fill of sausage and chips.

 

A great evening and a great trail. Thanks Poacher. On On to next week,

Palmolive. x

 

The Down-Downs as described by MP

Thank the pub for the beer....and for opening especially for us on a Monday night.

 

Thank Poacher for laying a lovely trail.

 

1st Down-Down: Slip-on-Me awards the birthday cake hat to Ablesemen as it was her "21st" birthday yesterday - all the right notes, although not necessarily in the right order.

 

2nd Down-Down: Able Semen awards the horned hat to Wetfart for ignoring pretty young women when walking straight past Able, without acknowledging her, in Newton Abbot. A note from our Songmeister, Pork Torpedo, "Old McDonald had terrets..."

 

3rd Down-Down: Erection gives Jester's hat to Beefy for FRB'ing. Although it could have been for carrying a pineapple (a real one) all around the trail. Another song from the Songmeister.

 

4th Down-Down: a spare down-down and there was a story of weed and grass on trail. Drug taking on the hash? And by one of our youngest harriets? Shirley not! A glass of water for 'ello Vera accompanied by "The Grand Old Duke of York....."

 

5th Down-Down: a final down-down appropriately given to Soapy, but not for her splendid fare, rum cake, Able's birthday cake, and the rum punch. It was for the manner in which the rum punch was prepared:

 

"Man-Pig. How much punch shall I make? Shall I make it strong or weak?"

 

"Hmmmm. Don't know. Let's see how many hashers turn up and concoct accordingly".

 

"That's a good idea. I have two big jugs!"

 

"Yes. And so you do!"

 

Immediately the Songmeister comes up with, "She's a little flat chested but she's alright..."

It's goodbye from Palmolive and goodbye from Man-Pig.

 

Next week

Heathfield Industrial estate from The Greater Horseshoe School. Details and a What3Words location will be on the Facebook page. Hare is Beefy.