KING BILLY

 Run #2106 Monday 8th December Circle up from the King William IV 45 Fore St, Totnes TQ9 5HN with hare Wet Johnny. Parking at Victoria car park (free from 6 pm) or nearby on the Plains.

 

TVH The Words

 

1st December 2025.

Words for Hash #2105,

Who was there:

Roger the Dodger, Well Hopped, Big End, Swinger, Forrest Stump, Wet Johnny, Bee Flicker, Piltdown Man, Georgie P'Orgy, Coldtits, SMEllie, Ernie, Man Pig , Warm Front, Psycho, and Beefy. In the pub were Wet Fart and Threesum.

The first day of December marks the start of meteorological winter. Night had fallen and, in so doing , had set a trend*. The scene, presented to Hashers as they arrived, was Bible black and washed down with a biblical amount of rain. This, made all the more chilly with a south-westerly breeze. The hum and rattle of early conversations, before the Circle, expressed much sympathy for Roger the Dodger as all had witnessed the day's precipitation and, probably, had inferred: "I'm glad it's not me."

Gradually, chariots were arriving: I saw Forrest, Wet Johnny and Bee Flicker arrive. Soon after, Piltdown Man was seen wandering around trying to collect names: a valiant effort on its own as it was raining quite hard still.

It became apparent that we needed to Circle. Beefy suggested we move out of the rear cp and Circled, instead, at the front of the pub so that we were in the relatively sheltered lee of the building.

The rain continued and, through it, came Warm Front and Psycho ruing, apparently, their combined resolve to venture out on such an evening. Warm Front had little to complain about: sporting, as she was, a brand new coat, hand-finished by Hermes Trismegistus himself judging by the way it shed drops of the persistent rain so readily.

Vice Grand Master, Forrest, called for a Circle to form and sixteen wet Hashers tried to ignore the even-more-rain and managed to look happy.

SMEllie asked for Hares for January because there aren't any. Man Pig asked for a volunteer to write the Words.

Over to the Hares. There is a long, a short and a walkers' Trail, marked on the right unless it had to be on the left. Dots and a lot of arrows were the marks and the idea of checks was abandoned as earlier marks had washed away.

There is a Sweetie Stop (hurrah!) which can be found by using the foot crossing on the main road by the car dealership.

So, we set off... in the rain.

The Pack set off up Bishop's Avenue and soon I found myself in the esteemed company of Psycho and Wet Johnny and so it remained. Bee Flicker and Warm Front were well ahead and stayed there.

Meanwhile, our trail took us to Fore Street and then onto Radway Hill. This gave onto Radway Street until we hit Old Walls Hill. Somewhere around here Wet Johnny mentioned that we were still going uphill. This fact had not escaped his companions. Nor had the fact that the rain had, at last, called off its assault.

We left Old Walls Hill and headed for Postman's Path which two thirds of us negotiated in an upright position. I saw *Wet Johnny's tumble in all its glory as I was at the back. He executed a tuck'n'roll and was straight back on his feet.

We left the path directed, by arrows and dots, first left, then right at the road junction then left again into Three Trees Lane- a very welcome downhill stretch of winding, leaf-strewn byway which took us to Humber Lane where an arrow (spotted only by Psycho) sent us left

towards Humber where another arrow directed us on past the brewery . Yet more arrows indicated our route along the road to a crossroads where we turned right and at the next crossroads we turned left. We joined Lindridge road and missed the next arrow which took the Trail down the steps.

We three continued on down Smith Hill, along Clanage Street and on to Fore Street. The other two thirds of us knew exactly where we were so, I was happily being guided by them to the Sweetie Stop.

And, what a Sweetie Stop it was! This was no carrier bag of Haribos hanging from a stick in the rain: no sir! Most of us are familiar with R.t.D's Sweetie Stops: always generous with much thought and effort put into presentation and execution. This was a scaled down version owing to the need to find a sheltered spot for it. It was, nonetheless, impressive. A great variety of sweets, crisps, mince pies and drinks (including Rum, of course!) was on offer on tables, under an illuminated shelter and guarded by a Robin. Gnorman the Gnome had the evening off which shame but quite understandable. See you next time, Gnorman!

When we got to the S/S, we saw Warm Front for the first time since leaving the pub. Bee Flicker had gone on but, *Warm Front was busy with the task of eating as much as possible. Then, she announced that she had fallen over on Trail and "landed on my beautiful face" as she put it. Sure enough, there was a graze on her right cheek bone. Not only that, there was a fresh rip in the new coat!

During our conversations at the S/S, we realised the nobody had seen Ernie and Man Pig. We hoped all was right with them and, after saluting Roger the Dodger, we made our way back to the On Down. Just as we were crossing the road the aforementioned Ernie and Man Pig hove into view. Happily we called "On On!" to each other and continued on our way. (*Ernie, it turns out, was the third faller On Trail).

At the pub cp Coldtits asked if anyone had seen SMEllie. We hadn't and Coldtits seemed a little concerned. SMEllie was certainly back before I went inside so, all was well there.

A bunch of happy Hashers populated the lounge area and Forrest donned his RA hat having doffed his Vice GM hat and we cheered for the Trail and thanked the Hare, and the Hash for the Beer. The Hares were called up so, there was a daddy/daughter Beer race as the first Down-down.

Forrest produced the Hashit Shirt (from his freezer, apparently) and handed it to Warm Front for her tumble.

One beer left. It went to Man Pig for preventing Forrest from awarding it to himself for forgetting to bring his running leg to the Hash. No doubt he will be kicking himself with it when he gets it back.

Well done Roger the Dodger and Well Hopped for a stirling effort.

On on until next week when we will be at the King Bill, Totnes with Wet Johnny. I believe it has been fifty three weeks since last we were there.

On on, Beefy.

COCKHAVEN ARMS

Run #2105 Monday 1st December Circle up 7:15 pm from the Cockhaven Arms, 16 Cockhaven Rd, Bishopsteignton, Teignmouth TQ14 9RF with hare Roger the Dodger. Previously, we have been requested to try and park in the back car park and not in front of the pub.

Run #2104 Eastcliff car park, Teignmouth

TVH The Words

Run #2104 Eastcliff car park, Teignmouth

OD The Crafty Badger

Hares: Piltdown and Georgy

 

Who wuz there (with thanks to MP)

Piltdown Man, Georgie Porgy, Pocket Rocket, Man-Pig, Beefy, Smellie, Coldtits, Beeflicker, Missing, Tongue & Groove, Smash, Miss Mash, Wet Johnny, Judge Mental, Roger the Dodger, Big End, Well Hopped, Melon Picker, Soapy, Strap-On, Deep Semen, Flowery Twats, Wetfart & Bobbiball

On a chilly november night, the hashers arrived at the car park and stood in a circle shivering in the cold, Tongue and Groove decided to form her own circle as her pup was sat frozen to the ground and wouldn't move.

The GM asked for silence but his chilling voice went unheard, a bit like Rose's at the end of the Titanic movie.

After everyone was welcomed, notices were asked for, Beeflicker asked for volunteers to be a santa and a train conductor at his grotto, to no avail.

Eventually, after being prompted, Man Pig asked for a volunteer for the words, and here we are.

Big End asked for food numbers for next week's hash. As we were almost like icicles , thankfully, the hare stepped in, 3 miles for the walkers, 4 for the shorts and 5 for the longs, followed by the co hares offer of a longer walk, or a shorter short with a longer short and an even longer walk and also a short long ending with a short short walkers, now we were all confused so 3 and on, that way....

We left the car park at the rear and headed into Eastcliff gardens, lots of checks and lack of flour kept everyone together from all 647263 routes we had laid for us. Upon exiting the park and going through back alleys, we came to Teignmouth road and crossed over, onto Alta Vista close, eventually turning right onto Oak Hill crossroads with Judgemental opting to turning right into someone's drive, this was the way from the the 40th anniversary hash.

At the check at the crossroads of Holcombe road, Beeflicker checked up hill with no marks to be found. Pursued by Manpig, Beefy went right finding lots of marks which Judgemental had stated were not there - time to go to specsavers my friend

A nice down hill past the Castle Inn to Hall Lane where we turned left and headed back to the Teignmouth road, crossing over and down Smugglers lane, and onto the SW coast path sea wall for a lovely run back to Teignmouth. Here we did a sharp right onto East cliff walk and on home to the car park.

I'm not sure where the shorts and walkers went but they did a lot of the long route enjoying the same wanders and wonders of the longs.

On to the Badger pub, or Beaver pub, I can't remember.

Downdowns were awarded to:

Piltdown man for promising 5 mile longs and delivering that to the dot and for blaming Georgie Porgy for not laying the false trails.

Roger the Dodger for ignoring all marks and doing their own trail after going wrong due to star gazing.

And to Judgemental for many misdemeanours which he hoped to evade.

A superb trail enjoyed by all, thank you.

On on to Cockhaven Arms in Bishopsteignton

Beeflicker

OFF TO DAWLISH

Run #2103 Monday 17th November Circle up 7:15 pm from Barton Hill car park, Dawlish EX7 9QF with hare Polyfella.

ON DOWN Brunswick Arms, 10 Brunswick Place, Dawlish EX7 9PB

 

 

TVH3 The Words for 10th November 2025

Run #2102 The Royal British Legion, Newton Abbot

HARES: Beeflicker & Pocket Rocket

 

Who wuz there: Beeflicker (Hare), Pocket Rocket (Co-Hare), Man-Pig, Forrest-Stump, Beefy, Piltdown-Man, Georgy Porgy, Coldtits, Smellie, Strap-On, Strap-Dancer, Broadshit, Polyfella, Well Hopped, Pinball, Slip-on-Me, Miss'ing, Smash, Miss Mash, Wetfart, Ablesemen & Threesum (pub only)

A lot of rain during the day, and a very recent hash in a similar location meant that there wasn’t a huge turn out for the Remembrance Day themed hash. 

 

We nearly didn’t make it – but Simba hadn’t been on a hash for three years, so he was keen to grab the opportunity of a rare Monday night at his mum’s, to join in the fun! Simba wasn’t the only returnee. We were all delighted to welcome back Broadshit after a long absence too. Hope to see more of you again now the 4am Tuesday mornings have ceased!

At the circle, Simba seemed perplexed by something – I asked what it was later and he said “why did the lady who thought Simba was an elephant have mud on her face?” I hadn’t a clue what he was talking about*. Only in hashing!

No announcements at the circle in Cricketfield car park – Beeflicker wasn’t certain on distances, or when the marks changed from the right to the left but ah well, off we went in the direction of Warf Road.

An early series of checks, kept us together – the red chalk being often hard to spot in the dark. The FRBs led us down a few dark alleys, before we finally picked up the trail and headed for the Town Quay. Once there we were called over the bridge by MissIn and into the Hackney Marsh Nature Reserve.

At this point, Simba and I, along with Forrest, Strap On and Broadshit waved goodbye to the FRBs. We didn’t see them again, until the path towards the Passage House Inn, where there was some confusion over that vital ‘three and on’ mark. Luckily, Beeflicker was dutifully sweeping from behind so we knew where to go, and that was “on, on” along the path to the pub.

Just after the pub was the first l/s split. “Can we go long?” Simba hopefully asked. “No chance!” was my reply. I was already struggling to keep up with his youthful gallop. We ran on towards Greenhill Way – only to hit the main road and see no marks. Forrest’s dog wasn’t running well so he opted to take a route back along the main road to the OH. Simba and I searched on desperately for marks, and then Strap On joined us.

Eventually, retracing our steps we found the first of many marks on the left. Strap On thought this might be the returning trail for the longs but I had recalled the comments in the circle about some marks being on the left. So with Simba ahead, we made our way through Saxon Way, and popped out by the Wear Barton roundabout.

A clear arrow took us over the road and I saw a mark on the left at Longford Lane. Down the lane we went for some time – no marks. So we crossed over to the right and went back – no marks.

By this point, Strap On was with us again and spotted what looked to be a rogue red line of chalk in a cul de sac. But it led to a dead end. Now we were really confused! Knowing the route as I did, I had a feeling the Longs would be coming down Coombesend Road and joining where we were currently standing in confusion.

We decided to head back to the arrow and lo and behold, there was a mark on the right this time!

At this point, we were joined by the FRBs, and we followed them on through a maze of back streets in old Kingsteignton village, before popping out by the Range. It was then a long flat slog towards the Fire Station Roundabout.

Now Simba had found his rhythm with Man Pig and was off. I could just about make out his reflective jacket ahead so I knew he was okay. Another l/s split separated them, with the longs taking a footpath on the right and us shorts heading back through town to the OH.

I eventually caught up with Simba back at the car park entrance, where he was patiently waiting for me. We didn’t stay for the OD as it was a school night for Simba, but we really enjoyed the trail.

Thank you Beeflicker and Pocket Rocket for your efforts!

*it turns out the lady Simba was referring to was Slip-on-me, and she had been dressed in military fancy dress, hence the ‘mud’ on her face!

ON ON, Well Hopped x

Man-Pig has kindly sent in the DD's from the British Legion:

DD's: The Hare wasn't drinking and there was only one award present. This was the Hashshit shirt that had been awarded to Pork Torpedo the previous week and Porky had given it to Beefy to bring along to the Hash.

Beefy didn't have a story but Beeflicker did. The story was that a returnee had obviously become a little rusty in Hash protocols during his 18 month absence. Our returnee had pitched up with his rechargeable torch which hadn't been recharged in 18 months. The result was dim and dimmer as the trail progressed.

Being in a quasi military establishment, the RA recited an oft quoted mantra from the NCO's, "Prior planning prevents piss poor performance". Hence a note for the 5 P's (even though it is, in fact, 6 P's!). Bizarrely, just as we started singing the volume was turned up on the Royal British Legion's stereo.

No more awards but Beeflicker had another story. Towards the end of the trail, Miss'ing asked the Hare if the trail would follow the Teign and part of Archangel's trail from a fortnight ago. It dfid not but, as a bit of a spoof, the Hare marked a special trail for "Miss'ing". Miss'ing wasn't fooled for long and returned to the correct trail without losing too much time. Not so Polyfella & Beefy. they had a jolly good jaunt, following absolutely no marks at all, almost up to Teigngrace. No wonder they were last back.

Polyfella didn't fancy another beer as he was drinking so Beefy dispatched it pretty swiftly accompanied by "Here's to the Miss'ing one".

Next there was a DD to the most appropriately dressed Hasher given the fact that this was posted as the Remembrance Day Hash. Most Hashers sported poppies, either on trail or in the pub.

Beeficker was pretty much in head-to-toe DPM but was upstaged by a convincing commando resplendent with face camo-facepaint - namely Slip-on-Me. A note for "Go commando".

The final half went to the RA for what reason I do not know; nominal returnee or forgetfulness (the Pig couldn't remember which pub he was in). Nevertheless, Beefy came up with "Hold it in your hand Mrs Murphy".

Next week's Hash is in Dawlish with Polyfella as Hare. There are road closures so Polyfella will post something on the FB page by way of directional assistance.

Thank you, Well Hopped and MP

MONDAY 10TH NOVEMBER #2102

Run #2102 Monday 10th November REMEMBRANCE DAY THEME. Circle up 7:15 pm from Cricketfield Road Car Park, Newton bbot TQ12 2AS with Beeflicker and Pocket Rocket. On Down The Royal British Legion club, 2 Marsh Rd, Newton Abbot TQ12 2AP

 

TVH WORDS Run #2101

 

Tinkley Bottom with Hares Forrest, Woodlend and Tongue ‘n’ Groove

 

We formed a lopsided oval; half inside and half outside a hastily erected gazebo. SMellie announced next week’s hash in Newton Abbot, and long-absent Jon was welcomed back after having being coaxed out to join us by the promise of fireworks and stew. No more announcements so over to the hares. There was something about river crossings, and a toll to the ferryman…or something, and off we set. I wasn’t worrying about river crossings after the first 50m as my shoes were already soaked from the long grass.

 

We ran down alongside the Teign and somehow ended up on the main road. Then up a very long hill with the bright lights of Hennock twinkling above us. I followed the first long and the calls of the FRBs; Beefy, Beeflicker and Woodlend who was re-marking the trail as he went. We were guided through a farmyard, a barn, and rejoined the shorts on the final pull up towards Hennock. The shorts were flummoxed after all ways appeared to be dead ends, but then there was an “on on” from Soapy further up the hill. Pork Torpedo had missed that the marks had changed from flour to sawdust. Another long-short split but this time I opted short as Jon was flagging and the bonfire was calling. It was all downhill and back through Trucker’s field. I’d expected the promised river crossing but it turns out that Forrest hadn’t been convinced of our swimming abilities and so we were directed over the bridge and back to his abode mostly dry from the knees up.

 

Once everyone was safely back (including Psycho and Pisswell who had almost ended up in Bovey) the bonfire was ‘seeded’ and lit. Whumpf! Sparklers were distributed and the stew dished up. Somehow it was even tastier than last year’s.

 

Awards were given to Hornie for an inelegant gate crossing and potential volvo damage and Pork Torpedo for being up Cold Tits’ and Smellie’s rear. Then it was finally time for Sam to be named; down on your knees! There were a few suggestions which were met with tumbleweed but the suggestion of Tongue ‘n’ Groove was met with a cheer of approval. So the last down-downs went to the triple act of Tongue ‘n’ Groove, Forrest and Woodlend.

 

The evening was topped off with a fantastic birthday cake made by Able for Forrest’s birthday, and a firework display. What a night!!

 

On on to next week at The British Legion, Newton Abbot

 

Warmfront x 

FORREST'S FIREWORK FRENZY AND FEASTING

 

Run #2101 Monday 3rd November Circle up 7:15 pm from Forrest's hideout at Tinkley Bottom, Trusham, Newton Abbot TQ13 0NT deep in the home of hashing, the Teign Valley.

what3words: princely.screeches.dissolve

 

Yes, Oh Dearly Deafened, it is that time of year again for Forrest's Firework Frenzy and associated feasting.

 

The mad maestro adds: Bonfire, road kill stew and beer. BYO drink, plate, cutlery and, don't forget to bring a firework or two and some cash - as cash is king at Tinkley!

TVH WORDS for #2100

Monday 28th October

Maltings Taphouse, Newton Abbot

Hare: Archangel

 

A grand dimpsy evening to circle up outside the Tap House where a large enthusiastic bunch of hashers gathered. Lots of people were there including a lady hasher from 'the original TVH3 (Tamar valley).

A hash-off commenced between WetFart and said lady, concluding they had both been round a lot of trails. 

 

Some hashers came along as fat pumpkins, and others were somehow rocking the Ghouly look.

Archangel wobbled his skeleton face eyes at us, and I got the gist - longs head ye off that way. 

 

Whereupon, shorts and walkers went left and trundled about getting lost. Longs went right and swept up the stragglers on both sides of a chalk roundabout, all of us crossing the little bridge to run along the Teign towards Kingsteignton. 

 

A nice soft trail but at least we were not ankle deep in water, like around two years back. 

 

We all followed the trail past B&Q into the canal area, passing witches concocting new potions, then the longs were sent on a good time-wasty HAHA which left us way behind the shorts. This was further compounded by an accidental detour to check if the hospital was still there. 

 

We sped on over 'virgin territory' as flooding from past years had smashed some of the paths about and we slipped through the clay en route to Teigngrace, shorts going left of the water with the longs to the right. 

 

I found myself alone on trail for a while, tootling through the woods and I thought about Halloween and all those witches around and about. I recalled some of the serial killer films I'd been watching at home, and I quickened my pace. 

 

Eventually, I rejoined some other hashers who I thought were being very casual about the marks, I called them on until I realised I was off-trail and, apologising to them, we all got back on-trail again.

It was ankle twisting territory over the fields, then a lovely lollop back through trees and along the new canal pathways, finally legging it back to the Taphouse for a great beer or a delicious fruit sour. 

 

Downdowns went to the best Witches, Soapy and Horny, and, of course, the Hare. 

 

Great to see everybody, and a fab trail, thank you, Archangel, really appreciated.

 

ON-ON to next Monday with Forrest at Tinkley Bottom

 

Psycho