BACK TO THE LEGION

 

Run #2043 Monday 30th September Circle up 7:15 pm from the Royal British Legion club, Newton Abbot, 2 Marsh Rd, Newton Abbot TQ12 2AP with hare Beeflicker.

Parking nearby at Cricketfield Road car park.

 

 

BEEFY TO THE RESCUE

 An impromptu poem sent in by Beefy:

The sky of solid grey

Rain was seen all day

But Hashers made their way

Through the leafy lanes of Tottiford

One two three, On on!

 

Hares had broken heart

Washed out from the start

Again to put the mark

Along the Trails of Tottiford

One two three, On on!

 

Through the night we stole

Walkers took a stroll

Around the watery bowl

Along the stony paths of Tottiford

One two three, On on!

 

From a check we fly

A cross found, by and by

Have another try

Along the rooty paths of Tottiford

One two three, On on!

 

Running through the bogs

Ducking under logs

Scaring all the frogs

Along the muddy paths of Tottiford

One two three, On on!

 

Warm Front up ahead

Legs are feeling dead

Try again instead

On the up hill paths of Tottiford

One two three, On on!

 

Hunt the Hares and chase them down

Along the rocky roads of Tottiford

One two three, On on!

 

Many miles of ground, then

Lit up all around

The Beer stop was found

From the shiggy paths of Tottiford

One two three, On on! 

 

Bar of curious style

Hashers with a smile

Laughter all the while

Off the lane near Tottiford

One two three On on! 

 

Virgins, were we troubling?

No, their hearts were bubbling!

Efforts were redoubling

Round the lanes of Tottiford

One two three On on! 

 

Beer to make you stay

Shots were cleared away

Before we made our way

Along the lanes near Tottiford

One two three, On on!

No words as yet this week

Most unfortunately, Man-Pig was unable to make the hash as he was recovering from his efforts in the Salcombe marathon over the weekend. 

Forrest may still provide some words which will then be posted here. This is the penalty for relying on one person. 

Years ago, you may recall, we had a weekly rota which ultimatrely failed as hashers seemed unable to fill their slots. 

'Could do better' would be on their school reports!

BACK TO THE RESERVOIRS

Run #2042 Monday 23rd September Circle up from Tottiford Reservoir CP with Beeflicker & Psycho.

 W3W: ranks.serenade.surprise

 

OD Cromwell Arms, Bovey Tracey. Pre order chips/ cheesy chips in circle. Kitchen closes 8.30.

 

 

ETHEREAL, EERIE & A STEP BACK IN TIME

TVH3 The Words for 16th September 2024 

 

Beefy's, Widecombe-in-the-Moor 

 

Run No. 2041 Birthday Hash

 

HARE: Beefy

 

 

Who wuz there: Beefy, Man-Pig, Beeflicker, Peter, Forrest, Piltdown Man, Georgy Porgy, Threesum, Coldtits, Satnav, Roger the Dodger, Big End, Well Hopped, Ned, Psycho, Warm Front, Slip-on-Me, Fukarewe, Wet Johnny, Manopause, Pork Torpedo, Homie, Melon Picker & Soapy

 

Pre-Circle

Pre-circle it appeared that Fukarewe and Man-Pig were the only ones who had read Beefy's instructions for parking at his pad i.e. there's precious little parking at the Beefy residence so park in Widecombe and car share. Fukarewe and Man-Pig did just that but no other Hashers ventured into the car park.

"Oh well. It's only half a mile. We'll walk"

 

And so we did; only to be passed by Piltdown-Man & Georgy Porgy, Big End & Well Hopped and Strap-On & Strap Dancer - none of who stopped to offer us a lift. The list of candidates for tonight's Down-Downs had already commenced.

 

Circle

There is something special, almost magical about running at this time of year. The trail starts in daylight and finishes in pitch black. At the start of the Circle, the supermoon was just beginning to peep over the top of the hills surrounding Widecombe-in-the Moor. By the time Beefy had finished his brief, the whole moon was visible

 

Beefy had laid on food, beer and a scrummy home-made chocolate cake.

"Two pounds in the pot please for beer", a bargain!

There were Longs', Shorts' and Walkers' trails. The Shorts' and the Walkers' trail would have quite a lot of road. Not so the case with the Longs' trail.

 

Trail

To say that Beefy's house is on the edge of the moor would be an understatement. We exited out of Beefy's back gate straight onto the moor heading for Wind Tor where the Walkers would part company with both the Longs and the Shorts. 

 

The beauty of the moor is hard to put into words. Behind us the full(ish) moon was now clear of the hills, resplendent for all to see. Whilst in front of us was the spectacular red sky of the setting sun. We're truly blessed and we'd barely run 400 yards.

 

The Topiary Twins were FRB'ing with Beeflicker and a fit Wet-Johnny close behind. Then it was Man-Pig, Manopause and Fukarewe taking a more sedate pace followed by Big End and Well Hopped.

Heading northwest we crossed a small road that forms part of the Two Moors way and the first of the Long/Short splits. I think that this might be where we lost Manopause. Then it was downhill towards a disused quarry. 

 

This part of the trail reminded me a little of Beefy's St George's day trail, but on a reciprocal bearing. In the distance, I could just make out the Topiary Twins; it was already torch time. 

 

Another road crossing and another Long/Short split near Rowden Cross. The Longs carried straight over and and then down to a five-bar gate at the end of a track. Warmfront was incorrectly checking northwest whilst Psycho did no checking at all. A hapless Warmfront returned and, so, down the track it was and onto a road and another Long/Short split. I think that this is where we lost Fukarewe.

 

The sole FRB's now comprised Warmfront, Psycho, Beeflicker, Wet-Johnny, Big End, Well Hopped and a trailing Man-Pig who had stopped to get his torch out. 

 

The trail now went down a steep lane towards East Shallowford. Warmfront checked out the first public footpath to our left - BONG! wrong. The second public footpath to our left was more successful.

Here the public footpath follows the east bank of the West Webburn River. However, the ferns were so high that you only needed to be ten feet from the river (more of a brook really) and you wouldn't know it was there. A loose shoelace meant that I was now probably some fifty metres behind the FRB's....I wouldn't see them again until we were back at Beefy's.

 

The jungle warfare cadre continued until we eventually came to a tiny conurbation and a fishhook! No, it wasn't a fishhook, it was a mark for a tight right hand turn, almost coming back on yourself. 

 

Running between the old houses in the dark was like taking a step back in time....rather Dickensian, also somewhat calm and tranquil after a couple of very minor off trail excursions amongst the ferns.

 

There was also a sense of deja due. For some reason I thought of the Mill House that we'd passed on one of Pisswell's great trails from a couple of years ago. Unbeknown to me, until looking at the OS map whilst writing The Words, I was only a few feet from the Mill House at Jordan. 

 

Down some stone steps, over a planked footbridge and cross over to the west bank of the river. Sharp left, through a gate and into woodland. It was absolutely pitch black. 

 

By torchlight, the boughs of the trees made me think that I was in a haunted wood. I was sure that I would see torchlight of the FRB's but nothing.....no, wait, something. There was definitely torchlight ahead. A detour around a couple of fallen trees and I caught up with Coldtits.

 

"Have the FRB's come past you?"

"Yes. Ages ago".

How have I become so slow I pondered?

 

Pushing on. A pedestrian gate. More haunted woods, or should that be enchanting? Certainly, there was something about being out on my own in this environment that was both peaceful and challenging. I don't know why I thought there was anything challenging about the trail. It was excellently marked. It was a warm evening and the scenery, both by day and night was....well....intoxicating.

 

Out of the woods now and a short length of track. On the right were large granite flagstones. On the left tractor ruts on the broader part of the track. I definitely recognised this part of the trail but it had been daylight the last time that I'd been on it. A five bar gate, left and back on tarmac for the first time in ages. For some reason, the twightlight runs always seem longer than they really are. Maybe it's because in the summer you can see exactly where you are and where you're likely to be going. Whereas in the dark, your only sense of reference is the torch beam ahead of you. This was neither one nor the other. In fact, a little disorientating....but a pleasant change none the less.

 

"SS". Had the Germans invaded since the Circle? No. It was the sweetie stop. Half a dozen chocolate covered raisins later I was climbing the steep incline from Ponsworthy up to Lizwell. Torchlight ahead. It had to be a Hasher....and one with a dog. I recognise that silhouette. It's Perry. Soon I was in conversation with Forrest-Stump. The air was warm. Such a change from last week. Forrest commented on how lucky we were to live in this part of the world and what a spectacular trail it had been. I concurred.

 

Sometimes its good to run alone. No distractions and time to take in the beauty, both far and near and both imposed upon you within minutes at this time of year as the extensive views afforded atop Wind Tor reduce to a mere 25 foot torch beam in the woods that straddle the river. Another backmarker. We'd caught up with Peter. His shinsplints were playing up again.

 

The last Long/Short split to our right.

"I can't be arsed", I thought. Besides, I was enjoying the conversation with Forrest and catching up with the latest from the Edwards family.

In next to no time we were back at Beefy's.

I can't thank Beefy enough for this trail. Ethereal, tranquil, a step back in time and, when off trail, a tad eerie. So many emotions.....run! What run?

 

Down-Downs

This was likely to be Forest-Stump's last trail for a while as he is co-producing this year's Dunsford pantomime. "Oh no he isn't". Hence Forrest RA's.

 

The first order of service is to thank the Hare for a beautiful trail and for his hospitality. It is also his birthday on Wednesday when he will be laying the Devon Lunatics Hash trail. We have the Songmeister present so it is not all the right notes but, not necessarily, in the right order. it is: S.H.I..Y.T.R.A.I.L.

 

Fukarewe has the Jester's hat. Despite the plethora of culprits that overtook Fukarewe walking to the On-Down and failed to offer a lift, the hat goes to Psycho. Why? Because, on the way to Hash, Fukawe had to stop in a lay-by and have a look under his bonnet. Psycho simply glided past and waved. "Hold it in your hand Mrs Murphy".

 

The Jester's Hat is the only award present. Slip-on-Me was wearing the Hashshit shirt but she's already gone home so are there any stories? Yes. Poor Forrest fell over on trail. However, he was helped to his feet by a Samaritan that goes by the name of Wet-Johnny. Now safely bipedal, Forrest waves Wet-Johnny on his way only to see him fall flat on his arse. Pork Torpedo strums up with, "You're stupid.You're stupid....and something about the proximity of cum and Mums.

 

What goes around comes around. For every taker there is also a giver. Fukarewe has already given the Jester's Hat away but he now finds himself back in the Circle. It transpires that he has pulled over to the side of the road because he has run out of petrol! "He's the meanest......."

 

Watching all this from afar is Pisswell. She is in Central Park, New York but not having a beer as the Americans have banned drinking in public spaces. The wonder of modern technology.

 

A fantastic evening Beefy. Thankyou for everything and enjoy your birthday.

 

Next week

Next week's Hash is from Tottiford reservoir. Our Hare is Beeflicker and it is a fancy dress run.

 

On-On to next week. MP

LISTEN CAREFULLY!

Run #2041 Monday 16th September

Beefy's Birthday Hash

 

 

7:15 pm Circle up from Church Cottages, Widecombe in the Moor, Newton Abbot TQ13 7TH

W3W ordeals.harmless.dolphin

Bring cash for drinks

Changing facilities available in the house.

PLEASE NOTE

Parking: is limited so, it would be good if solo drivers can pick up others en route or, meet others at Widecombe CP and share a lift to the Circle.

If you bring a dog, it will need to be left in your car after the Trail as the garden is not secure and the house is a "cat house".

Church Cottages is only half a mile from Widecombe. I will endeavour to meet you all in order to guide parking. There will a short walk hence to a terrace of four houses at a right angle to the road. Walk past all four houses and down the side of the last house to the back garden.

You are welcome to change, afterwards, in the bathroom or in the shower room.

Food is (a variety of) pizza and some sort of cake, all of which is free. Beers are provided for a CASH only donation.

On on, Beefy

TVH3 The Words for 9th September 2024

Manaton Church car park

Run No. 2040

 

HARE: Poacher

 

 

 

Who wuz there: Poacher, Shitfaced, Man-Pig, Archangel, Beefy, Beeflicker, Runner Bean, Peter, Piltdown Man, Georgy Porgy, Smellie, Ablesemen, Coldtits, Roger the Dodger, Big End, Well Hopped, Ned, Psycho, Satnav, Polyfella and Fukarewe

 

Circle

The Circle got underway after some initial confusion as to the run number. Shitfaced welcomed all to run no. 2037 whilst Man-Pig corrected him stating that it was, in fact, 2040. Smellie checked her phone.

"It's 2037".

"No it isn't. We count the three runs from the 40th weekend," asserts the Pig.

"Sunday's run was by City of Exeter", says Shitfaced.

"By invitation courtesy of TVH3".

"It's getting dark. Hurry up!" interjects Archangel.

So over to Smellie for the current state of Hare Raizing in TVH3.

"We're full to the end of the year. If you want to lay next year, see me!"

Over to the Hare.

 

The only information that Poacher imparted was that there were a lot of fields with livestock in so dogs on leads please....glaring at Slip-on-Me.

"My dog's a good dog".

It wouldn't be too long before we could put that to the test.....eh Big End?

"Check it out".

 

Trail

It's been a long time since we last ran from here, and it really is a lovely spot. I think that we were last here two years ago when Pisswell had us all in the village hall drinking out of cardboard sample receptacles. Although I think that one or two of the Walkers made it down to the Kestor Inn for a swifter.

 

Prior to that was four years ago. Again on a Poacher trail with a Hare that was nowhere to be seen at the Circle and a half laid nine-and-a half mile trail. What would our veteran Hare have in store for us this evening? Hopefully not another 9.5 miles!

 

Rocket scientist, Runner Bean, and his brother, Peter, were the FRB's and checking out the public footpath that runs through the graveyard. Slip-on-Me's untethered mutt was checking out the graves and experienced hashers were gazing at the check on the road outside the church.

 

As soon as you leave the back of the graveyard there is a choice of footpath. Straight on was being checked out by Runner Bean and to the right Beeflicker was looking for that elusive third dot of flour, "Always on the right" according to Poacher.....except when it's in the middle as it turned out.

 

"On back" calls Poacher to Runner Bean as the rest of the pack now followed Beeflicker up to Manaton Rocks for a lovely 360 degree view of the surrounding countryside, including Haytor and Saddletor silhouetted against the dimming sky. I think all made it to the top of Manaton Rocks before we were back on trail. 

 

Initially, there was a steep descent over a slippery rocky footpath to the first of two Long/Short splits. This was really for the Walkers who would have a short trip back to the cars. For the Longs, more slippery rocky footpath and then across an open field and onto road at Langstone. 

 

Runner Bean was well put of sight. Psycho and Beeflicker had checked out in the wrong direction and were now running past us just as we reached the road. And they kept on running, past the kicked out check at Neadon.

 

Man-Pig, Big End and Fukarewe followed the kicked-out check in the correct direction towards Foxworthy Bridge, eventually catching up with Beefy at another check. The Pig checked right...and wrong!

 

The trail followed a broad concrete farm track downhill before another check just above the river had us bear right and into Neadon Cleeve. 

 

At the next check and it was right and up a steep incline and over two fallen trees, one of which had been chainsawed in half to keep the path open. I recognised this as being part of March's (pre-Grizzly A2B). Up and up we went eventually levelling off.

 

At Horsham we were back on a wide track and running through a pair of wrought iron gates. It looked like there must be a big old house somewhere nearby but we never saw it. 

 

At a 90 degree bend, Poacher was remarking the second Long/Short split. Fukarewe was in two minds about going Long when Poacher simply said.

"You're doing it".

And so he did.

 

Runner Bean, Beeflicker, Pycho and Beefy must have been well ahead, leaving Man-Pig, Big End, Fukarewe as tailenders on the Long - or so we thought, and with Poacher sweeping. Unbeknown to us, someone was still behind us. Any guesses as to who this might be?

 

The Shorts followed a path that was pretty much a bee-line straight back to the car park. The Longs headed southeast through Letchole Plantation until a back-check had us into woodland for a short while before entering the northern edge of Manaton (actually called "Water" on the OS map) and joining the road back to the car park just north of the pub. Big End and I found a single dot and then, 300 yards later the "OH" sign for the final leg upto the car park.

 

A vey picturesque and enjoyable 3.6 miles. Thankyou Poacher......and no-one had got lost - or had they?

 

Down-Downs

No Forrest-Stump. He must be rehearsing for the Dunsford pantomime...."Oh no he isn't". Hence the Pig RA's.

 

It has been a long, long time since TVH3 were officially at the Kestor Inn as the On-Down. Four years according to Poacher and that was on the occasion of his 9.5 mile epic.

 

Gradually the pub began to fill up with eaters devouring their choice of chips or cheesy chips......whenever someone mentions Cheesy Chips I always think of Rambo. His staple hash diet I think. Georgy is anxiously looking at her phone.

"What's up?"

"Smellie's not back".

"Is she on the Shorts or the Longs?"

"Longs. But it's alright. I've told her to turn left at the main road and to come straight to the pub rather than all the way back to the car park", which is exactly 0.4 of a mile away according to Piltdown Man.

Beefy and I look at each other.

"I bet she ends up at the car park", stated Thomas Aquinas.

"No", says the Jack of Hearts - Beefy.

"A fiver on it"

"Done"

Ten minutes later Smellie arrives - unflustered.

"Have you done the Longs?"

"Yes".

"Bugger. You've cost me money"

A fiver changes hands and Smellie looks perplexed but says nothing.

 

Sometime later, in conversation, it transpires that Smellie did go back to the car park. Money changes hands again. Smellie is none the wiser.

 

The Kestor Inn made us most welcome. The pub had cooked surplus chips and these were passed round. We also had a staggering 7 half pints of ale provided by the pub. It was good to be back. Yes indeedee. But how on earth were we going to generate seven stories of dubious authenticity? But, where there's a will, there's a way.

"Do we have any awards?"

Beefy actually has two awards, the Jester's Hat and the Checking Chicken Hat. The checking Chicken Hat is put to one side for a later award whilst Beefy looks for a suitable victim.....errr.....deserving recipient.

The hat goes to Fukarewe. But, what for? For revealing his bank transactions over the Hash weekend a whole list of £4.60 debits; the cost of a single pint of ale at Teignmouth RFC. Clearly he hasn't been buying any rounds! A note for, "He's the meanest, he sucks......"

 

Next up is Big End with the Hashshit shirt. This goes straight to Slip-on-Me. What for? Because, within 60 seconds of starting the trail, her "good dog" is unleashed and running around the graveyard. "Here's to the dog trainer...."

 

Shitfaced adopts the Checking Chicken hat and awards it to Smellie. Yes, she was last back....again. But this was for a pre-trail misdemeanour. Shitfaced and Smellie were in conversation just before she ran off saying:

"I've got to go dogging!"

What she actually said was, " I have to lock the dog in" (the car). Not good enough. "Here's to the dogger".

Ablesemen has a story. Someone was very late getting to the Hash and did his own trail, didn't they Polyfella? "Here's to the late one...."

 

It is also someone's birthday tomorrow. And that person is......the Hare. Poacher has arranged the Down-Downs but has forgotten to arrange for one of those DD's to be a cider. He decides to down half of his own pint of cider to the accompaniment of all the right notes, but not necessarily in the right order.

 

One of our young athletes is leaving us to go north and start work......as a ROCKET SCIENTIST. True story. Runner Bean is joining a team in Elgin (north Scotland) who are working on a commercial rocket that will put payloads into orbit. Additionally, this rocket will be launched from the UK. It has re-usable booster stages that parachute back to earth and it runs on liquid bio-propanol and liquid oxygen. Best of all, Elgin actually has a hash. All the very best to you on you new, high flying, position. A note for, "The Rocket Scientist", what else?

 

Finally, there are two Hashers that have nothing better to do in their lives than arrive at the Hash half an hour early. This is definitely a first for Archangel. Maybe he's setting a good example for Psycho who was also ridiculously early. Fortunately, there are two beers left. "Get a life.get a life, life,life etc"

And so concluded the Down-Downs. A "thankyou" to Poacher for a lovely twighlight trail and a very big "thankyou" to the Kestor Inn for making us so welcome upon our long awaited return.

 

Next week

Next week's Hash is from Beefy's residence on the outskirts of Widecombe-in-the-Moor. It is his birthday Hash. Parking is a little tight so please consider parking in Widecombe car park and car sharing from there........ oh, definitely bring your torches.

 

On-On to next week. MP

PLEASE NOTE this is a venue change from the posted words (now amended)

Run #2040 Monday 9th September Circle up 7:15 pm from the Church car park at Manaton.ON DOWN from the Kestor Inn TQ13 9UF with Poacher.

Chips/cheesy chips - show of hands at circle.

 

 

TVH3 The Words for 2nd September 2024

Tinpickle & Rhum, Moorland Hotel, Haytor

Run No. 2039

 

HARE: Slip-on-Me

 

 

 

Who wuz there: Slip-on-Me, Shitfaced, Man-Pig, Forrest-Stump, Perry, Archangel, Beefy, Pisswell, Beeflicker, Able Semen, Wetfart, Runner Bean, Smellie, Coldtits, Poacher, U-Bend, Big End, Well Hopped, Ned, Psycho, Warmfront, Johnny, Red Rum, Melonpicker, Soapy, Justin, Dylan, Wide Receiver, Cheesy Nipples, Cheesy Helmet (pub only I think) and virgin Harry - Pisswell's son

 

Circle

It was one day after the TVH3 40th anniversary away weekend. How many would turn up? A very respectable 27 as it turned out. Slip-on-Me was delighted with the turnout, especially as the weather forecast had been on the damp side. Even more incredulous give the state of some Hashers sore heads the previous morning.

 

Shitfaced welcomed all into the Circle and immediately observed an unfamiliar face....Harry. Harry is a virgin and also Pisswell's son. There is an absence of flour in the Circle but the Hare scoots off and comes back with some sawdust to anoint Harry's trainers with.

 

Smellie has no announcements about Hare Raising. Shitfaced is just about to hand the Circle over to the Hare when Man-Pig butts in.

 

"Can I have a volunteer for The Words for the anniversary weekend? Runs 2036, 2037 & 2038."

Forrest is volunteered as he was the ring leader behind Saturday's post disco shot-fest.

So over to the Hare.

 

"The trail is laid in an assortment of materials, none of them flour - mainly sawdust. It is not very long; Longs' 3 ,miles, Shorts' 2 miles and Walkers' 1 mile", all much to the delight of the still fragile competitors in the shots competition.

 

"Does anyone know why the bar is called the Tinpickle & Rhum?"

 

Nobody knows except Wide Receiver. Apparently the "Tinpickle & Rhum" sign over the entrance to the bar was found in the loft of the hotel and the name stuck.

Finally:

"There is a pickle and rum stop at the quarry".

 

Trail

What could possibly go wrong on a 3 mile Hash?

 

We were directed out of the lower entrance to the hotel car park for our first challenge. Searching for a mark....any sort of mark. Wide receiver went downhill towards Pinchaford. Poacher headed for the granite railway track and everyone else congregated around the small green with the telephone kiosk.

After a while Poacher alleged that he was "On" and we followed him across the road, onto the moor and along the granite tramway.

 

In the distance to our left, we could see the distinct shape of Slip-on-Me's Landrover climbing up towards the quarry.....at least we knew where we were going to end up.

 

As we moved along the tramway, we came to several spots which would have been ideal places to put a check or a Long/Short split. Eventually, we came to a fork in the tramway. This was a perfect spot for a split. After a lot of searching, we found an "S" and an arrow pointing downhill. 

 

The Longs carried on straight ahead only to find a cross..... perplexing as the only other obvious route was an even shorter track that leads directly up to the quarry. Poacher back-checked towards Smallacombe Rocks. Wide Receiver also back-checked on a minor track that led up to the quarry. Most Hashers were still running back from the cross. Where was the Longs' trail? 

 

We had Hashers speed out all over the moor. Eventually, we gave up on searching for the elusive Long and embarked on the Short. This was basically due west down and then up to Holwell Tor. 

 

We then headed for Emsworthy Rocks before running out of marks again. From on-high atop Haytor, Wide Receiver and Slip-on-Me were shouting directions to befuddled and bamboozled Hashers.

 

We all made our way across country and through a ravine that formed part of an area of quarried stone at the end of one of the tramline's spurs. I was following Big End and Well Hopped as we climbed out of the narrow gulley and onto open ground between Haytor and Emsworthy Rocks. It was only ten past eight but is was getting very dipsy indeed but, fortunately, dry. Somehow, by the time that I skirted around to the south side of Haytor, I'd lost sight of Big End and Well Hopped and, indeed, every other Hasher. 

 

With the broad open lawn down to Haytor middle car park I commenced my run home

 but........something's missing - and it's not just other Hashers. Half way down, the penny dropped - THE BEER STOP; well, pickles and rum stop.

 

U-turn. Back up towards Haytor and look for the broadest track to my right. I found a narrow track and headed northeast. After only a couple of hundred yards, I spied the distinct shape of a Landrover roof and a solitary Hasher. It was Red Rum who was about to make her way back to the hotel. She advised that everyone else was in the quarry.

 

"Hey presto!", the drink stop was ahead of me including all of the other Hashers except for Poacher and Archangel. And what a drink stop it was. A flavoured rum, pickles comprising red cabbage, beetroot and green chillies, homemade bread, cheese and biscuits and some sweet biscuits with a whortleberry base.....delicious.

 

It was dark now. This week most Hashers had remembered to bring torches. The final leg was shared with Pisswell and Forrest Stump descending down the vehicular track from the quarry to the road and then the final 300 yards back to the hotel.

 

Down-Downs

Forrest-Stump had drawn the short straw and was RA'ing.

 

The drink stop had been excellent. The absence of marks had given us all a a giggle rather than a headache and the tot of rum was just enough to clear the vestiges of the weekend's hangover. Hence the first Down-Down goes to the Hare for her excellent refreshment stop.

 

"Do we have any awards?"

 

Red Rum has the Hashshit shirt and a simple story. Someone had mentioned that they only come to the Hash for the beer and not the run. Amazingly, this was not Only Here for the Beer. It was Big End. "Hold it in you hand Mrs Murphy".

 

Next we had the Wet Johnny doppelgänger up and I didn't know what for....impersonating Wet-Johnny? No, it was apparently for forgetting to pay his pound. Anyway, Johnny gets a beer and a note to, "Here's to non-Wet-Johnny....." and also gets the Checking Chicken Hat.

 

The final half pint of ale and the final award. Pisswell has the Jester's hat and, despite fierce competition, Beefy gets it for being the most drunk of the weekend. This included making a mess of Pisswell's van. Beefy tried to palm this off on Smellie alleging that Smellie had been very much looking forward to Beefy's trail the previous week. But this was when it had been scheduled for Staverton Beer Festival. However, last week's trail had to be relocated to Trendlebere down where Smellie failed to make an appearance. She had, however, made it to the beer festival on Sunday afternoon so the wandering half pint of ale found itself back in Beefy's hands. A note for the "inebriated one" or some such similar moniker.

 

Just before we left, we thanked the pub for having us just before we risked being thrown out. Beeflicker had found a pair of lady's trainers on trail and Forrest was determined to auction them off in a bid to get the weekend's collection for the "Pete's Dragons" mental health charity up to £600. He banged his hand on the table so hard, to mark the end of the auction, that he sent Warmfront's beer glass flying which smashed on the stone floor!

 

.....and there concludeth the Hash.

 

Next week -NOTE change of venue

Next week's Hash is from the Church CP at Manaton OD Kestor Inn with Poacher haring. Bring your torches.

 

On-On to next week. MP