Who wuz there? -See below for circle up.
Our
GM welcomed virgin Tim, and new comers Yip Yap and Soggy Jeans from the lunatics away weekend.
Announcements were that Beefy had fed the cat!
Pisswell introduced Farmer Frank and farmers wife Sue. She took everyone down to the yard to show the old longhouse, where cattle and people slept either side of the main entrance corridor to the building. Pizwell is an ancient Duchy tenement, mentioned in the Doomsday book and owned by the Duke of Cornwall (currently Prince William) and where Pisswell was brought up. The dead from the ancient tenaments, often as far as Widecombe, were carried by foot, over the moor to Bellever and then on to Lydford to be buried. Hence, the Lych way, and many coffin stones for resting on the journey.
Here endeth the history lesson, but building the eerie atmosphere, or should I say Ernie atmosphere?The hare was in fact buying time for the late arrival of Ernie. (big cheer when he arrived!) Is he the “ fastest” milk man in the west? Perhaps not, but unknown to the hare, Coldtits and SMEllie were also on the way. Cheesy nipples and Cheesy Helmet left their Pizwell burger duties to rush them both to catch up by landrover. Thank you to them both or we’d have been scuppered and 2, 4, and 6m trail could have been much more! ( think it already was).
The trail: (bet you known this tune?)
Farmer Frank, he had a farm E-I-E-I-O.
And on that farm they had a hash, On-on-on-and-on
With a Beefy here, and a Pisswell there.
Here’s Forrest, there’s Manpig, Beeflicker and Strap on
With G’Orgy here and Piltdown there, here’s Soapy, Melon Picker, everywhere is Pyscho!
Pocket Rocket here, Ernie there, (just), Palmolive, Virgin Tim, everywhere is Yip Yap!
Soggy Jeans here, Horny there, Pork torpedo, Manpig, everywhere is SMellie
Cheesy nipples here, Cheesy Helmet there, Warmfront, Coldtits, everywhere is Basecamp.
Threesum here, Miss Inn there, Miss Inn child, Manpig, that’s enough, now Cheerio
They circled up to hear the hare, go On-on-on-and-on!
Farmer Frank, he had a farm, E-I-E-I-O.
He rounded us up past the barns E-I-E-I-O.
The tractor that he sat upon,
Pulled the trailer we were on.
For grim death, we all hung on, On-and -on-and-on
We checked the stock through Pizwell’s paths. E-I-E-I-O.
Sheep and cows and ponies passed E-I-E-I-O.
Top of the hill, the longs jumped down. “They’re off trail”, so homeward bound.
Back to running on the ground, On-on-on-and-on.
Others off above Dury, On-on-on-and-on.
To Ridden ridge they all journeyed, On-on-on-and-on.
Walkers split right, View point delight,
Snailey house we’ll all have sight.
Where, oh where, were all those longs? On-on-on-and-on.
Farmer Frank he raced longs home, E-I-E-I-O.
Hare had told them where to go, On-on-on-and-on.
They crossed the river, up the track
Running to rejoin the pack.
over Cator Common there, On-on-on-and-on.
On they ran to Riddon ridge On-on-on-and-on.
Crossed the river, not the bridge,
On and on and on.
Up over Ridge and join the rest…
Laughter stepping stones are best!
Cross the Dart by Laughter hole, On-on-on-ha-ha!
Laughter Hole was once a farm, E-I-E-I-O.
Long abandoned, peace and calm, On-on-on-and-on.
Through steep woods of Bellever,
Crossing stones to witches lair
Snaily house and all their fare
from the witches there
Time to swim here if you’re hot, On-on-on-and-on.
Here’s the chance for Snaily stop, On-on-on-and-on.
Then like the clappers you can run
Your hash is very nearly done
Back to Pizwell, for more fun, On-on-on-and-on.
Pizwell burgers made for you, Pizwell beef, yum, yum.
And there’s beer to drink there too, or cider, let’s have some.
With a bottle here and a burger there,
Here’s some sauce, Onions please
coming from the pair with cheese!
Then Teign valley had down downs, at Pizwell, down, down, down
Out takes:
Shorts were happy running off trail over Riddon ridge but eventually led back by Melon Picker, who remembered why we were all there!
The first swimming hole was bravely entered by Mitch. Or is that gladly? Funny no other takers!
Virgin Tim made a great FRB. I hope he will be back again soon.
The Longs negiotiated large rocks, laid that afternoon, and obscuring the trail laid over Cator common.
Apologies for the ankle breaking terrain, before crossing the river at Pizwell bridge.
Walkers flip flopped their way (well one of them) down a very steep hill to the river. Well done walkers. However, it didn’t begin to compare with the longs and shorts, who negotiated 3 or 4 river crossings and the near vertical slope of Hamlyns tor! (See tors of Dartmoor map)Hares advice at the circle was something like…..Close your eyes, sit down, cross your legs and try not to woo-oosh it yourselves!
A quick wash off at the sweety snail stop, although all gone for latecomers! River was not so deep as the hare remembered in her childhood, so a few bruises sustained i believe!
The back to Pizwell bit was confused by memories of double headed arrows! It all made sense when the hare said it, her reasons so that the walkers realised they had a dead end at the VP and had to return. Not really sure what everyone else was thinking but some went back for more snails!
Down downs:
RA was Forrest, with a selection of filthy songs from our songmeister PorkTorpedo. It’s always great to improve the quality of our singing!
An award from Pocket Rocket to Forrest for losing his glasses 3 times. Didn’t know he had!
The jesters hat to Ernie for being late and nearly upsetting the hay cart! (now he’ll have to come again!)
Pork Torpedo for falling over. Again, didn’t know he had! I knew Forrest had and that Yip Yap and Beefy had fallen in the river!
And then Horny for her big birthday on Sunday. All the right words and notes but not necessarily in the right order!
And lastly, a down down to farmer Frank for reckless driving over the bumpy field and to say thank you for hosting us at Pizwell. If you liked the beef, contact pizwellfarm@hotmail.co.uk
And last words from the hare……
Thank you so much for coming out such a long way and for being brave enough to do some pretty hard core terrain and take a swim in the river. Apologies for bruises, tics and lack of snails! Thanks to the cheesy couple, perfect on burger duty. X Thanks to Basecamp and Miss Inn for forgetting their names!
And thanks all for a really fun evening. ( I think we were all grateful to have survived!)
Next week: on on to next week at Bonehill rocks, Widecombe, with Poacher. On down the Rugglestone.