Friday 27 September 2024
BEEFY TO THE RESCUE
An impromptu poem sent in by Beefy:
The sky of solid grey
Rain was seen all day
But Hashers made their way
Through the leafy lanes of Tottiford
One two three, On on!
Washed out from the start
Again to put the mark
Along the Trails of Tottiford
One two three, On on!
Through the night we stole
Walkers took a stroll
Around the watery bowl
Along the stony paths of Tottiford
One two three, On on!
From a check we fly
A cross found, by and by
Have another try
Along the rooty paths of Tottiford
One two three, On on!
Running through the bogs
Ducking under logs
Scaring all the frogs
Along the muddy paths of Tottiford
One two three, On on!
Warm Front up ahead
Legs are feeling dead
Try again instead
On the up hill paths of Tottiford
One two three, On on!
Hunt the Hares and chase them down
Along the rocky roads of Tottiford
One two three, On on!
Many miles of ground, then
Lit up all around
The Beer stop was found
From the shiggy paths of Tottiford
One two three, On on!
Bar of curious style
Hashers with a smile
Laughter all the while
Off the lane near Tottiford
One two three On on!
Virgins, were we troubling?
No, their hearts were bubbling!
Efforts were redoubling
Round the lanes of Tottiford
One two three On on!
Beer to make you stay
Shots were cleared away
Before we made our way
Along the lanes near Tottiford
One two three, On on!
No words as yet this week
Most unfortunately, Man-Pig was unable to make the hash as he was recovering from his efforts in the Salcombe marathon over the weekend.
Forrest may still provide some words which will then be posted here. This is the penalty for relying on one person.
Years ago, you may recall, we had a weekly rota which ultimatrely failed as hashers seemed unable to fill their slots.
'Could do better' would be on their school reports!
Saturday 21 September 2024
BACK TO THE RESERVOIRS
Run #2042 Monday 23rd September Circle up from Tottiford Reservoir CP with Beeflicker & Psycho.
ETHEREAL, EERIE & A STEP BACK IN TIME
TVH3 The Words for 16th September 2024
Beefy's, Widecombe-in-the-Moor
Run No. 2041 Birthday Hash
HARE: Beefy
Who
wuz there: Beefy, Man-Pig, Beeflicker, Peter, Forrest, Piltdown Man,
Georgy Porgy, Threesum, Coldtits, Satnav, Roger the Dodger, Big End,
Well Hopped, Ned, Psycho, Warm Front, Slip-on-Me, Fukarewe, Wet Johnny,
Manopause, Pork Torpedo, Homie, Melon Picker & Soapy
Pre-Circle
Pre-circle
it appeared that Fukarewe and Man-Pig were the only ones who had read
Beefy's instructions for parking at his pad i.e. there's precious
little parking at the Beefy residence so park in Widecombe and car
share. Fukarewe and Man-Pig did just that but no other Hashers ventured
into the car park.
"Oh well. It's only half a mile. We'll walk"
And
so we did; only to be passed by Piltdown-Man & Georgy Porgy, Big
End & Well Hopped and Strap-On & Strap Dancer - none of who
stopped to offer us a lift. The list of candidates for tonight's
Down-Downs had already commenced.
Circle
There
is something special, almost magical about running at this time of
year. The trail starts in daylight and finishes in pitch black. At the
start of the Circle, the supermoon was just beginning to peep over the
top of the hills surrounding Widecombe-in-the Moor. By the time Beefy
had finished his brief, the whole moon was visible
Beefy had laid on food, beer and a scrummy home-made chocolate cake.
"Two pounds in the pot please for beer", a bargain!
There
were Longs', Shorts' and Walkers' trails. The Shorts' and the Walkers'
trail would have quite a lot of road. Not so the case with the Longs'
trail.
Trail
To
say that Beefy's house is on the edge of the moor would be an
understatement. We exited out of Beefy's back gate straight onto the
moor heading for Wind Tor where the Walkers would part company with both
the Longs and the Shorts.
The
beauty of the moor is hard to put into words. Behind us the full(ish)
moon was now clear of the hills, resplendent for all to see. Whilst in
front of us was the spectacular red sky of the setting sun. We're truly
blessed and we'd barely run 400 yards.
The
Topiary Twins were FRB'ing with Beeflicker and a fit Wet-Johnny close
behind. Then it was Man-Pig, Manopause and Fukarewe taking a more
sedate pace followed by Big End and Well Hopped.
Heading
northwest we crossed a small road that forms part of the Two Moors way
and the first of the Long/Short splits. I think that this might be
where we lost Manopause. Then it was downhill towards a disused quarry.
This
part of the trail reminded me a little of Beefy's St George's day
trail, but on a reciprocal bearing. In the distance, I could just make
out the Topiary Twins; it was already torch time.
Another
road crossing and another Long/Short split near Rowden Cross. The
Longs carried straight over and and then down to a five-bar gate at the
end of a track. Warmfront was incorrectly checking northwest whilst
Psycho did no checking at all. A hapless Warmfront returned and, so,
down the track it was and onto a road and another Long/Short split. I
think that this is where we lost Fukarewe.
The
sole FRB's now comprised Warmfront, Psycho, Beeflicker, Wet-Johnny,
Big End, Well Hopped and a trailing Man-Pig who had stopped to get his
torch out.
The
trail now went down a steep lane towards East Shallowford. Warmfront
checked out the first public footpath to our left - BONG! wrong. The
second public footpath to our left was more successful.
Here
the public footpath follows the east bank of the West Webburn River.
However, the ferns were so high that you only needed to be ten feet
from the river (more of a brook really) and you wouldn't know it was
there. A loose shoelace meant that I was now probably some fifty metres
behind the FRB's....I wouldn't see them again until we were back at
Beefy's.
The
jungle warfare cadre continued until we eventually came to a tiny
conurbation and a fishhook! No, it wasn't a fishhook, it was a mark for
a tight right hand turn, almost coming back on yourself.
Running
between the old houses in the dark was like taking a step back in
time....rather Dickensian, also somewhat calm and tranquil after a
couple of very minor off trail excursions amongst the ferns.
There
was also a sense of deja due. For some reason I thought of the Mill
House that we'd passed on one of Pisswell's great trails from a couple
of years ago. Unbeknown to me, until looking at the OS map whilst
writing The Words, I was only a few feet from the Mill House at Jordan.
Down
some stone steps, over a planked footbridge and cross over to the west
bank of the river. Sharp left, through a gate and into woodland. It
was absolutely pitch black.
By
torchlight, the boughs of the trees made me think that I was in a
haunted wood. I was sure that I would see torchlight of the FRB's but
nothing.....no, wait, something. There was definitely torchlight ahead.
A detour around a couple of fallen trees and I caught up with
Coldtits.
"Have the FRB's come past you?"
"Yes. Ages ago".
How have I become so slow I pondered?
Pushing
on. A pedestrian gate. More haunted woods, or should that be
enchanting? Certainly, there was something about being out on my own in
this environment that was both peaceful and challenging. I don't know
why I thought there was anything challenging about the trail. It was
excellently marked. It was a warm evening and the scenery, both by day
and night was....well....intoxicating.
Out
of the woods now and a short length of track. On the right were large
granite flagstones. On the left tractor ruts on the broader part of the
track. I definitely recognised this part of the trail but it had been
daylight the last time that I'd been on it. A five bar gate, left and
back on tarmac for the first time in ages. For some reason, the
twightlight runs always seem longer than they really are. Maybe it's
because in the summer you can see exactly where you are and where you're
likely to be going. Whereas in the dark, your only sense of reference
is the torch beam ahead of you. This was neither one nor the other. In
fact, a little disorientating....but a pleasant change none the less.
"SS".
Had the Germans invaded since the Circle? No. It was the sweetie stop.
Half a dozen chocolate covered raisins later I was climbing the steep
incline from Ponsworthy up to Lizwell. Torchlight ahead. It had to be a
Hasher....and one with a dog. I recognise that silhouette. It's Perry.
Soon I was in conversation with Forrest-Stump. The air was warm. Such a
change from last week. Forrest commented on how lucky we were to live
in this part of the world and what a spectacular trail it had been. I
concurred.
Sometimes
its good to run alone. No distractions and time to take in the beauty,
both far and near and both imposed upon you within minutes at this
time of year as the extensive views afforded atop Wind Tor reduce to a
mere 25 foot torch beam in the woods that straddle the river. Another
backmarker. We'd caught up with Peter. His shinsplints were playing up
again.
The last Long/Short split to our right.
"I
can't be arsed", I thought. Besides, I was enjoying the conversation
with Forrest and catching up with the latest from the Edwards family.
In next to no time we were back at Beefy's.
I
can't thank Beefy enough for this trail. Ethereal, tranquil, a step
back in time and, when off trail, a tad eerie. So many emotions.....run!
What run?
Down-Downs
This
was likely to be Forest-Stump's last trail for a while as he is
co-producing this year's Dunsford pantomime. "Oh no he isn't". Hence
Forrest RA's.
The
first order of service is to thank the Hare for a beautiful trail and
for his hospitality. It is also his birthday on Wednesday when he will
be laying the Devon Lunatics Hash trail. We have the Songmeister
present so it is not all the right notes but, not necessarily, in the
right order. it is: S.H.I..Y.T.R.A.I.L.
Fukarewe
has the Jester's hat. Despite the plethora of culprits that overtook
Fukarewe walking to the On-Down and failed to offer a lift, the hat goes
to Psycho. Why? Because, on the way to Hash, Fukawe had to stop in a
lay-by and have a look under his bonnet. Psycho simply glided past and
waved. "Hold it in your hand Mrs Murphy".
The
Jester's Hat is the only award present. Slip-on-Me was wearing the
Hashshit shirt but she's already gone home so are there any stories?
Yes. Poor Forrest fell over on trail. However, he was helped to his feet
by a Samaritan that goes by the name of Wet-Johnny. Now safely
bipedal, Forrest waves Wet-Johnny on his way only to see him fall flat
on his arse. Pork Torpedo strums up with, "You're stupid.You're
stupid....and something about the proximity of cum and Mums.
What
goes around comes around. For every taker there is also a giver.
Fukarewe has already given the Jester's Hat away but he now finds
himself back in the Circle. It transpires that he has pulled over to the
side of the road because he has run out of petrol! "He's the
meanest......."
Watching
all this from afar is Pisswell. She is in Central Park, New York but
not having a beer as the Americans have banned drinking in public
spaces. The wonder of modern technology.
A fantastic evening Beefy. Thankyou for everything and enjoy your birthday.
Next week
Next week's Hash is from Tottiford reservoir. Our Hare is Beeflicker and it is a fancy dress run.
On-On to next week. MP
Saturday 14 September 2024
LISTEN CAREFULLY!
Run #2041 Monday 16th September
Beefy's Birthday Hash
7:15 pm Circle up from Church Cottages, Widecombe in the Moor, Newton Abbot TQ13 7TH
W3W ordeals.harmless.dolphin
Bring cash for drinks
Changing facilities available in the house.
PLEASE NOTE
Parking:
is limited so, it would be good if solo drivers can pick up others en
route or, meet others at Widecombe CP and share a lift to the Circle.
If you bring a dog, it will need to be left in your car after the Trail as the garden is not secure and the house is a "cat house".
Church
Cottages is only half a mile from Widecombe. I will endeavour to meet
you all in order to guide parking. There will a short walk hence to a
terrace of four houses at a right angle to the road. Walk past all four
houses and down the side of the last house to the back garden.
You are welcome to change, afterwards, in the bathroom or in the shower room.
Food is (a variety of) pizza and some sort of cake, all of which is free. Beers are provided for a CASH only donation.
On on, Beefy
TVH3 The Words for 9th September 2024
Manaton Church car park
Run No. 2040
HARE: Poacher
Who
wuz there: Poacher, Shitfaced, Man-Pig, Archangel, Beefy, Beeflicker,
Runner Bean, Peter, Piltdown Man, Georgy Porgy, Smellie, Ablesemen,
Coldtits, Roger the Dodger, Big End, Well Hopped, Ned, Psycho, Satnav,
Polyfella and Fukarewe
Circle
The
Circle got underway after some initial confusion as to the run number.
Shitfaced welcomed all to run no. 2037 whilst Man-Pig corrected him
stating that it was, in fact, 2040. Smellie checked her phone.
"It's 2037".
"No it isn't. We count the three runs from the 40th weekend," asserts the Pig.
"Sunday's run was by City of Exeter", says Shitfaced.
"By invitation courtesy of TVH3".
"It's getting dark. Hurry up!" interjects Archangel.
So over to Smellie for the current state of Hare Raizing in TVH3.
"We're full to the end of the year. If you want to lay next year, see me!"
Over to the Hare.
The
only information that Poacher imparted was that there were a lot of
fields with livestock in so dogs on leads please....glaring at
Slip-on-Me.
"My dog's a good dog".
It wouldn't be too long before we could put that to the test.....eh Big End?
"Check it out".
Trail
It's
been a long time since we last ran from here, and it really is a
lovely spot. I think that we were last here two years ago when Pisswell
had us all in the village hall drinking out of cardboard sample
receptacles. Although I think that one or two of the Walkers made it
down to the Kestor Inn for a swifter.
Prior
to that was four years ago. Again on a Poacher trail with a Hare that
was nowhere to be seen at the Circle and a half laid nine-and-a half
mile trail. What would our veteran Hare have in store for us this
evening? Hopefully not another 9.5 miles!
Rocket
scientist, Runner Bean, and his brother, Peter, were the FRB's and
checking out the public footpath that runs through the graveyard.
Slip-on-Me's untethered mutt was checking out the graves and experienced
hashers were gazing at the check on the road outside the church.
As
soon as you leave the back of the graveyard there is a choice of
footpath. Straight on was being checked out by Runner Bean and to the
right Beeflicker was looking for that elusive third dot of flour,
"Always on the right" according to Poacher.....except when it's in the
middle as it turned out.
"On
back" calls Poacher to Runner Bean as the rest of the pack now
followed Beeflicker up to Manaton Rocks for a lovely 360 degree view of
the surrounding countryside, including Haytor and Saddletor
silhouetted against the dimming sky. I think all made it to the top of
Manaton Rocks before we were back on trail.
Initially,
there was a steep descent over a slippery rocky footpath to the first
of two Long/Short splits. This was really for the Walkers who would
have a short trip back to the cars. For the Longs, more slippery rocky
footpath and then across an open field and onto road at Langstone.
Runner
Bean was well put of sight. Psycho and Beeflicker had checked out in
the wrong direction and were now running past us just as we reached the
road. And they kept on running, past the kicked out check at Neadon.
Man-Pig,
Big End and Fukarewe followed the kicked-out check in the correct
direction towards Foxworthy Bridge, eventually catching up with Beefy at
another check. The Pig checked right...and wrong!
The
trail followed a broad concrete farm track downhill before another
check just above the river had us bear right and into Neadon Cleeve.
At
the next check and it was right and up a steep incline and over two
fallen trees, one of which had been chainsawed in half to keep the path
open. I recognised this as being part of March's (pre-Grizzly A2B). Up
and up we went eventually levelling off.
At
Horsham we were back on a wide track and running through a pair of
wrought iron gates. It looked like there must be a big old house
somewhere nearby but we never saw it.
At
a 90 degree bend, Poacher was remarking the second Long/Short split.
Fukarewe was in two minds about going Long when Poacher simply said.
"You're doing it".
And so he did.
Runner
Bean, Beeflicker, Pycho and Beefy must have been well ahead, leaving
Man-Pig, Big End, Fukarewe as tailenders on the Long - or so we
thought, and with Poacher sweeping. Unbeknown to us, someone was still
behind us. Any guesses as to who this might be?
The
Shorts followed a path that was pretty much a bee-line straight back
to the car park. The Longs headed southeast through Letchole Plantation
until a back-check had us into woodland for a short while before
entering the northern edge of Manaton (actually called "Water" on the OS
map) and joining the road back to the car park just north of the pub.
Big End and I found a single dot and then, 300 yards later the "OH"
sign for the final leg upto the car park.
A vey picturesque and enjoyable 3.6 miles. Thankyou Poacher......and no-one had got lost - or had they?
Down-Downs
No Forrest-Stump. He must be rehearsing for the Dunsford pantomime...."Oh no he isn't". Hence the Pig RA's.
It
has been a long, long time since TVH3 were officially at the Kestor
Inn as the On-Down. Four years according to Poacher and that was on the
occasion of his 9.5 mile epic.
Gradually
the pub began to fill up with eaters devouring their choice of chips
or cheesy chips......whenever someone mentions Cheesy Chips I always
think of Rambo. His staple hash diet I think. Georgy is anxiously
looking at her phone.
"What's up?"
"Smellie's not back".
"Is she on the Shorts or the Longs?"
"Longs.
But it's alright. I've told her to turn left at the main road and to
come straight to the pub rather than all the way back to the car park",
which is exactly 0.4 of a mile away according to Piltdown Man.
Beefy and I look at each other.
"I bet she ends up at the car park", stated Thomas Aquinas.
"No", says the Jack of Hearts - Beefy.
"A fiver on it"
"Done"
Ten minutes later Smellie arrives - unflustered.
"Have you done the Longs?"
"Yes".
"Bugger. You've cost me money"
A fiver changes hands and Smellie looks perplexed but says nothing.
Sometime
later, in conversation, it transpires that Smellie did go back to the
car park. Money changes hands again. Smellie is none the wiser.
The
Kestor Inn made us most welcome. The pub had cooked surplus chips and
these were passed round. We also had a staggering 7 half pints of ale
provided by the pub. It was good to be back. Yes indeedee. But how on
earth were we going to generate seven stories of dubious authenticity?
But, where there's a will, there's a way.
"Do we have any awards?"
Beefy
actually has two awards, the Jester's Hat and the Checking Chicken
Hat. The checking Chicken Hat is put to one side for a later award
whilst Beefy looks for a suitable victim.....errr.....deserving
recipient.
The
hat goes to Fukarewe. But, what for? For revealing his bank
transactions over the Hash weekend a whole list of £4.60 debits; the
cost of a single pint of ale at Teignmouth RFC. Clearly he hasn't been
buying any rounds! A note for, "He's the meanest, he sucks......"
Next
up is Big End with the Hashshit shirt. This goes straight to
Slip-on-Me. What for? Because, within 60 seconds of starting the trail,
her "good dog" is unleashed and running around the graveyard. "Here's
to the dog trainer...."
Shitfaced
adopts the Checking Chicken hat and awards it to Smellie. Yes, she was
last back....again. But this was for a pre-trail misdemeanour.
Shitfaced and Smellie were in conversation just before she ran off
saying:
"I've got to go dogging!"
What she actually said was, " I have to lock the dog in" (the car). Not good enough. "Here's to the dogger".
Ablesemen
has a story. Someone was very late getting to the Hash and did his own
trail, didn't they Polyfella? "Here's to the late one...."
It
is also someone's birthday tomorrow. And that person is......the Hare.
Poacher has arranged the Down-Downs but has forgotten to arrange for
one of those DD's to be a cider. He decides to down half of his own pint
of cider to the accompaniment of all the right notes, but not
necessarily in the right order.
One
of our young athletes is leaving us to go north and start work......as
a ROCKET SCIENTIST. True story. Runner Bean is joining a team in Elgin
(north Scotland) who are working on a commercial rocket that will put
payloads into orbit. Additionally, this rocket will be launched from
the UK. It has re-usable booster stages that parachute back to earth
and it runs on liquid bio-propanol and liquid oxygen. Best of all,
Elgin actually has a hash. All the very best to you on you new, high flying, position. A note for, "The Rocket Scientist", what else?
Finally,
there are two Hashers that have nothing better to do in their lives
than arrive at the Hash half an hour early. This is definitely a first
for Archangel. Maybe he's setting a good example for Psycho who was also
ridiculously early. Fortunately, there are two beers left. "Get a
life.get a life, life,life etc"
And
so concluded the Down-Downs. A "thankyou" to Poacher for a lovely
twighlight trail and a very big "thankyou" to the Kestor Inn for making
us so welcome upon our long awaited return.
Next week
Next
week's Hash is from Beefy's residence on the outskirts of
Widecombe-in-the-Moor. It is his birthday Hash. Parking is a little
tight so please consider parking in Widecombe car park and car sharing
from there........ oh, definitely bring your torches.
On-On to next week. MP
Friday 6 September 2024
PLEASE NOTE this is a venue change from the posted words (now amended)
Run #2040 Monday 9th September Circle up 7:15 pm from the Church car park at Manaton.ON DOWN from the Kestor Inn TQ13 9UF with Poacher.
Chips/cheesy chips - show of hands at circle.
TVH3 The Words for 2nd September 2024
Tinpickle & Rhum, Moorland Hotel, Haytor
Run No. 2039
HARE: Slip-on-Me
Who
wuz there: Slip-on-Me, Shitfaced, Man-Pig, Forrest-Stump, Perry,
Archangel, Beefy, Pisswell, Beeflicker, Able Semen, Wetfart, Runner
Bean, Smellie, Coldtits, Poacher, U-Bend, Big End, Well Hopped, Ned,
Psycho, Warmfront, Johnny, Red Rum, Melonpicker, Soapy, Justin, Dylan,
Wide Receiver, Cheesy Nipples, Cheesy Helmet (pub only I think) and
virgin Harry - Pisswell's son
Circle
It
was one day after the TVH3 40th anniversary away weekend. How many
would turn up? A very respectable 27 as it turned out. Slip-on-Me was
delighted with the turnout, especially as the weather forecast had been
on the damp side. Even more incredulous give the state of some Hashers
sore heads the previous morning.
Shitfaced
welcomed all into the Circle and immediately observed an unfamiliar
face....Harry. Harry is a virgin and also Pisswell's son. There is an
absence of flour in the Circle but the Hare scoots off and comes back
with some sawdust to anoint Harry's trainers with.
Smellie
has no announcements about Hare Raising. Shitfaced is just about to
hand the Circle over to the Hare when Man-Pig butts in.
"Can I have a volunteer for The Words for the anniversary weekend? Runs 2036, 2037 & 2038."
Forrest is volunteered as he was the ring leader behind Saturday's post disco shot-fest.
So over to the Hare.
"The
trail is laid in an assortment of materials, none of them flour -
mainly sawdust. It is not very long; Longs' 3 ,miles, Shorts' 2 miles
and Walkers' 1 mile", all much to the delight of the still fragile
competitors in the shots competition.
"Does anyone know why the bar is called the Tinpickle & Rhum?"
Nobody
knows except Wide Receiver. Apparently the "Tinpickle & Rhum" sign
over the entrance to the bar was found in the loft of the hotel and
the name stuck.
Finally:
"There is a pickle and rum stop at the quarry".
Trail
What could possibly go wrong on a 3 mile Hash?
We
were directed out of the lower entrance to the hotel car park for our
first challenge. Searching for a mark....any sort of mark. Wide
receiver went downhill towards Pinchaford. Poacher headed for the
granite railway track and everyone else congregated around the small
green with the telephone kiosk.
After a while Poacher alleged that he was "On" and we followed him across the road, onto the moor and along the granite tramway.
In
the distance to our left, we could see the distinct shape of
Slip-on-Me's Landrover climbing up towards the quarry.....at least we
knew where we were going to end up.
As
we moved along the tramway, we came to several spots which would have
been ideal places to put a check or a Long/Short split. Eventually, we
came to a fork in the tramway. This was a perfect spot for a split.
After a lot of searching, we found an "S" and an arrow pointing
downhill.
The
Longs carried on straight ahead only to find a cross..... perplexing
as the only other obvious route was an even shorter track that leads
directly up to the quarry. Poacher back-checked towards Smallacombe
Rocks. Wide Receiver also back-checked on a minor track that led up to
the quarry. Most Hashers were still running back from the cross. Where
was the Longs' trail?
We
had Hashers speed out all over the moor. Eventually, we gave up on
searching for the elusive Long and embarked on the Short. This was
basically due west down and then up to Holwell Tor.
We
then headed for Emsworthy Rocks before running out of marks again.
From on-high atop Haytor, Wide Receiver and Slip-on-Me were shouting
directions to befuddled and bamboozled Hashers.
We
all made our way across country and through a ravine that formed part
of an area of quarried stone at the end of one of the tramline's spurs.
I was following Big End and Well Hopped as we climbed out of the
narrow gulley and onto open ground between Haytor and Emsworthy Rocks.
It was only ten past eight but is was getting very dipsy indeed but,
fortunately, dry. Somehow, by the time that I skirted around to the
south side of Haytor, I'd lost sight of Big End and Well Hopped and,
indeed, every other Hasher.
With
the broad open lawn down to Haytor middle car park I commenced my run
home
but........something's missing - and it's not just other Hashers.
Half way down, the penny dropped - THE BEER STOP; well, pickles and rum
stop.
U-turn.
Back up towards Haytor and look for the broadest track to my right. I
found a narrow track and headed northeast. After only a couple of
hundred yards, I spied the distinct shape of a Landrover roof and a
solitary Hasher. It was Red Rum who was about to make her way back to
the hotel. She advised that everyone else was in the quarry.
"Hey
presto!", the drink stop was ahead of me including all of the other
Hashers except for Poacher and Archangel. And what a drink stop it was. A
flavoured rum, pickles comprising red cabbage, beetroot and green
chillies, homemade bread, cheese and biscuits and some sweet biscuits
with a whortleberry base.....delicious.
It
was dark now. This week most Hashers had remembered to bring torches.
The final leg was shared with Pisswell and Forrest Stump descending
down the vehicular track from the quarry to the road and then the final
300 yards back to the hotel.
Down-Downs
Forrest-Stump had drawn the short straw and was RA'ing.
The
drink stop had been excellent. The absence of marks had given us all a
a giggle rather than a headache and the tot of rum was just enough to
clear the vestiges of the weekend's hangover. Hence the first Down-Down
goes to the Hare for her excellent refreshment stop.
"Do we have any awards?"
Red
Rum has the Hashshit shirt and a simple story. Someone had mentioned
that they only come to the Hash for the beer and not the run. Amazingly,
this was not Only Here for the Beer. It was Big End. "Hold it in you
hand Mrs Murphy".
Next
we had the Wet Johnny doppelgänger up and I didn't know what
for....impersonating Wet-Johnny? No, it was apparently for forgetting to
pay his pound. Anyway, Johnny gets a beer and a note to, "Here's to
non-Wet-Johnny....." and also gets the Checking Chicken Hat.
The
final half pint of ale and the final award. Pisswell has the Jester's
hat and, despite fierce competition, Beefy gets it for being the most
drunk of the weekend. This included making a mess of Pisswell's van.
Beefy tried to palm this off on Smellie alleging that Smellie had been
very much looking forward to Beefy's trail the previous week. But this
was when it had been scheduled for Staverton Beer Festival. However,
last week's trail had to be relocated to Trendlebere down where Smellie
failed to make an appearance. She had, however, made it to the beer
festival on Sunday afternoon so the wandering half pint of ale found
itself back in Beefy's hands. A note for the "inebriated one" or some
such similar moniker.
Just
before we left, we thanked the pub for having us just before we risked
being thrown out. Beeflicker had found a pair of lady's trainers on
trail and Forrest was determined to auction them off in a bid to get
the weekend's collection for the "Pete's Dragons" mental health charity
up to £600. He banged his hand on the table so hard, to mark the end
of the auction, that he sent Warmfront's beer glass flying which
smashed on the stone floor!
.....and there concludeth the Hash.
Next week -NOTE change of venue
Next week's Hash is from the Church CP at Manaton OD Kestor Inn with Poacher haring. Bring your torches.
On-On to next week. MP
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