A WARM WELCOME FROM TVH3

Welcome to the Teign Valley Hash House Harriers of glorious South Devon. You are guaranteed a warm welcome and a great hash experience. We are the 'Party Hash' and we run from pubs all over Torbay, Dartmoor and the Teign Valley every Monday evening at 7.15pm. Our trails are marked with flour, chalk or sawdust and take in woodland, streams, byways, bridle paths and rolling countryside. We cater for all abilities, you needn't worry about keeping up, a leisurely walk with others or a good paced run if you're fit - you choose. The run duration is anything from 30 minutes to an hour and the distance is normally between 3-6 miles depending on whether you decide to take a short or long trail. Your first run is free, so come along and give it a go! After the run hashers enjoy a drink and food in the pub. On many occasions, the pub will lay on a 'Hash Menu', food specially for hashers.

WHAT TO EXPECT AT YOUR FIRST HASH

Starts soon after 7:15 pm each Monday.
The Grandmaster will gather the hash together in a circle and welcome Virgins & Visitors to TVH3 and inform the group of pertinent news or upcoming events.
Hares will announce details or the trail, number of long and short splits and regroups.

Down-Downs - sometimes at the circle but usually in the pub after the run. Hashers and harriets (lady hashers) have a half pint and under age hashers have a soft drink or water. If you are driving, just ask the RA for water.

A Down-Down is a means of punishing, rewarding, or merely recognizing an individual for any action or behavior. Once awarded, the downdown must be drunk without pause, otherwise the RA may take action!

Individuals may be recognized for outstanding service, or for their status as a visitor or newcomer.

Down-Downs also serve as punishment for misdemeanours real, imagined, or blatantly made up.

Such transgressions may include: wearing new shoes, pointing with a finger, or the use of real names rather than hash names.

Hash Names

The use of real names (nerd name) during an event is discouraged, and members are typically given a new "hash name," usually in deference to a particularly notorious escapade, a personality trait, or their physical appearance.

Members are named after attending the hash on several occasions or if something noteworthy occurs to prompt a naming.

Other hashers may share stories or observations about the individual, with the final name being chosen by general consensus from all suggestions put forward by the hash.

NEWCOMERS TO THE HASH
Completely new to hashing? Don't know what to expect? Worried, shy or nervous? You needn't be as all newcomers or virgins as they are known, will receive a warm welcome. When the hashers are called to make a circle - about 7:15 pm each Monday, the Grand Master will welcome all hashers and after various notices about forthcoming events etc are dealt with, he will ask if there are any visitors from other hashes or virgins present. You will be asked to come forward and be introduced to the hash. A tip to remember, don't wear new trainers as these are frowned upon by the RA (Religious Advisor) and will incur a sprinkling of flour over them. That's all there is to it and you can then step back and enjoy the run and the social get together after in the On Down (the pub). Whatever your pace, there are certain to be others who will keep you company along the trail. Walk, jog or run - it's up to you.
Hashing is all about making friends and having fun, so just turn up any Monday and have a go.

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TVH OPEN ALL HOURS, ONLY FOOLS AND CAR KEYS & NOT QUITE THE AUTOMOBILE ASSOCIATION

Run #1798  Monday 10th June Circle Bonehill Rocks Dartmoor OD The Rugglestone Inn (Poacher)

And the rains came out of the east in Biblical fashion, the heavens did open and Thor rode out in his goat drawn chariot to strike fear into the hearts of timid hashers. No, Oh Dearly Desperate, it did not look good for hashing tonight - especially up on the desolate moor...

A few hours previous and it had been so different. Poacher had started to lay the trail in sunshine and the forecast of light rain was but a minor cloud [sic] on the horizon.  Then at about 4pm things turned nasty...

From within his bar bunker, the Grand Master sent out a rallying call to his wavering troops: 'Are we hashers or ARE WE HASHERS!' And while some dillied and derided, the TV warriors made ready.

At 6:40pm Haldon Hash reportedly ran up the white flag whilst the ones chosen by the hashing gods, proceeded to Bonehill. Yes, Oh Dearly Open All Hours, we might just be frying tonight.

A tiny knot of chariots revealed themselves in the lee of Bonehill Rocks and yes, there were hashers there, Oh Dearly Kept the Faith..
As if by divine intervention, the rain ceased, all was still and the naysayers fell silent.

The Grand Master himself was outside, exhorting his tiny contingent and there was Beefy of course along with the ex AA battle wagon with Jessie plus one virgin hasher inside. Awaiting instructions were Manpig, Just Coming, Archangel & the Vice President KC, Only Here, BB and of course our courageous hare Poach.

The Penners, Wet Johnny and Erection and 69 had checked in earlier when it was still peeing down and were the advance party to the Ruggle. Poacher explained that there 'should' be a trail out there and there was a L/S split. Local lass Jessie had volunteered to run 'live' so, against all expectations, there was a game to be played.  And off they sped!

By the time I had changed into my Yeti wind chill suit, unkindly called a 'scenes of crime suit' by Manpig, the micro hash had disappeared so  the GM and I headed for the elevation of Bonehill rocks to see what was going on out there in darkening Dartmoor.
It was a grand view we had atop the rocks but then came the first inkling of drama. 'Oi! Here for the Beer! He's nicking my keys! Leave the keys!' cried an alarmed Grand Master, but Only Here was driving off with Manpig and evidently taking the GM's car keys with him - Oh Despicable and Dick Dastardly deed!

Returning to the car, no sign of the keys could be found and it had to be assumed that Only Here had them now in the pub. There was only one thing for it - drive to the Ruggle and retrieve the keys and then back for the car.... sigh.

There then ensued an Only Fools chase down to the pub. Emerging from the bar, the GM snarled 'Don't ask Bluebird, just drive!' And back to Bonehill we went, the GM explaining that Only Here had given the keys to Beefy the Marathon Man!  We could be up at Bonehill for hours... long sigh 

There was a gnashing of teeth and many curses uttered before eventually, the Penner's chariot was seen approaching. Could it be that salvation was at hand?  Why YES! They only had the keys and the comic progression was unravelled:  Beefy had given the keys to Poacher who had arrived at the Ruggle to find that the GM had been and gone so he had given them to WJ to take back up - Get it? Got it. Good!  Muttering vengeance on Here for the Beer, the GM was ferried back once again to the Rugglestone. Ain't hashing grand!

Double déjà vu, but there was a right royal Ruggle rejoicing as we found TVH snugly ensconced in the back room awaiting the hash grub.

Oh yes, Oh Dearly Deserved, Legend was supped, stirring tall tales were told as we awaited the Brave. 'How long before Beefy gets here?' someone enquired and the response from Only Here was somewhat disappointing: 'He won't come back here, I'll buy you all a beer if he does!' Shirley Only Here knew something that we evidently did not - a bet such as that from a beer lover like him would not have been made without firm intelligence...

Yes, you have guessed right, Oh Dearly The Drinks Are On Only Here... Beefy, Jessie and Raf arrived (Portugese not Polish Raf) to cheers and a solitary groan from the TV banquet table.

Fortified with our beer bet beer, Head RA Manpig delivered the DDs to his tiny but enthusiastic audience. First up was the grim-faced GM and no surprises as Only Free Beer was awarded the Bat Hat for his car key catastrophe. Most unfortunately, the RA, whose word is final, decided that the GM should also get a DD for his Only Fools car chase for the keys and the final DD was given to the heroic hare for laying the extreme weather trail.

There was one last deed to be done, a naming for Jessie. 'Who does the yellow van belong to?' brought a look of trepidation to her eyes but it ended well enough, I think, with a handle of A**eh**es Anonymous. Oh dear, I wonder what P**swell will say...

I think Beefy's post hash comment sums up what we all thought about the unusual evening: 

'What a brilliant evening down the Rugglestone: great company and very entertaining in an intimate setting. One of the best times I've ever had after a trail. On-On!'

Grateful thanks to Jessie, Raf and Beefy for completing (and validating) the 4.5 mile trail and Poacher for laying it.

ON ON to next week and hopefully better weather - it is mid June after all - from The Cridford Inn Trusham (TQ13 0NR) with Forrest Stump.





TVH3 HABERDASHERY LINK

NEW MISMANAGEMENT & CONTACT TELS.

Grand Master Shitfaced mobile 07973 682201
Vice G M Winfield mobile 07855355338
On Sec Piltdown Man mobile 07773038756
R A Organiser Teapot
R A Manpig
R A Forrest Stump
R A Fallen Woman
Hash Cash Threesome
Hash Tax Satnav
Trail Raiser Doris
Haberdashery Zoot
Song Master Pork Torpedo
Social Sec T. Humper
Spider /Web Bluebird
Life President Pottsie
Vice President K C

HASH SUBS

HASH SUBS £25 and for your assistance you can now use the BACS payment system to pay please.
Details as follows.... Hash Account number 69068186 Sort code 55-70-01 NOTE you must use your HASH NAME as a reference. Many thanks Three-Some & Satnav

JESSE'S DD FROM THE TALLY HO!

EXPLANATION OF ARCHIVE TVH3 SITES

GREATHASHGOD: A dedicated site (presently mothballed and serves as archive content only) with all TVH3 content. Mostly photos from each Monday's hash but also some video clips. Named after our Life President Pottsie.

PRECONDEROTOUS: Containing the entire archive of TVH3 of some 1000 vid clips and over 5000 posts and photos. Started on November 11th 2007, the site is active with Bluebird's personal content but the archive content is fascinating and preserved, well worth a look.

Fukarwi

Fukarwi

REARENDER

REARENDER

TEAPOT

TEAPOT

SOAPY

SOAPY

MOULDY DICK

MOULDY DICK

MELONPICKER

MELONPICKER

FALLEN WOMAN

FALLEN WOMAN

DORIS

DORIS

BROKEN MAN

BROKEN MAN

ARCHANGEL

ARCHANGEL

ABLE SEMEN

ABLE SEMEN

Previously unreleased clip - Vicky's naming from the Sea Trout

FOR TVH3 HABERDASHERY CONTACT ZOOT

FOR TVH3 HABERDASHERY CONTACT ZOOT

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