Run #1811 Monday 9th September from the Park Inn, Kingskerswell with T Humper (A 9919 dateline as recalled by the Artful Dogger)
The
perennial hash riddle drifted through my mind as I tried hard to keep
Runner Bean in sight in the last two miles of the run: What is mightier
oh hash brethren, the trail or the On Down? The ditherers would say
both are equal but on this particular night my vote was Shirley for the
inspired trail set in such demanding
circumstances - and I think a few of us out there thought the same, Oh
Dearly Melon Picker Excepted...
'I
was misinformed, I thought the trail would have been about half a
mile!' quoth Manpig post hash and yes, it was quite a surprise that T
Humper and Shitfaced managed to lay any trail of substance following the
weekend 40th Birthday celebrations.
Adding
to the difficulties, the rain had arrived, and a daunting task lay
[sic] ahead for the hares but what a triumph the trail proved to be, so
back to the beginning to fill in the details oh Dearly Devoted...
Circle
roll: GM Shitfaced, T Humper, Never Wet, Getting Wet, I-Poo'd, Flasher,
Runner Bean, Plonker, Artful Dogger, Beefy, Winfield, Teapot, Piltdown,
Georgy, Manpig, Wet Johnny, Manopause, Erection, Doris, Rambo, 3Sum,
SatNav, Wigwam, GaGa 4it, Triple Jump, Footloose, Nikki and virgin Mark,
Coldtits, Fallen Woman, Able, Pisswell, 69, Soapy, Melon Picker, Libby,
Compo, U Bend, Archangel, SM Ellie, Dan, Holly, Zoot, Hotlips,
Paraprick (gave a lift to some sorely pressed shorts so unsure whether
he partook of any of the run), Woof Woof, BB.
A
goodly turnout of some forty seven party goers with Bobby 'dead leg'
Woll managing to drive his Panzer over for the beer (Bobby, as the
Panzer isn't converted to drive on beer - No? Well...) and finally
return the Vampire Bat Hat.
Grandly
did the Grand Master introduce the evening's fare with the
grandiloquent* statement: 'Welcome to the Park Inn - the home of
hashing!' and the sages wisely nodded and muttered approval.
The
usual shenanigans at the circle saw GaGa 4it present and duly assist
the GM back into his weekend jester costume as the FRBs got twitchy,
adjusting head torches and footwear for the upcoming Fray Bentos.
Three trails accommodating walkers, shorts and longs and we were directed left from the car park to start the adventure.
The
usual suspects (Beefy, Flasher, Plonker, Artful Dogger, Runner Bean)
were, as usual, on a mission and led us up to the quarries turn off. We
were already strung out From Here to Eternity and the first climb did
further damage. Fortunately for the languishing longs, the FRBs
contrived to miss the hard a starboard turn from Milber lane into Castle
Plantation and careered into a housing estate before backtracking to
find the trail true.
The
beneficiaries of the blunder were encountered as we hit the playing
fields and time for a bit of chitchat as the pecking order was
re-established. Manpig was suffering from the weekend activities and was
firing on one cylinder but still gave it his best shot in vain pursuit
alongside Woof Woof.
Just
after the playing fields and there was confusion over a L/S split -
the result being that a band of hashers comprising Winfield, Fallen
Woman, U Bend and Melon Picker and also Coldtits (I think) inadvertently
strayed onto the 10K long trail. However, all had more than enough
ability to cope with the imposition. Coldtits covered seven miles plus
and recorded her second longest run - richly deserving a DD nomination.
Wasn't
that a pretty little Christmas light festooned cottage? No time to
admire the scenery though as the FRBs were tauntingly calling up ahead
and with red visors down, Artful Dogger, Manpig, Woof Woof, Dan and
Holly kept on trucking, down, way way blessed down the rough path.
Coming back on ourselves, a trail of Hey ho, off to work we go lights
could be seen and jolly messages of encouragement could be shouted
across the divide. A cry of lament from the festooned cottage drifted
downwards: 'Bluebird, are we still on the short? (!)' No Dad, I don't
think so!
Through
a gloomy gorge we struggled, valley of the shade of death' -
interspersed with knee tickling stinging nettles and mightily
invigorating they were though Runner Bean was not quite so enthusiastic.
If
it hadn't been for Runner Bean faithfully calling up ahead, I would
have gone astray on more than one occasion and would even have missed
the entry (and exit!). to the famous cabbage field.
Back
at the 'Home of Hashing' and Park 'n' Ride had thoughtfully put out
some towels for us to dry ourselves off - what a nice touch and I
believe a TVH first, bravo!
Artful
Dogger enquired if we had noticed the doggers in the lay by close to
the OH. A gleeful guffaw at his Strava comment which I may not be at
liberty to re-post.
Towels
none for our feted RA Manpig, who set off for a quick wash and brush up
at his nearby chateau before returning to do the bizzo.
The
Ferryman was my ale of choice but I nearly OD'd on the giant grab bags
of Quavers - Park 'n' Ride becoming suspicious after my third bag.
Thanks
are due to the hares T Humper and Grand Master, I-Poo'd (varied
alcoholic laced fudges - praised by all) and our thoughtful host Park
'n' Ride. A Birthday Hash sans pareil. Olé!
*I cannot recall ever using grand, grandly and grandiloquent together before.
Over to you Winfield:
WINFIELD'S WISDOM & AWARDS
Where
after a dry start there was rain later, with the Hares 3+ miles Short
turning into a nearly 6+ run after U-Bend, Mellon Picker, Fallen Woman,
and I managed to transfer to the Long trail just after those playing
fields!
We
joked about the Longs having to run uphill from Haccombe only to find
ourselves climbing the same route later! Woods tracks rocks cabbage
fields, we had it all with Fallen Woman now wishing we had a taxi just
as Paraprick's car pulled up saving us those last few miles.
Back
at the Park the party was now in full swing with plenty of good food,
alcoholic sweets and excellent cake plus a few shots after, we had soon
forgotten that unexpected Long experience!
Well done T.Humper for a great trail! all of those special drinks and very tasty cake!
Awards on T.Humper's extravaganza evening were presented to....
T.Humper a shot Birthday song and DD.
Paraprick thanks for giving a lift to needy Hashers
Nickie for no response to a toot toot! but Mark soon drank up instead!
Zoot a Birthday DD not but sure for what or when?
Dolly and King! a DD for that karaoke performance!
ON ON to next week and please note the revised Circle location at Venford Reservoir (TQ13 7SS) OD Forest Inn Hexworthy ( Pisswell)
