by Man-Pig
The Palk Arms, Hennock (in lieu of postponed Fireworks' Hash)
Run No. 1942
HARES: Forrest Stump & Wood Lend
Who
wuz there: Forrest Stump, Wood Lend, Shitfaced (circle only), Man-Pig,
Piltdown Man, Smellie, Beefy, Pisswell, AA (Pisswell's daughter), Raf
(to be named), Big End, Well-Hopped, Ned, Swinger, Ernie, Manopause,
Wet Johnny, Fallen Woman, Fukarewe.
The Circle
The
forecast of gale-force winds and heavy showers did not deter eighteen
hashers from making the blustery trip up to Hennock for a change from
the originally advertised venue.
The
Teign Valley road is closed for 10 days so Forrest's Firework Hash had
to be postponed. Just as well because nothing was going to burn, fly
or explode in this weather.
The
Firework Hash is now rescheduled for 21st November - weather
permitting. So get down to Trago Mills and see if they've got any
fireworks going half price.
As
per usual, the circle commenced with Smellie reiterating her request
for Hares. The only date that remains unfilled for this year is Boxing
Day! U-bend couldn't now do 5th December but someone has stood in for
this slot.
Returnee
Fallen Woman, resplendent with healthy tan, confirmed that the annual
Brixham Fish 'n' chip run would take place on 12 December. I seem to
recall that the fish 'n' chips will be delivered to the on-down for
consumption. This will be CAMRA's South Devon pub of the year for 2020,
The Queens. Man-Pig requested a volunteer for the Words. No
takers......yet again.
The Trail
The
trail commenced with the whole pack trotting from the pub, along
Church Lane and past the church, to the dead end. A Walkers' trail was
marked to the left and through the churchyard. Amazingly, there were no
takers.
At
the end of the cul-de-sac, we passed through a wicket gate and down
the public footpath towards the fantastically named Twizzle Tree
Cottage. The field gave way to woodland as we started our descent to
the bottom of the valley. Down a couple of steps and then a dogleg. A
concrete drive took us downhill towards the cottage for a hundred yards
before we spied a public footpath sign to our left. It was back into
woodland and uphill through Greatrock Copse and past Great Rock itself.
This
area of the valley is heavily mined and, at times, there was a steep
drop to our right. Up and up and up followed by down and down as Wet
Johnny led the pack towards a distant lone torch. This was Wood Lend
and Fuddle guiding us down and to the first of two Long/Short splits.
At
Beadon Bridge, the Shorts went left and up Beadon Lane. The Longs were
directed right and up into Newton Cleave Wood. Here we came to a mark
which almost no-one recognised. It was a fishhook with the number 4
below it. The first four to the fishhook were Beefy, Raf, Wet-Johnny
and Man-Pig. A bit of head scratching went on whilst Swinger, Ernie and
Manopause caught up, closely followed by Big End, Well Hopped and Ned.
Some
thought it was the sweetie stop and looked for non-existent sweets.
Man-Pig, who knew exactly what this was, simply asked if anyone was
behind us. "Yes. Pisswell and AA" replied Big End. "OK, we'll wait for
them and push on" suggested the Pig.
The
fishhook had sort of been complied with - despite Swinger saying
"You've broken the rules". "There are no rules on the Hash my dear!".
Not
far after the fishhook, the track levelled off and we came to a
T-junction. This was on the broad track that is, nominally, the boundary
between Netton Cleave Wood and Canonteign Down. An obvious place for a
check but we found nothing.
Soon
there was a shout of "On-On" to our left. Wet-Johnny was on trail as
we headed back towards the reservoirs on the high path. Another check
and we were on a more minor path that descends back to the Long/Short
split at Beadon Bridge. Here we rejoined the Shorts (who we never
caught up) and ascended Beadon Lane to Chericombe Head.
Chericombe
Head provided the second and last Long/Short split. Wet-Johnny was
waiting for Manopause and I guess that they both took the Shorts' route
back to the pub via Bell Lane.
Raf
and Beefy were well ahead. Not even a reflection of their torchlight
in the distance as Ernie and I commenced the final Long. This took us
down the bridal path that enters Hennock at Five Lanes and, inevitably,
a check. Beefy and Raf were running back to kick-out the check but I
had already done the needful.
Up
to this point, the weather hadn't been as bad as forecast but now it
was pelting down. Despite the torrential downpour, Beefy had decided to
dispense with his kagool. I, on the other had, zipped up and rummaged
around for my beanie hat. A quarter mile trot back into Hennock had us
back at the pub in no time.
What a fantastic evening to be out and close to nature whilst everyone else was tucked up at home.
The Down-Downs
Back
at the pub, the landlord had put on a vey welcome chilli con carne.
This, despite the fact that Monday is the chef's night off. Just what
we wanted after a wet and windy run.
First
up was Fukarewe to award the Bat Hat. Initially, there was a story
about a hasher who thought that he knew where he was going, "Because
I've seen an arrow", but proved to be wrong.
However,
this was trumped by an out-of-hash sighting the previous week.
Fukarewe had been out and about on his antiquated two wheeled British
iron when he saw what he thought to be a hasher. He was correct. This
was Big End having a pee at the side of the road. We did ask which part
of the hasher Fukarewe recognised but there was no answer. A note for
the "Hasher Slasher".
Next
up was Forrest. He had been passed the hashshit shirt to award.
Forrest had thoughtfully hung it outside to get a good clean before
awarding it to Beefy. Beefy had started the trail with a kagool, hood,
gloves and survival pack but ended up back at the pub in just a pair of
speedos. Accordingly, a note for the "Wardrobe malfunction".
There were no other awards but there was an un-named hasher in our presence - Raf.
Now,
Raf is Portugese and the last time we saw him was four years ago at
the Rugglestone when Jess was named AA (pronounced "Ahhhhh"). The jury
is still out as to whether this is an abbreviation for "arseholes
anonymous" or a reference to Mum's van.
Some
naming suggestions were put to the floor, all pivoting around the
initials RAF. In a wholly undemocratic conservative three line whip,
Raf was duly anointed "Raffasfuk".
A
final half of the valley's finest ale to dish out. The award properly
went to a deserving Hare. However, Forrest admitted that the reality
was that he had been the Hare's assistant. The true hero of the hour
was Wood Lend. Hence Forrest nominated his son as the worthy recipient
of the final down-down.
Well
done Hares. A great trail laid in atrocious weather conditions. Well
worth the journey out to darkest Hennock and a very welcoming pub to
boot.
Next week
Wed
Wock Brewery, Humber with Hares Big End and Well Hopped. There is a
deal on regarding food. i.e. a pasty and a pint for some money (I've
forgotten how much was quoted).
More importantly, if you want food,
Well Hopped needs to know by Thursday.
Well
Hopped/Bluebird will put something on the Facebook page so that hungry
hashers can place their orders by the deadline. We are, additionally,
promised that Jackie is coming out of retirement to serve behind the
bar....sterling service.
On-On to next week.
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