The words, hash no 2125, 20/4/26 from the Rugglestone, Widecombe.
Hare: Beefy
Nearly St George’s day hash
Who
wuz there: A really good turnout for the wilds of Dartmoor with Strap
on, Strap dancer, SMEllie, Manpig, Woodlend, Tongue and Groove,
Coldtits, Beeflicker, Beefy, Pisswell, Rodger the Dodger, Big End, Well
hopped, Wet fart, Georgie Porgie, Piltdown man, Warmfront and Pocket
Rocket.
And returnees: Fuckarwe, Wet Johnny, Manopause, Deep Semen
The
circle: With a minute to spare before the start and our last arrival,
Piltdown man announced next weeks hash in Torquay, at the Kent’s inn,
which he warned would be very steep. As he went on to get numbers for
scoff, he was stopped for going over the start time and for premature
Annunciation.
Pisswell
also got over excited by trying to remind the GM ( who was nervously
looking at his watch for 5 minutes) that he should welcome the
returnees, particularly Deep Semen, whose name she had struggled to
remember. Unfortunately, in putting up her hand to say this, she
nominated herself for these words and to buy the Live and Let Live Inn
at Landscove!
The hare: An unknown mileage in an Easterly wind. Walkers DIY, longs longer than shorts etc.
The trail: More to come from Beefy.
The on downs:
As
9 o’ clock deadline approached and GM Pocket Rocket nervously checked
and rechecked his watch, a VIP Harriet was still on trail, and hare
Beefy kindly had gone to look for signs of her in the churchyard!
Pisswell, as RA, herded cats as some hashers were outside and some in
the warm, making a social gathering and down downs tricky!
She
put on the policeman’s helmet to announce that the harriet was alive
and the hare would be arriving in the next few minutes. A special
dispensation would be awarded and no fine delivered!
Beefy arrived to applause, dressed in his simple knight’s outfit and planning to joist later with fellow Knight, Sir Big End.
He was thanked for the beers and a really excellent trail, as always.
1.
So, the first award was to the hare, to “The grand old Hunk of Beef”,
who had certainly found some good old hills to walk/ run us up and down
again!
2.
We always enjoy a No 2! Tongue and Grove, a winner but absent from the
awards night, was serenaded “here’s to the newcomer. She’s so blue”. (
she won for newcomer, not her no. 2!)
3.
Hares already laid this year were invited to stand up and were toasted
for their performance and stamina. They were split into small groups and
didn’t know what they were doing! Pisswell explained about her early
start that morning and Beefys late start, both at 7 o’clock and
discussing getting up at 2 minutes to, or waiting. He had totally
forgotten saying that it was like “splitting hares”, as, do a few
minutes really matter? Thanks hares for splitting, when most of you
didn’t even understand or care! Pisswell asked if anyone had not laid a
trail yet, to get some best excuses! However, nearly everyone had, which
is just great. Strap dancer fortunately got picked on and admitted to
just having co-hared. However, she is busy most Mondays doing other
things, which she wouldn’t go into detail about, but which always,
always happens on a Monday, no matter what! Question is……is that why
Strap on doesn’t do that many trails too? So “Here’s to the split
hares…”She drank by straw and with a foot on her head and policeman’s
helmet for her punishment.
4.
“She’s the meanest”! The Union Jack hat went from Beeflicker to
Pisswell for thinking she saw a camel! Although she doesn’t remember
this, maybe she saw several as I think there was indeed a caravan in the
village carpark. This week she really did see the sea, two Roe deer, a
new foal and heard the cuckoo. Beefy had taken the afternoon off and
since about three o’clock had been arranging it all! Thanks. Thanks
Beeflicker too for your push to the river to get rid of that camel shit!
5.
Piltdown man was awarded the jester hat for his premature annunciation
and we sang “Why was he born so beautiful?” We then told him to spill it
all out and announce his and Georgie’s hash next week, but no one
listened as we’d already heard it (as above) and some people ran out the
door to get home.
Not
socialising folks? Down downs a bit long or complicated? Apologies from
Pisswell, who was the only one who knew what she was thinking! Please
feel free to give it a go yourselves, anytime Remember, “There’s no
rules in hashing!”You’d be very welcome.
Anyway, the hard core left at 11, as some of them
didn’t have far to go for a change, and the others presumably didn’t
care! Seriously though, thanks to our lovely hashers. We know it’s a
long way, early starts etc so thanks so much to you all for coming and
hope you enjoyed seeing a bit of Dartmoor.
Well done, Beefy. On on to next week. Pisswell x
The iambic pentameter was never my strong point: I have two left metrical feet so, I apologise for what follows.
There is an inn, the Rugglestone Inn,
'neath old Withycombe Hill.
There they serve such beer of taste
That TVH3 went down, in haste,
That night to take their fill.
Under the sun, the evenin began,
The Circle at seven and a quarter.
The Trail had been laid,
Announcements were made,
Get going is now something we oughta.
With thoughts of an ale, checking "right" on the Trail,
Heading off to old Venton Farm,
A short shiggy track, back onto tarmac,
Then Dunstone appeared like a charm.
Up past the chapel with a hill they must grapple,
The prospect is quite devastating.
The dots are still there, they were laid by the Hare,
An experience most elevating.
We all feel the pain of an altitude gain,
As we find our way through living glory.
It soon levels out and without any doubt,
Our senses will tell the whole story.
A flag on the ground and barely a sound,
But a Cuckoo and a distant "On" call,
The S/S was found. It's something renowned
For displeasing a Hash, not at all!
Measure for measure, it's the greatest of pleasure,
To walk or run under the sky
across this fine land. We just understand:
We know how but just can't explain why.
All but one had returned so, the Hare was concerned.
But, was somebody wanting his bed?
"We'll wait for the Hare, he's somewhere out there."
"But, the time's almost nine!" he had said.
Although late to the Trail, carries on without fail,
She's a real Teign Valley anchor.
We gave her a cheer but, embarrassed, I fear.
So, for finishing, I need to thank her.
Demolishing beers to songs and to cheers,
The Down-downs seemed gone in a second.
So, it's over. I'm glad. (The Trail wasn't bad.)
A kind of success, so it's reckoned.
Thank you all for turning up.
On on. Beefy.
Editor's note: I think you'll agree that this is magnificent!
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