HARE: Beefy
Who wuz there: Beefy, Pocket Rocket, Man-Pig, Pisswell, Beeflicker, Piltdown Man, Georgy Porgy & grand daughter Monica, Archangel, Coldtits, Warmfront, Psycho, Miss'ing, Roger the Dodger, Big End and friend/relative? (not a virgin, been once before but I'm afraid that I did not get his name), Well Hopped, Melon Picker, Strap-On, Strap Dancer, Ernie, Wet Johnny, Manopause, Bobbiball, Wetfart and non-running returnees, Teapot, Mouldy Dick and Wick Dipper
Circle
Briefings at this evening's circle were just that - brief. It was announced that registration is now open for next year's Nash hash which is being hosted by the combined Devon Hashes. It will take place over the August Bank holiday 2027 and is being hosted at Blundell's school, Tiverton. it appeared that a number of TVH'ers had already registered....fantastic. If you are interested check-out the following website http://www.nashhashuk.run UK hashers get a week's head start on international hashers as registration is exclusively open to UK hashers up until 20 July when registration extends internationally.
Nash Hash plug completed Manopause volunteered Man-Pig to do The Words before he had a chance to get a word out. So, over to the Hare.
Beefy advised that there were three trails. The Longs would be about 5.5 miles. The Walkers was an out & back to the beach at circa 2 miles leaving the shorts somewhere in between. There were 4 Long/Short splits and a refreshment stop, of sorts, near the beach....bring a towel.
Trail
Well, Beefy gave us a beautiful trail with more twists and turns than an Agatha Christie novel. I am fairly familiar with the trails around Cockington Court but even I was flummoxed by some of the topography.
The trail commenced northwards up Cockington Lane and the first Long/Short split. The Longs went Long and the Shorts went Short and Man-Pig did both. Whether this was due to deafness, blindness or both - nobody knows & nobody cares, save a candidate for a DD later on.
The Shorts went up an ancient tree lined track that, despite being almost mid summer, was quite dark in places. The first check had us down a narrow track for a short way before another check took us through an orchard (virgin territory) and back onto the original track only to find a cross. A few steps back and we squeezed through the narrowest of gaps in a dry stone wall to arrive at a "S". but no "L'. Apparently Big End and Strap-On had been shouting to the Pig that he was on the Shorts. And so began the game of snakes and ladders as the Pig backtracked to the start of the Long.
The Long took us a little further up Cockington Lane and then left and up a track towards the fruit farm copse and then left again along a wooded up & down track left through a gate down across a meadow to emerge on the upper reaches of the track that the Shorts had taken. Surprise. Surprise. We were back at the narrow gap in the dry stone wall and rejoining the shorts trail. A lovely jaunt down, then up and left through open meadow interspersed with trees (oak I think). Across Totnes Road and a dogleg down to the Warren Barn and the second L/S split. Here I caught up with Psycho but I had heard the occasional call of "ON-ON" across the fields. This Long ran down a track parallel with the Totnes Road until turning right over a stile and down to the Gamekeeper's cottage where we caught up with Archangel and Coldtits at the edge of Manscombe Plantation.
We beared right and along the track parallel with a steam and back up to the Warren Barn. the trail skirted the western edge of the plantation before the trail took us into the plantation proper. It was just Psycho and I now following very good marks. the next check had us baffled. We ended up finding four false trails before finding the correct rout which was a little diagonal through an obvergrown field that took us back onto a major path at the south=east of the plantation. Down hill where Psycho opened up a lead before grinding to a halt....puzzled.
"What is a circle with a cross in it?"
"It is a backcheck dear lady".
We duly backchecked over a stone bridge and down some steps to the lane below. There was a strange sense that I've been here before. I think this was the early part of a Beefy trail about 7 years ago. On the lane below the bridge an orange line of chalk indicated we were on trail. Over a new timber slatted bridge over the stream that flows to Livermead beach. We were on the "Out & back" Walkers' trail and, sure enough, we encountered the Shorts and Walkers returning from the refreshment stop at the beach.
The sweetie stop was another surprise. Beefy has made flap jacks and cut them into isosceles triangles....but we HAD to pick them up by their point end. Why? All soon became clear as we held them up for Beefy to add a layer of confectionery cream topped with a Cadbury's flake. Voila! A 99 without the risk of melting....brilliant.
It was just like being at the movies. We took our "ice creams" and sat back to enjoy the wet T-shirt competition. It was high tide with a relatively stiff onshore breeze. The waves were crashing into and over the sea wall at times. The opportunity for a safe dip had been, well, washed away so to speak. this did not deter our intrepid Harriets, Strap-Dancer, Pisswell and Miss'ing from venturing forward to check just how big the waves were. Bigger than they thought as it turned out. As soon as they ventured onto the top of the steps on the other side of the sandstone sea wall a huge wave broke over them. They were all soaked! But which was the wettest?
We backtracked when we'd came and now it was time for the Down Downs.
Down-Downs
There was one, significant, fly in the ointment regarding the Down Downs. They had run out of cask beer; the Bass was gone...and would not be coming back on. Even worse, the next beer that was coming on was one of my favourites - Dark Star Hophead. However, it had just be laid down and wouldn't be available until tomorrow. the only beer remaining on tap was the lovely, but expensive, Neck Oil at £6.50/pint....and so that it what we were obliged to undertake the DD's with.
Outside the pub it was excellent to see Teapot back again along with Wickdipper and Mouldy Dick. A lovely way in which to end an equally lovely run.
We started by thanking the Hare for an excellent trail with matching sweetie stop. But, who were this evening's culprits?
Melonpicker has the Hashshit shirt to award. There was some talk as whether or not to award it to Beefy for promoting a swim stop during a high tide and south easterly breeze. However, and despite stiff competition, the first DD went to Strap-Dancer for winning the impromptu Wet T-shirt competition....a shirt that she was promptly banned from wearing in the car on the way home on health & safety grounds.
Next up is Strap-On himself. He has the Jester's hat. He is on the Shorts and running with Big End. However, Big End had a recurring issue as to whether or not a dot of flour was, in fact, a mark and, as a consequence, were they even on trail? An ecumenical discussion ensued as to whether the term "Doubting Thomas" had its origins in St Thomas Aquinas. The bunch of Heathens that comprised the pack had no idea but Beefy suggested that it was the Apostle Thomas who doubted that Christ was actually dead on the cross. Accordingly, a note for the "Apostle".
We are now bereft of awards but not stories. Ernie has a story about a farm animal and not just any farm animal. For this animal has a disability it would seem. It is both deaf and blind.....poor thing. It also has an addiction...an addiction for following blobs of flour - but these are not his to follow - are they Man-Pig? As the Pig had gayly snorted his way along the Shorts for the first half mile of the trail before returning to commence the Long. Mouldy Dick jumped into RA duty with, "This is your Down-Down song. It won't take very long".
The final half of mega expensive beer awaits. But whose lips will it fall upon. The RA asks what the pack would be doing if they had other, more important, commitments on a Hash night. Perhaps it was someone's birthday, a christening, wedding or signifiant birthday; a birth or important hospital appointment perhaps? The RA then asks Piltdown man what day it is?
"It is the 13th of July".
"On what date did you get married?"
"13th July".
With that Georgie Porgy & Piltdown Man share the final DD whilst the rest of the pack book a room at the Drum and come back after after breakfast just in time to catch the end of the DD.
An expensive car park and a pub with no beer sandwiching an excellent trail with matching "ice cream" stop. A brilliant evening. Thank you Beefy.
Next week
Next week's Hash is from the Holne, Dartmoor. Our Hare is Pisswell. Bring money as donations for food and beer.
On-On to next week, MP
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