KESTOR INN THIS MONDAY

Run #2045 Monday 16th October 7:15 pm Circle up from Kestor Inn, Manaton, Dartmoor National Park, Kestor Inn, Manaton, Newton Abbot TQ13 9UF with Ollie, Poacher & Compo.

CARRY ON CRUISING!

TVH3 The Words for 7th October 2024

 

Cofton Holiday Park,

 

Winfield Memorial Run

 

Run No. 2044

 

HARES: Coldtits & Polyfella

 

 

 

Who wuz there: Coldtits, Polyfella, Shitfaced, Man-Pig, Beefy, Beeflicker, Pocket Rocket, Piltdown Man, Georgy Porgy, Smellie, Roger the Dodger, Big End, Well Hopped, Melon Picker, Soapy, Palmolive, Smash, Charlotte (now Mismash), Threesum, Pork Torpedo, Hornie & guest of honour - Sparky

 

Circle

The forecast was not conducive to a large turnout; a mere 90% chance of rain at 7pm. Somehow, the Hash Gods had been kind to us and our run turned out to be almost completely dry if a tad windy.

A rather dashing Piltdown Man was on car parking duty and directed us down to the overflow car park at Cofton chapel cemetery where we circled up.

 

Tonight was Winfield's memorial Hash and there was a topical theme - cruising, a holiday favourite for Winfield and Hovel Annie. Hashers were encouraged to come in "cruise themed" fancy dress either for the run, the pub or both.

 

Pocket Rocket came as a swimmer with no shirt - a trifle cold for that. Beefy was a waiter with a tray with a bottle of wine and three wine glasses glued to it. Smellie was a life guard and Man-Pig was all at sea wearing an ABLJ.....maybe he'd been aboard the Costa Concordia?

 

Announcements were particularly brief;

 

Sparky, Winfield's son-in-law would be joining us in the pub (in fact he got there early enough to do the run, albeit backwards!).

 

Broken Man is now back from France but maybe back in hospital with recurring knee issues.

 

Shitfaced reminded us that Cheerio Beerio has organised a pottery piss-up this weekend in St Marychurch/Babbacombe - details are on the TVH3 Facebook page.

 

Over to the Hares, Polyfella and Coldtits. Polyfella explained that we were running from east of Dawlish as this is the area where Winfield tended to lay many of his trails. In fact, we would be duplicating parts of previous Winfield trails on the way round this evening. Polyfella promised the Walkers a casual one and a half miles. The Longs would be five and three quarter miles and the Shorts would be somewhere in-between.

 

"Pay attention now. Marks will always be on the right".

 

Trail

The trail took us back into the holiday park and behind the main reception building then up towards the static homes before an arrow had us left and uphill through Cofton Copse. Beeflicker and Beefy were leading followed by Pocket Rocket; behind them were Big End, Well Hopped and Man-Pig which, I think, comprised all of the Longs with Polyfella sweeping.

 

We zigzagged our way through Cofton Copse before arriving at the Walkers/Long & Short split at Cofton Hill. Fortunately we were at the top of Cofton Hill and and the Longs and Shorts were directed downhill towards Orchard Lane. An arrow had us turn right. 

 

At the bottom of the hill, I saw torchlight in the far distance. It was Beefy and Beeflicker heading inland along Orchard Lane. At the junction of Cofton Hill and Orchard Lane an arrow directed all to the right and I followed the FRB's but only to be called back. I had overrun an arrow but the FRB's were now out of earshot.

 

A suspiciously new arrow had us go through a five bar gate and along the south western edge of Easton Wood. The marks took us down and across the edge of two fields until we arrived at Shutterton Lane. Big End, Well Hopped and the Pig were the new FRB's and heading due east towards Dawlish Warren. 

 

At the junction of Shutterton Lane with Dawlish Warren Road we arrived at the Long/Short split. The Shorts headed left and back towards Cockwood. The Longs were headed towards the Warren. We appeared to have run out of marks until the Pig found one on the opposite side of the road. A voice from behind. "Marks are always on the right". It was the Hare. Suitably chastised, the Pig recrosseed to the western side of Dawlish Warren Road.

 

Back on the outward trail we crossed onto a footpath that took us on a footbridge over the railway line and back towards the Warren. Past The Boathouse pub and along the sea wall. It was jolly breezy and there was a lot of foam as the onshore wind battered us. The sea was, all at once, both beautiful and dangerous. Thank goodness for the sea wall.

 

Well Hopped spied an arrow and we were now on duckboards and heading into and along the edge of the Warren golf course. We passed through the car park that was Point B for our 40th anniversary weekend at the end of August. Back up Beach Road, under the railway, and we were back on trail running past colourfully illuminated holiday accommodation.

 

We followed the cycle path all the way back to Cockwood and the drinks stop. Beefy and Beeflicker had caught up as we settled into a small bucks fizz...or two?

 

The drink stop took place outside the Ship Inn. This was appropriate as the last time that we ran from here two years ago was when we first heard the news of Winfield's hospitalisation and declining health. We raised our shot glasses of bucks fizz to Winfield's memory. We were protected from the wind here and all immediately felt tranquil and calm.

 

Our sweeping Hare arrived. We thought that everyone was accounted for. Piltdown confirmed that it was exactly half a mile back to the cars and off we trotted along Church Road morphing into Cofton Lane; a route that Winfield would have known well.

 

Down-Downs

A change of attire now has the pub populated with some very dapper cruisers, Piltdown Man, Polyfella and Coldtits. There were some naval personnel in the shape of a rather dodgy looking admiral, 

 

Melonpicker and a CPO submariner, Pork Torpedo. Clearly some of these maritime holiday makers were on a budget cruise, and in unseaworthy ships. Soapy and Roger the Dodger were wearing life jackets of varying vintages. But, never fear, Smellie was close at hand and dressed as a life guard.

 

Palmolive was wearing lovely sequinned black evening trousers and Shitfaced was in a penguin suit and ready for dining at the captain's table. Did I say, "penguin?" Horny had come as a penguin. Perhaps her cruise was to the south pole?

 

So, onto the Down-Downs.

 

As per usual, "What did we think of the run"". I think the consensus was that the the drink stop was excellent....bucks fizz. TVH3 is moving upmarket.

 

The pub had been particularly generous to us; six halves of real ale, Rolling Thunder and Tribute; also 3 halves of water for the drivers.The first of the Down-Downs has to go to the Hares for organising Winfield's memorial run, laying the trail and providing the rather posh drink stop. A note for the Hares as Coldtits has a beer whilst Polyfella settles on a glass of water.

 

"Who has an award?"

Pocket Rocket has the Hashshit shirt from last week. He is also somewhat perplexed as to what a penguin is doing on a cruise liner.......a stowaway perhaps? Has Hornie come as Pingu or one of Batman's arch enemies? A note for Gotham's finest.

Polyfella has the Turd Hat but no story. The Pig assists with a story from the weekend.

"How far would you go for a pint of beer?"

The Circle is both puzzled and quiet. The Pig then expands by mentioning that the means of transport is a bicycle. It is bucketing down with rain and the mystery cyclist had just done 14 miles across Dartmoor on the Devon A2B the previous day. All eyes turn to Beefy who turned up at Only Here for the Beer's birthday drinks in Abbotskerswell by bicycle.

"How far did you ride for a pint of beer Beefy?"

"Thirty five miles".

Psycho is not with us this evening. Never mind. A note for the Psychopath (or should that be "cycle path?").

 

We have a badge, and it is a big one, 600 runs. We play, "Guess the number". Well Hopped guesses correctly but to whom does it belong? Our Hare, Coldtits. Of course, we sing "Get a life......"

Charlotte is a little more enthused this week than last. It is time to give her a Hash handle. But what? She is called into the Circle to tell us a little about herself.

"What do you like doing?"

"The hash"....great answer.

"What do you like at school?"

"Nothing".

I guess it was rather a silly question to ask.

 

Grandma's Hash name is Smash so potato based names were murmurred including Dolphin/Dauphinoise. Eventually the Hash settled on Miss Mash. Miss Mash sensibly selects a half pint of water. Our Songmeister is called upon for a ditty. I think it is Twenty Toes. The water disappears amazingly quickly and is followed by Miss Mash's Hash anointment.

 

There are so many Down-Downs left that we have to award another run badge. This time it is a 300 run badge and the thoroughly deserving recipient is Beefy. His second of the evening. Pork Torpedo finds another ditty and we move onto the final beer.

 

This has to go to guest of honour, Sparky. "Raise your glasses to the memory of Winfield". Sparky takes the last water leaving a solitary half pint.

 

There has to be a story, thus untold. Of course there is. We have an imposter in our midst.

"Smellie? Can you enlighten all gathered here this evening as to your competence as a swimmer?"

"I sink like a stone", answers Smellie.

 

"Stand up and show everyone what you are wearing".

 

Smellie is wearing a T-shirt emblazoned with just two words in bold yellow capitals...."LIFE GUARD". Accordingly, the final half goes to Smellie for impersonating a life guard who cannot swim.

We thank pub for the beer, six half pints of ale and 3 glasses of water for the drivers, and wend our way home. A convivial evening of which I'm sure Winfield would have approved.

 

Next week

Next week's Hash is currently advertised as being from the Kestor Inn, Manaton, with Poacher and Compo Haring. However, this may be subject to last minute change so please keep up to date on the TVH3 Facebook page and/or the Hash Diary which can be found at the swh3.info website.

 

On-On to next week. MP

WINFIELD'S MEMORIAL HASH

Run #2044 Monday 7th October 7:15 pm circle up from Cofton Holiday Park, Starcross, Exeter EX6 8RP

WINFIELD'S MEMORIAL HASH with Coldtits and Polyfella

OD Amelia's Pantry on site.

 

Winfield loved holidaying on cruise ships and the run will be a fancy dress run and the theme will, accordingly, be cruising. Dig-out that sun cream lotion and your life jackets!