#1743 Lustleigh Monday 21st
May 2018 Scribe SMEllie
On the way to the hash I had a feeling it was
going to be something pretty special and I wasn’t disappointed. OMG
Lustleigh is so chocolate box it would put the milk tray man out of
business!
We circled up outside the Cleave – a beautiful old pub with lovely verdant gardens. Apparently the more unruly elements of the hash had got us banned on our last visit. A name was mentioned (squealers) – Mavis -Though I am sure he had accomplices. Anyhow what a venue!
There was a good turnout – 40 hashers and a fair variety of hounds. Teapot was disappointed to find his horn not working. I noticed the men of the hash weren’t coming to his aid with offers of Viagra. Maybe they were saving them for the sweetie stop? Piltdown warned us to be on our ‘bestest’ behavior and over to the hares Soapy and Melon Picker who sent us off on our way. Wait! What’s that coming over the hill? It’s Coldtits. Just in time and sporting a Pillock Tshirt, she’s a brave lady.
On trail I caught up with Soapy who was telling me about her sweetie stop cyclist stalker earlier that day. She had a dilemma about whether A) he thought she was littering when she went to hide the sweets or B) he’d eaten them all and there wouldn’t be any left! Mmm… Never trust a Basher!
At the sweetie stop our fears were allayed. In fact – bonus! The FRB’s had got in a muddle and ended up on the short. Oh dear! More sweets for me then and a chance for us slower longs to bask in the glory of FRBness for a while.
Meanwhile on the short (not the one the true FRB’s gate-crashed) Piltdown I hear, led everyone astray by ignoring the arrows on purpose. There really is no hope then! Forrest also took tumble, but as always appeared unscathed and led the way.
The rest of the trail I spent saying wow at all the beautiful scenery and houses and wondering if there were any eligible bachelors in the village. Or that maybe some kind benefactor would buy me a cottage here. Hey Ho! Back to reality and the pub.
Oh dear Teapot is still having trouble with his horn. The wine gums clearly didn’t hit the spot! Wide Receiver thanked the pub for taking a risk and debarring us.
Down Downs went to Manpig eventually, after a squabble about who led who astray at the front of the trail. Personally I don’t think any of them need much encouragement but it all ended in a deer stalker and a song about fairies? Cold Tits awarded Hot Lips the Pillock t-shirt as he was found loitering in the ladies loo at the beginning of the trail. He didn’t protest much! Hares Soapy and Melon Picker between them scored a hat trick being awarded DD’s for a birthday, 600 runs and a 3rd Wedding Anniversary, Surely no one can top that?
The final DD’s went to the Wet brothers for unrelated misdemeanors. The Wet ‘Johnny’ was heard propositioning the barman for a ‘couple of inches’! I thought the idea was we were supposed to be on our best behaviour? The other ‘Wet’ Fart came up trumps so to speak and shamelessly retorted he wasn’t bothered. He was then very kindly given a hat by Forrest as his previous head apparel had done 6 years’ service. Me thinks new pants may also be in order.
All in all a beautiful trail and fun night. I’m looking forward to running here again.
ON ON to Mon 28th May at The Manor Inn Galmpton TQ5 0NL Hare: Mouldy Dick
At the Sweet STOP! ...where very few stopped!
We circled up outside the Cleave – a beautiful old pub with lovely verdant gardens. Apparently the more unruly elements of the hash had got us banned on our last visit. A name was mentioned (squealers) – Mavis -Though I am sure he had accomplices. Anyhow what a venue!
There was a good turnout – 40 hashers and a fair variety of hounds. Teapot was disappointed to find his horn not working. I noticed the men of the hash weren’t coming to his aid with offers of Viagra. Maybe they were saving them for the sweetie stop? Piltdown warned us to be on our ‘bestest’ behavior and over to the hares Soapy and Melon Picker who sent us off on our way. Wait! What’s that coming over the hill? It’s Coldtits. Just in time and sporting a Pillock Tshirt, she’s a brave lady.
On trail I caught up with Soapy who was telling me about her sweetie stop cyclist stalker earlier that day. She had a dilemma about whether A) he thought she was littering when she went to hide the sweets or B) he’d eaten them all and there wouldn’t be any left! Mmm… Never trust a Basher!
At the sweetie stop our fears were allayed. In fact – bonus! The FRB’s had got in a muddle and ended up on the short. Oh dear! More sweets for me then and a chance for us slower longs to bask in the glory of FRBness for a while.
Meanwhile on the short (not the one the true FRB’s gate-crashed) Piltdown I hear, led everyone astray by ignoring the arrows on purpose. There really is no hope then! Forrest also took tumble, but as always appeared unscathed and led the way.
The rest of the trail I spent saying wow at all the beautiful scenery and houses and wondering if there were any eligible bachelors in the village. Or that maybe some kind benefactor would buy me a cottage here. Hey Ho! Back to reality and the pub.
Oh dear Teapot is still having trouble with his horn. The wine gums clearly didn’t hit the spot! Wide Receiver thanked the pub for taking a risk and debarring us.
Down Downs went to Manpig eventually, after a squabble about who led who astray at the front of the trail. Personally I don’t think any of them need much encouragement but it all ended in a deer stalker and a song about fairies? Cold Tits awarded Hot Lips the Pillock t-shirt as he was found loitering in the ladies loo at the beginning of the trail. He didn’t protest much! Hares Soapy and Melon Picker between them scored a hat trick being awarded DD’s for a birthday, 600 runs and a 3rd Wedding Anniversary, Surely no one can top that?
The final DD’s went to the Wet brothers for unrelated misdemeanors. The Wet ‘Johnny’ was heard propositioning the barman for a ‘couple of inches’! I thought the idea was we were supposed to be on our best behaviour? The other ‘Wet’ Fart came up trumps so to speak and shamelessly retorted he wasn’t bothered. He was then very kindly given a hat by Forrest as his previous head apparel had done 6 years’ service. Me thinks new pants may also be in order.
All in all a beautiful trail and fun night. I’m looking forward to running here again.
ON ON to Mon 28th May at The Manor Inn Galmpton TQ5 0NL Hare: Mouldy Dick
At the Sweet STOP! ...where very few stopped!
