A WARM WELCOME FROM TVH3

Welcome to the Teign Valley Hash House Harriers of glorious South Devon. You are guaranteed a warm welcome and a great hash experience. We are the 'Party Hash' and we run from pubs all over Torbay, Dartmoor and the Teign Valley every Monday evening at 7.15pm. Our trails are marked with flour, chalk or sawdust and take in woodland, streams, byways, bridle paths and rolling countryside. We cater for all abilities, you needn't worry about keeping up, a leisurely walk with others or a good paced run if you're fit - you choose. The run duration is anything from 30 minutes to an hour and the distance is normally between 3-6 miles depending on whether you decide to take a short or long trail. Your first run is free, so come along and give it a go! After the run hashers enjoy a drink and food in the pub. On many occasions, the pub will lay on a 'Hash Menu', food specially for hashers.

WHAT TO EXPECT AT YOUR FIRST HASH

Starts soon after 7:15 pm each Monday.
The Grandmaster will gather the hash together in a circle and welcome Virgins & Visitors to TVH3 and inform the group of pertinent news or upcoming events.
Hares will announce details or the trail, number of long and short splits and regroups.

Down-Downs - sometimes at the circle but usually in the pub after the run. Hashers and harriets (lady hashers) have a half pint and under age hashers have a soft drink or water. If you are driving, just ask the RA for water.

A Down-Down is a means of punishing, rewarding, or merely recognizing an individual for any action or behavior. Once awarded, the downdown must be drunk without pause, otherwise the RA may take action!

Individuals may be recognized for outstanding service, or for their status as a visitor or newcomer.

Down-Downs also serve as punishment for misdemeanours real, imagined, or blatantly made up.

Such transgressions may include: wearing new shoes, pointing with a finger, or the use of real names rather than hash names.

Hash Names

The use of real names (nerd name) during an event is discouraged, and members are typically given a new "hash name," usually in deference to a particularly notorious escapade, a personality trait, or their physical appearance.

Members are named after attending the hash on several occasions or if something noteworthy occurs to prompt a naming.

Other hashers may share stories or observations about the individual, with the final name being chosen by general consensus from all suggestions put forward by the hash.

NEWCOMERS TO THE HASH
Completely new to hashing? Don't know what to expect? Worried, shy or nervous? You needn't be as all newcomers or virgins as they are known, will receive a warm welcome. When the hashers are called to make a circle - about 7:15 pm each Monday, the Grand Master will welcome all hashers and after various notices about forthcoming events etc are dealt with, he will ask if there are any visitors from other hashes or virgins present. You will be asked to come forward and be introduced to the hash. A tip to remember, don't wear new trainers as these are frowned upon by the RA (Religious Advisor) and will incur a sprinkling of flour over them. That's all there is to it and you can then step back and enjoy the run and the social get together after in the On Down (the pub). Whatever your pace, there are certain to be others who will keep you company along the trail. Walk, jog or run - it's up to you.
Hashing is all about making friends and having fun, so just turn up any Monday and have a go.

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TWO HEROES, A WEREWOLF & A YETI

Run #1766 Monday 29th October: Seven Stars at Kennford. Hares Piltdown & Georgy P Orgy

The Seven Stars at Kennford - Kennford? That's a tad far out, oh Grandest One and it has turned chilly to boot Bertie..

However, Trevor, Winfield messaged that he wasn't exactly on 'cruise' control so I was forced to risk it and go as a werewolf. Soapy would back me up, Shirley, so I wouldn't look a complete idiot...

I dimly recall clogged up Kennford, so I arrived a day early to secure a chariot space. HA! There was Beefy and he was also going to risk it on his RocknRolla ankle. 69 and Avatar persuaded me to go inside the Seven Stars to keep warm but the locals looked at me as though I was an Idiot ... sigh.

The chariots arrived and the great host scattered in search of elusive spaces. White van men U Bend and Piddler briefly gazed at the congested carnage outside the pub and drove on.

Thirty two hashers and an assortment of hounds eventually made the circle outside the Seven Stars and only the Grand Master backed me up with that Tommy Cooper black wig - just like that!

The GM welcomed us with the glad tidings that, mercifully, there was no question this week and then introduced a virgin, Sherelle, for the pack's perusal. Another Parkee and at this rate they'll need a minibus. Welcome indeed, the more the merrier.

Now to the important part of every circle banter - the trail details which this week were a little different Doris. The short was 2.83 miles, the long 5.63 and there was also a 'wimp out' trail from the long of 4.7 miles. The pack would stay together for two thirds of a mile and then the longs and shorts would say goodbye forever Forest AND NO SS! I liked it, I liked it!

An alien terrain (well, for me anyway) greeted us as we climbed out of Kennford and headed for open country. Past the point of no return at the only L/S split and the warriors sorted themselves out. Wide Receiver led our select gathering, closely tracked by Manopause and Manpig. Breathing through the werewolf mask was not recommended and I had to remove it to stay in the action (yes, you were right Wide). An unwelcome feature of the hill and dale trail was the four step stile system and Manpig and I lost ground at each one as the youthful elements coursed onwards, ever onwards.

The first adventure occurred just before the great wimp out point. Wide's headtorch could be seen below us but Manpig, Manopause and I were trapped in a field above and a great deal of shouting broke out (from guess who?). Manpig and Manopause surrendered and backtracked to the previous check to be on trail again but, a nameless one chose another option. Finding a gap in the hedge and jumping a water filled ditch, the cry of triumph echoed across the valley. Half a mile away, Beefy heard and sighed in resignation. And there was Piltdown, shining his headtorch like a beacon, guiding us to glory.

Meanwhile, some way back and cautiously testing the ankle, Beefy had let the longs steal a march and he found himself detached from the action. Last of the longs on trail and with the ankle not coping well with field and furrow, Beefy would be out there for some time - more on his travails later.

The pattern of the longs had now been set. Wide was well away and would solo to the finish. Manopause, Manpig and BB would duke it out, on and off while Piddler and the Yeti* would drift back and forth, always maintaining contact.

We learnt much later (in the pub) that Archangel, arriving late, had also set out onto the long trail making eight takers or a quarter of the hash having a go-go dance.

The Band of Brothers plus a relentlessly fluorescing Yeti pressed on, crossing the M5, A30 and A38, taking in many wondrous vistas and unknown territory along the way. Piddler entertained with his offering of 'She was only the Abominable Snowman's daughter, Yet I loved her...' No?

Piddler's tech showed that we covered 6.3 miles in all so had only gone off trail by about 700 metres and time flew as we had such fun out there.

The Seven Stars, rarely visited by TVH was welcoming and the Seven Stars session ale 3.7 abv (£3.50 a pint) hit the spot every time, didn't it Only Here, or were you on the Jail? The house pizza challenge defeated all comers - a half pizza at £8.50 a throw was a magnificent sight. Shitfaced managed a quarter of a quarter: 'It's the thickness of the pizza dough that defeats you.' I begged a portion off Wide and it was a winner. Doggy bags galore were the order of the evening.

DDs were awarded by Wide
A case of mistaken identity as Roxanne was selected as the miscreant who had admitted following BB on trail - corrected to Manopause and trust me, that lad can really moto moto.
A saga by Manpig who teased and prevaricated, apparently nominating SM Ellie for the dazzling Yeti jacket and then yon virgin, Sherelle for wearing a clean pair of shoes before, finally dearly beloved, giving the ruddy hat to Slip on Me for her comment to Only Here 'You mustn't worry, Archangel is far more experienced than you!'
A birthday DD for I-Poo'd followed plus a cake offering from T Humper.
Most reluctantly (still forlornly awaiting Archangel and Beefy to return) Slip on Me awarded the Hashit shirt to Only Here for the Beer for being only here for the beer.

POSTSCRIPT
Yes, they eventually returned to a welcome fit for heroes. Beefy after going the Wang Wei** - made the Matford roundabout before retracing his footsteps and recording just short of eight miles. Archangel recovered from some dodgy kicked out checks to get round in his own time.
The trail was, in my opinion, a great one and very well thought out by the hares. It took in all terrains, was hilly and demanding just as I like them and I am so glad I didn't miss it. And do you know what? I would have actually paid for the privilege of running that trail! Thanks GM and Georgy.

*Aka SM Ellie, that jacket really dazzled!
**Hainan Island incident April 1, 2001

ON ON to next week and Forest Stump's Firework Extravaganza from Tinkley Bottom, Trusham.

TVH3 HABERDASHERY LINK

NEW MISMANAGEMENT & CONTACT TELS.

Grand Master Shitfaced mobile 07973 682201
Vice G M Winfield mobile 07855355338
On Sec Piltdown Man mobile 07773038756
R A Organiser Teapot
R A Manpig
R A Forrest Stump
R A Fallen Woman
Hash Cash Threesome
Hash Tax Satnav
Trail Raiser Doris
Haberdashery Zoot
Song Master Pork Torpedo
Social Sec T. Humper
Spider /Web Bluebird
Life President Pottsie
Vice President K C

HASH SUBS

HASH SUBS £25 and for your assistance you can now use the BACS payment system to pay please.
Details as follows.... Hash Account number 69068186 Sort code 55-70-01 NOTE you must use your HASH NAME as a reference. Many thanks Three-Some & Satnav

JESSE'S DD FROM THE TALLY HO!

EXPLANATION OF ARCHIVE TVH3 SITES

GREATHASHGOD: A dedicated site (presently mothballed and serves as archive content only) with all TVH3 content. Mostly photos from each Monday's hash but also some video clips. Named after our Life President Pottsie.

PRECONDEROTOUS: Containing the entire archive of TVH3 of some 1000 vid clips and over 5000 posts and photos. Started on November 11th 2007, the site is active with Bluebird's personal content but the archive content is fascinating and preserved, well worth a look.

Fukarwi

Fukarwi

REARENDER

REARENDER

TEAPOT

TEAPOT

SOAPY

SOAPY

MOULDY DICK

MOULDY DICK

MELONPICKER

MELONPICKER

FALLEN WOMAN

FALLEN WOMAN

DORIS

DORIS

BROKEN MAN

BROKEN MAN

ARCHANGEL

ARCHANGEL

ABLE SEMEN

ABLE SEMEN

Previously unreleased clip - Vicky's naming from the Sea Trout

FOR TVH3 HABERDASHERY CONTACT ZOOT

FOR TVH3 HABERDASHERY CONTACT ZOOT

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