A WARM WELCOME FROM TVH3

Welcome to the Teign Valley Hash House Harriers of glorious South Devon. You are guaranteed a warm welcome and a great hash experience. We are the 'Party Hash' and we run from pubs all over Torbay, Dartmoor and the Teign Valley every Monday evening at 7.15pm. Our trails are marked with flour, chalk or sawdust and take in woodland, streams, byways, bridle paths and rolling countryside. We cater for all abilities, you needn't worry about keeping up, a leisurely walk with others or a good paced run if you're fit - you choose. The run duration is anything from 30 minutes to an hour and the distance is normally between 3-6 miles depending on whether you decide to take a short or long trail. Your first run is free, so come along and give it a go! After the run hashers enjoy a drink and food in the pub. On many occasions, the pub will lay on a 'Hash Menu', food specially for hashers.

WHAT TO EXPECT AT YOUR FIRST HASH

Starts soon after 7:15 pm each Monday.
The Grandmaster will gather the hash together in a circle and welcome Virgins & Visitors to TVH3 and inform the group of pertinent news or upcoming events.
Hares will announce details or the trail, number of long and short splits and regroups.

Down-Downs - sometimes at the circle but usually in the pub after the run. Hashers and harriets (lady hashers) have a half pint and under age hashers have a soft drink or water. If you are driving, just ask the RA for water.

A Down-Down is a means of punishing, rewarding, or merely recognizing an individual for any action or behavior. Once awarded, the downdown must be drunk without pause, otherwise the RA may take action!

Individuals may be recognized for outstanding service, or for their status as a visitor or newcomer.

Down-Downs also serve as punishment for misdemeanours real, imagined, or blatantly made up.

Such transgressions may include: wearing new shoes, pointing with a finger, or the use of real names rather than hash names.

Hash Names

The use of real names (nerd name) during an event is discouraged, and members are typically given a new "hash name," usually in deference to a particularly notorious escapade, a personality trait, or their physical appearance.

Members are named after attending the hash on several occasions or if something noteworthy occurs to prompt a naming.

Other hashers may share stories or observations about the individual, with the final name being chosen by general consensus from all suggestions put forward by the hash.

NEWCOMERS TO THE HASH
Completely new to hashing? Don't know what to expect? Worried, shy or nervous? You needn't be as all newcomers or virgins as they are known, will receive a warm welcome. When the hashers are called to make a circle - about 7:15 pm each Monday, the Grand Master will welcome all hashers and after various notices about forthcoming events etc are dealt with, he will ask if there are any visitors from other hashes or virgins present. You will be asked to come forward and be introduced to the hash. A tip to remember, don't wear new trainers as these are frowned upon by the RA (Religious Advisor) and will incur a sprinkling of flour over them. That's all there is to it and you can then step back and enjoy the run and the social get together after in the On Down (the pub). Whatever your pace, there are certain to be others who will keep you company along the trail. Walk, jog or run - it's up to you.
Hashing is all about making friends and having fun, so just turn up any Monday and have a go.

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A GREAT PHOTO OP AND WHATAMISTAKATOMAKA


Run #1776 Monday 7th January from the Rising Sun at Woodland. Hares Roxanne & Erection ably assisted by Manopause and Wet Johnny.

Paraprick nosed into the Wellington's spacious car park and found a prime space quite easily. Closer inspection revealed a total absence of hashers' chariots and Paraprick checked his watch. A few minutes later and the awful truth sank in. Whatamistakatomaka - though it was a fairly late call by the hares, it was advertised well on FB and website so everyone please make sure you check the venue on the day just in case.

Meanwhile, far away in the land of the Rising Sun*, the jostling for spaces in the car park was apparent even as I approached. The Rising Sun, oh Fukarwi and I remembered it well.. A fleeting decade ago, I had quite easily managed to get us lost in the Woodford depression and we had spent a merry hour or so running back and forth in the lanes trying to find our way home - oh happy days.

I'm rambling again, why didn't you stop me? Back to the action...

The first hash of a brand new year and the usual suspects were flocking together into their crony groups. Manpig, Fukarwi, 69, Bobby, Wigwam, Soapy, Melon Picker, Doris, Piltdown, Teapot, Winfield, SatNav, Coldtits, returnees Fishbait and Knotty, Beefy, Rise N Shine, Mateus Rose, Piddler, Going Down, SM Ellie, the Park crew of Shitfaced, T Humper, Slobbadog and of course the Ipplepenners and hare hosts Roxanne and Erection with supporting Manopause and Wet Johnny plus Will (unnamed for now) and my good self named thirty of the thirty two at the circle I could see. Not sure if Slip on Me was at the circle but she joined us in the pub.

Doris called for February hares and after the usual raucous repartee, the hares were summoned, fronted by Roxanne. The finer points I missed but did remember that the marks were laid on the right before we embarked on the new adventure.

Young bloods Beefy, Manopause and Manpig** and warriors of old, Fukarwi and a resurgent L'Oiseau Bleu shuffled their way to the fore. A notable newcomer also joined us - Will, he of the Teignmouth newsagents and he surprised with his fitness.

Oh joy, they were playing my song, dry roads and on on into the depths of wildest Woodland.

Looking back, the trail of head torches began to string out and soon faded to nothing as the pace lifted. The FRBs were working well, with Beefy, Manopause (back to him later oh Dearly Beloved) and Manpig doing the bulk of the checking whilst we old timers waited patiently to call the ON ON as calls filtered back to us. Beefy was on a helluva roll - four Wong Weis in a row but as the strongest runner on show, he had a good workout making up the lost ground each time.

A mile or so into the run and Fishbait, Knotty and hound, running steadily and strongly, joined the FRBs and the continuing fun. At last Beefy hit pay dirt and once in front, he steadily drew away but his head torch still guided and calls informed.

Hindsight is a wonderful thing and looking back on events, I can now recall Manopause loitering at the checks on the first LS. Unbeknown to us, he had laid this split on the Sunday so was admiring his handiwork en route. I remember at one split asking Manopause to check downhill and he replied coyly 'Isn't that a hash maxim - never check downhill?' Well it was downhill and he knew of course!

We were now on the second long split and were puzzled that checks were kicked out (correctly) in front of us. Beefy and I were fairly certain that we were in front so who dunnit? was the question. We were about to find out as we came off road into a very muddy field and right of way. In front of us we could see head torches waving around and shouts from hashers. And there was poor SM Ellie, caught fast in a particularly sticky mud section. A few yards away, Piddler AHA! was shouting advice!?! He seemed more concerned that Going Down was receding fast into the distance than helping the stricken harriet. Gent that he Shirley is, Beefy stepped in to assist. He was doing fine until some idiot stopped the rescue saying 'Hold it Beefy, we have to have a photo!' WHAT? Beefy let go of SM Ellie who promptly lost her balance and fell backwards into the mudbath! Still, we did get the photo, that's the main thing isn't it? SM Ellie may have thought differently. Safely extricated, SM Ellie and helpers headed across the fields and met with Wet Johnny who directed us to the exit gate and the safe haven of the Rising Sun.
SM Ellie in mud bath
Now you don't want me to just ramble on about the FRBs do you? So at great effort and an exclusive Skype link-up, here is the walkers' account of the trail brought to you by our man on the spot.. wait for it, Heeeeere's Bobby!

Walking group started off as Bobbiball, Melon Picker, Shitfaced plus one (Slobbadog?), Teapot, T Humper and child and Spud. We went down the wrong way on first check so got even further behind. Teapot soon turned back (knew what was good for him). Shitfaced got ahead and then MP got fed up with Spud getting in the way picking up sticks so I became Billy no mates in between MP and Spud. Eventually I ended up doing the endless trudge on my own! MP says he got stuck in the mud - same spot as SM Ellie? Did catch up with Shitfaced when he did not spot a check in the hedge - could this be another form of trail ? That will have to do!

Much later at the stewards enquiry, it transpired that SM Ellie, Going Down and Piddler had mistakenly taken the first short split and then got to the front by resuming the long trail. Knowing all of them, they would have stuck to the long trail by choice.

Beefy recorded the run as 5.9 miles and a run duration of just under an hour. I put 5.0 miles down for my run as Beefy must have covered an extra mile checking!

We had the Rising Sun to ourselves as they had opened specially for us - Mondays being closed. Before entering, I saw SM Ellie outside trying valiantly to clean up from her quagmire encounter. I came to the aid of the party with a pair of Christmas socks from my sister, so at least SM Ellies feet were dry.

DOWNDOWNS WENT TO:
Hares: ROXANNE & ERECTION for some confusing marks!..but forgiven after a great evening!
SLOBADOG: who after admitting eating? horse manure!, now wears the Horse Head hat.
T.HUMPER: Who after suffering from too much partying with "Hash Fag Lil" finds Its still not a dry January!

Now you'll never hear any criticism of hares from this quarter. They all try their little hearts out and are sometimes taken for granted by those who never lay a trail - but I absolutely loved the Ipplepenners' trail - it could have been designed for me, old roadrunner that I used to be.
WELL DONE lads, a triumph!

ON ON to next week and yet another Ipplepenner presentation from the Dartmouth Inn, Totnes and Hare Wet Johnny.

*I don't know why I bother sometimes.
** Anyone twenty years younger than me is a young blood.

TVH3 HABERDASHERY LINK

NEW MISMANAGEMENT & CONTACT TELS.

Grand Master Shitfaced mobile 07973 682201
Vice G M Winfield mobile 07855355338
On Sec Piltdown Man mobile 07773038756
R A Organiser Teapot
R A Manpig
R A Forrest Stump
R A Fallen Woman
Hash Cash Threesome
Hash Tax Satnav
Trail Raiser Doris
Haberdashery Zoot
Song Master Pork Torpedo
Social Sec T. Humper
Spider /Web Bluebird
Life President Pottsie
Vice President K C

HASH SUBS

HASH SUBS £25 and for your assistance you can now use the BACS payment system to pay please.
Details as follows.... Hash Account number 69068186 Sort code 55-70-01 NOTE you must use your HASH NAME as a reference. Many thanks Three-Some & Satnav

JESSE'S DD FROM THE TALLY HO!

EXPLANATION OF ARCHIVE TVH3 SITES

GREATHASHGOD: A dedicated site (presently mothballed and serves as archive content only) with all TVH3 content. Mostly photos from each Monday's hash but also some video clips. Named after our Life President Pottsie.

PRECONDEROTOUS: Containing the entire archive of TVH3 of some 1000 vid clips and over 5000 posts and photos. Started on November 11th 2007, the site is active with Bluebird's personal content but the archive content is fascinating and preserved, well worth a look.

Fukarwi

Fukarwi

REARENDER

REARENDER

TEAPOT

TEAPOT

SOAPY

SOAPY

MOULDY DICK

MOULDY DICK

MELONPICKER

MELONPICKER

FALLEN WOMAN

FALLEN WOMAN

DORIS

DORIS

BROKEN MAN

BROKEN MAN

ARCHANGEL

ARCHANGEL

ABLE SEMEN

ABLE SEMEN

Previously unreleased clip - Vicky's naming from the Sea Trout

FOR TVH3 HABERDASHERY CONTACT ZOOT

FOR TVH3 HABERDASHERY CONTACT ZOOT

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