A WARM WELCOME FROM TVH3

Welcome to the Teign Valley Hash House Harriers of glorious South Devon. You are guaranteed a warm welcome and a great hash experience. We are the 'Party Hash' and we run from pubs all over Torbay, Dartmoor and the Teign Valley every Monday evening at 7.15pm. Our trails are marked with flour, chalk or sawdust and take in woodland, streams, byways, bridle paths and rolling countryside. We cater for all abilities, you needn't worry about keeping up, a leisurely walk with others or a good paced run if you're fit - you choose. The run duration is anything from 30 minutes to an hour and the distance is normally between 3-6 miles depending on whether you decide to take a short or long trail. Your first run is free, so come along and give it a go! After the run hashers enjoy a drink and food in the pub. On many occasions, the pub will lay on a 'Hash Menu', food specially for hashers.

WHAT TO EXPECT AT YOUR FIRST HASH

Starts soon after 7:15 pm each Monday.
The Grandmaster will gather the hash together in a circle and welcome Virgins & Visitors to TVH3 and inform the group of pertinent news or upcoming events.
Hares will announce details or the trail, number of long and short splits and regroups.

Down-Downs - sometimes at the circle but usually in the pub after the run. Hashers and harriets (lady hashers) have a half pint and under age hashers have a soft drink or water. If you are driving, just ask the RA for water.

A Down-Down is a means of punishing, rewarding, or merely recognizing an individual for any action or behavior. Once awarded, the downdown must be drunk without pause, otherwise the RA may take action!

Individuals may be recognized for outstanding service, or for their status as a visitor or newcomer.

Down-Downs also serve as punishment for misdemeanours real, imagined, or blatantly made up.

Such transgressions may include: wearing new shoes, pointing with a finger, or the use of real names rather than hash names.

Hash Names

The use of real names (nerd name) during an event is discouraged, and members are typically given a new "hash name," usually in deference to a particularly notorious escapade, a personality trait, or their physical appearance.

Members are named after attending the hash on several occasions or if something noteworthy occurs to prompt a naming.

Other hashers may share stories or observations about the individual, with the final name being chosen by general consensus from all suggestions put forward by the hash.

NEWCOMERS TO THE HASH
Completely new to hashing? Don't know what to expect? Worried, shy or nervous? You needn't be as all newcomers or virgins as they are known, will receive a warm welcome. When the hashers are called to make a circle - about 7:15 pm each Monday, the Grand Master will welcome all hashers and after various notices about forthcoming events etc are dealt with, he will ask if there are any visitors from other hashes or virgins present. You will be asked to come forward and be introduced to the hash. A tip to remember, don't wear new trainers as these are frowned upon by the RA (Religious Advisor) and will incur a sprinkling of flour over them. That's all there is to it and you can then step back and enjoy the run and the social get together after in the On Down (the pub). Whatever your pace, there are certain to be others who will keep you company along the trail. Walk, jog or run - it's up to you.
Hashing is all about making friends and having fun, so just turn up any Monday and have a go.

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PANZER BOBBY DEFEATED BUT CLAN CHIEF WET JOHNNY TRIUMPHS

Run #1777 Monday 14th January from the Dartmouth Inn, Totnes. Hare: Wet Johnny

Descending past Berry Pomeroy castle en routey for the Dartmouth Inn, a queue of vehicles materialised. Rounding a corner and the cause of the delay could be discerned. No! It could not be! But yes, it was! There at the head of the queue was a Panzerkampfwagen IV tank, resplendent in khaki livery. At the wheel was a snarling Bobbiball who was in uncompromising mood. Down the Totnes hill and over the cobbles of the Plains chugged the beast before turning for the council car park - but, there was a problem. Above the entry gantry was a height restriction board, probably designed for campers, large vans and.. tanks. Bobby's co pilot Wiggster jumped out and surveying the situation called back: 'You'll be okay Bobby, steady as she goes now..' Yes, it might have been doable but for the rangefinder on top of Bobby's Panzer. Five times did the stubborn Bobby edge forward until finally giving best, he reversed from the tank trap and nearly destroyed the vehicles behind. Defeated yes, but still a classic, I salute you!

But I witter on so back to the hash oh Dearly Bemused:

Ah, the Dartmouth Inn, always a popular watering hole for TVH and the roll call was recorded by Teapot as 38, including returnees John and Hannah, All the Way, Whisperer and our own warrior of the ages Rambo. There were also a few alcohol soaked hashers swaying at the circle - more of them later..

Ipplepen Clan Chief Wet Johnny explained the intricacies of his lay and manifold they were: Was it four or five L/S splits? A SS with spice laden cider to warm the cockles and guesstimated distances of 'less than six miles' for the long and fourish miles for the short trail. Marks laid on the right and three and ON ON!

To the sound of Teapot's horn (supported by a birdbrain) the pack dispersed, eager for the fray. The first L/S split appeared a mere hundred metres away. Onto the bridge we surged and to the first check which beckoned and lured the unwary. A goodly number of hashers took the bait and dropped down to the river bank before being called back - curses, foiled so soon. Rejoining the main body, we were unaware that Whisperer, a known FRB, had chosen correctly and had careered away, opening up a big lead. I don't think he would have heeded the old hash chestnut of 'It's not a race'.

The rest of the FRBs comprising Beefy and Poacher/Cider, Manpig, Woof Woof, All the Way, Manopause and the Bird Blue took up station. If only we had stayed on the river bank as lo and behold, we arrived upstream at the Brutus bridge. Down onto the banks of the Dart and towards the industrial estate we rushed and caught up with Manpig, who, most remarkably - given his intake of eight pints the day before* - was still operating, albeit on impulse power only. Manopause and Melon Picker were also inconvenienced by weekend alcohol consumption so were all living up to the hashing maxim 'Drinkers with a running problem'.

Staying to the fore on any hash trail means choosing right at checks - failure to guess correctly quickly shuffles you to the rear and the effort of catching up soon takes its toll, as serial checker Beefy will tell you. The breakaway Whisperer, still on a 'solo' at halfway, finally guessed wrong and was never sighted again, such was the error. Stout runners Will and SM Ellie had also veered off course and became detached from the pack.

Consistently choosing right were Woof Woof and All the Way who kept up a steady pace while chatting away to each other.
Poacher eventually got to the front but was hampered by his hound Cider who was having great difficulty keeping up with his master.

It did seem that we were always taking in hill after hill and Beefy's strava elevation profile shows how severe the ascent was before plunging us back down into the town.

The welcoming light from the back of Wet Johnny's chariot proved to be the SS and as the longs approached down the tarmac, the shorts appeared simultaneously from a track below. Sheer luck or trail triumph? I leave you, dear readers to make judgement though my vote would go to the second named. To keep the pack together, longs and shorts, demands great skill. And it wasn't a single occurrence, as well into the run we had encountered Coldtits, Erection and several other shorts.

From the SS, it was a swift return on flat tracks, open tarmac and the knee jarring descent back to the pub. The trail was enjoyed and praised by the hash. Nice one Wet Johnny!

On offer in the Dartmouth was Dartmoor Jail at a wallet-pleasing £2.50 a pint.

After the DDs, RAd by a still standing Manpig, the hash dispersed - except for the Ipplepenners who, as is their wont, adjourned to the nook in the corner to hold court and of course imbibe a few more bevvies. We were finally given our marching orders by the new barman who didn't really grasp what hashing was all about - perhaps next time..

The 1777th Awards on 14th Jan. were presented to the following Hashers at The Dartmouth Inn,Totnes......
WET JOHNNY: A well deserved DD after a great trail and that warm cider stop.
BOBBIBALL: (Hashit shirt) Now praying for forgiveness after almost demolishing the CP entrance barriers.
PIDDLER: (Substitute Checkin chicken hat) Standing accused of cutting Short again! raises his pinky finger in disgust !
PILTDOWN: (Horsey Horseface hat) With his Birthday DD, but will he drink it all?..."oh yes he will....!"

*Exeter Chiefs game and yes, they won which explains the celebration eight pints.

ON ON to next week and the Wild Goose at Combeinteignhead with Shitfaced.

TVH3 HABERDASHERY LINK

NEW MISMANAGEMENT & CONTACT TELS.

Grand Master Shitfaced mobile 07973 682201
Vice G M Winfield mobile 07855355338
On Sec Piltdown Man mobile 07773038756
R A Organiser Teapot
R A Manpig
R A Forrest Stump
R A Fallen Woman
Hash Cash Threesome
Hash Tax Satnav
Trail Raiser Doris
Haberdashery Zoot
Song Master Pork Torpedo
Social Sec T. Humper
Spider /Web Bluebird
Life President Pottsie
Vice President K C

HASH SUBS

HASH SUBS £25 and for your assistance you can now use the BACS payment system to pay please.
Details as follows.... Hash Account number 69068186 Sort code 55-70-01 NOTE you must use your HASH NAME as a reference. Many thanks Three-Some & Satnav

JESSE'S DD FROM THE TALLY HO!

EXPLANATION OF ARCHIVE TVH3 SITES

GREATHASHGOD: A dedicated site (presently mothballed and serves as archive content only) with all TVH3 content. Mostly photos from each Monday's hash but also some video clips. Named after our Life President Pottsie.

PRECONDEROTOUS: Containing the entire archive of TVH3 of some 1000 vid clips and over 5000 posts and photos. Started on November 11th 2007, the site is active with Bluebird's personal content but the archive content is fascinating and preserved, well worth a look.

Fukarwi

Fukarwi

REARENDER

REARENDER

TEAPOT

TEAPOT

SOAPY

SOAPY

MOULDY DICK

MOULDY DICK

MELONPICKER

MELONPICKER

FALLEN WOMAN

FALLEN WOMAN

DORIS

DORIS

BROKEN MAN

BROKEN MAN

ARCHANGEL

ARCHANGEL

ABLE SEMEN

ABLE SEMEN

Previously unreleased clip - Vicky's naming from the Sea Trout

FOR TVH3 HABERDASHERY CONTACT ZOOT

FOR TVH3 HABERDASHERY CONTACT ZOOT

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