Run # 1780 Monday 4th February at The Park Inn, Kingskerswell Newton Abbot with Hares: Shitfaced & Threesum.
And hallelujah! Got my first question right! Piltdown's question was of the standard gauge (railway) width. Manpig jumped in with 4ft 6 1/2 inches first which prompted my memory to counter with 4 ft 8 1/2 inches. Shared the pint with him. Where were you Beefy? This one was for you.
A host of visitors cum virgins crowded into the circle: Anita (Park barmaid) shepherding three girls and a Polish contingent brought along by returnee hasher Abscess. Co hare Threesum made a welcome return from Pantoville and there was a palpable feeling of excitement in the air.
Recall Teapot announcing that 40 + hashers had made the circle, the number augmented by late arrivals Deep Throat and Grinder and probably just as well that they gave us a head start.
The ever important hare information imparted was of a two L/S split trail, a walkers' trail and a sweetie/mulled cider stop. However, there was an ominous rider: 'It's a runners' trail...' from which the FRBs deduced that it was going to be long and tough - bring it on, the warriors chanted! Brave words - but we didn't appreciate how tough it would be out there and The Long and Winding Road* would Shirley take its toll...
Shitfaced did it again, or rather Poacher and the Bat did it to themselves. Steaming down the hill after the start, they careered up the hill past the first check to encounter the return arrows from the OH! By the time the disgraced duo (+ Cider) had rectified the early blunder**, the FRBs and longs had flown the coop. It would take some time to get back oh Dearly Beloved.
Turning towards the church was another error though checks were still not kicked out and it was catch up time again as we coursed down the side of the Expressway, eventually turning off to cut past the Barn Owl and up across the Newton Road boondocks bound.
At last hashers were sighted up the gravelled Yew Tree Walk flanking the quarry. The Polish crew, then SM Ellie and BroadS were seen and then Mateus Rose without buddy Rise 'n Shine at that point. It was a recurring theme, coming across various shorts and longs all intermixed - a sign of a sound trail lay by the hares.
And there were the chatting pair Woof Woof and All the Way and Poacher explained his Facebook spam episode before we drifted past. Around a corner and there was Coldtits who advised that the SS was yet to come and she was on the short trail - all confusing, but it was that sort of trail, you never knew what was coming next or who was around the next corner. Loved it Shitfaced and Threesum!
As Shitfaced observed, it was a veritable Tour de Pubs, taking in the Barn Owl, Linny, Hare & Hounds and finally, of course, the Park.
BroadS & SM Ellie had a torrid time of it. After missing the right turn down Daccombe Mill Lane, they ploughed straight on past the Linny before back tracking and incurring a mile plus penalty. They both did remarkably well to continue and eventually complete the long trail. Ninety five minutes and 7.65 miles later, they made the welcoming blue glow sign of the Park.
Cruel indeed was the left turn at the bottom of Fluder Hill with the Park just a heartbeat away. Manpig, suffering with a heel blister, ran up the white flag soon after and headed for an early bath (well shower then). Compensation awaited the bravehearted with the welcoming SS cum mulled cider stop chez Threesum.
The trail continued out along the A380 and across into the back lane jungle of wildest Whilborough.
On and on we endured and the petrol gauge blinked red on the Batmobile***. Delusion set in, we would be out here forever. Poacher realising that his running buddy was starting to weave and stagger enquired 'Are you all right mate?' which of course he plainly was not. A bright light appeared astern and suddenly Deep Throat surged past (the bar steward) - clearly on a mission. Into the closing stages and it was now a case of mind over matter - I wasn't going to give in however long the trail. We were joined approaching the blessed OH marker by Ding Dong and Brock and where they had come from goodness knows but we all ran in together, three hashers, Cider and Brock and I know who was Shirley Shattered..
Into the CP they dribbled, Forrest, Fukarwi, Grinder, Woof Woof, All the Way, BroadS, SM Ellie + of course Deep Throat, Poacher and Ding Dong - heroes all**** and Forrest asked how far I thought it was. 'A good six' was my estimate and Forrest thought more like six and a half. Consulting his tech, the legend read 6.53, good judge that lad. An upbeat Winfield was chuffed with running the 'short' trail of over three miles.
The Gun Dog at a wallet friendly £3.30 was the weapon of choice and a hash chilli was on offer. Good to see #69 in the pub - a rare occurrence as he didn't have his usual early start the next day. Think Wiggers was content with the score draw of his Liverpool and Bobby didn't make it as he had an evening in with Vatman.
What a trail and what an evening, quite simply, thank you hares.
One more thing in closing, take good care of my Vampire Bat Manpig - it's not a hash hat yet - still a cherished pet.
The "Awards" from Shitfaced & Threesum's Trail #1780, from The Park Inn Kingskerswell, were presented to the following offenders....
COLDTITZ for suggesting Fukawe should use a strap on his Award hat well.... she will need it now!
MANPIG who nipped home to wash his hair after the Trail!
FUKARWI heard panting heavily chasing after those younger Hashers!
SHITFACED a reward for yet another excellent trail.....
not forgetting Threesums excellent Cider+stop!
*Lennon & McCartney naturally.
**My fault, I was being clever as I had seen marks driving past, Pillock that I Shirley am.
***Come on, I had to do it.
****Apologies if I missed anyone out.
