A WARM WELCOME FROM TVH3

Welcome to the Teign Valley Hash House Harriers of glorious South Devon. You are guaranteed a warm welcome and a great hash experience. We are the 'Party Hash' and we run from pubs all over Torbay, Dartmoor and the Teign Valley every Monday evening at 7.15pm. Our trails are marked with flour, chalk or sawdust and take in woodland, streams, byways, bridle paths and rolling countryside. We cater for all abilities, you needn't worry about keeping up, a leisurely walk with others or a good paced run if you're fit - you choose. The run duration is anything from 30 minutes to an hour and the distance is normally between 3-6 miles depending on whether you decide to take a short or long trail. Your first run is free, so come along and give it a go! After the run hashers enjoy a drink and food in the pub. On many occasions, the pub will lay on a 'Hash Menu', food specially for hashers.

WHAT TO EXPECT AT YOUR FIRST HASH

Starts soon after 7:15 pm each Monday.
The Grandmaster will gather the hash together in a circle and welcome Virgins & Visitors to TVH3 and inform the group of pertinent news or upcoming events.
Hares will announce details or the trail, number of long and short splits and regroups.

Down-Downs - sometimes at the circle but usually in the pub after the run. Hashers and harriets (lady hashers) have a half pint and under age hashers have a soft drink or water. If you are driving, just ask the RA for water.

A Down-Down is a means of punishing, rewarding, or merely recognizing an individual for any action or behavior. Once awarded, the downdown must be drunk without pause, otherwise the RA may take action!

Individuals may be recognized for outstanding service, or for their status as a visitor or newcomer.

Down-Downs also serve as punishment for misdemeanours real, imagined, or blatantly made up.

Such transgressions may include: wearing new shoes, pointing with a finger, or the use of real names rather than hash names.

Hash Names

The use of real names (nerd name) during an event is discouraged, and members are typically given a new "hash name," usually in deference to a particularly notorious escapade, a personality trait, or their physical appearance.

Members are named after attending the hash on several occasions or if something noteworthy occurs to prompt a naming.

Other hashers may share stories or observations about the individual, with the final name being chosen by general consensus from all suggestions put forward by the hash.

NEWCOMERS TO THE HASH
Completely new to hashing? Don't know what to expect? Worried, shy or nervous? You needn't be as all newcomers or virgins as they are known, will receive a warm welcome. When the hashers are called to make a circle - about 7:15 pm each Monday, the Grand Master will welcome all hashers and after various notices about forthcoming events etc are dealt with, he will ask if there are any visitors from other hashes or virgins present. You will be asked to come forward and be introduced to the hash. A tip to remember, don't wear new trainers as these are frowned upon by the RA (Religious Advisor) and will incur a sprinkling of flour over them. That's all there is to it and you can then step back and enjoy the run and the social get together after in the On Down (the pub). Whatever your pace, there are certain to be others who will keep you company along the trail. Walk, jog or run - it's up to you.
Hashing is all about making friends and having fun, so just turn up any Monday and have a go.

Pages (when clicked the item will appear at the bottom of the page - click home to return)

ALL ARE SAFELY GATHERED IN ON AN EVENTFUL EVENING

Run #1849 Monday 19th October from Bovey Tracy CP with hares Beefy and Pisswell
 
I was late, so late, for a most important date as I turned into Bovey. A figure striding purposefully towards the Dolphin - away from the circle CP - caught my (Pop) eye, more on that later.
 
Entering the car park, a goodly number was already gathered by the river, the beautiful the beautiful river, but still below the maximum Judge Dredd requirement in these dystopian times.
 
Circle spotted:
GM Shitfaced, Teapot, Piltdown, Georgie, 3Sum, SatNav, Able, Slip on Me, Well Hopped, Big End & Ned, Screwed & Bella, Fukarwi, Roxanne, Harry, Wet Johnny, Erection, Ravi, SM Ellie, Pisswell, ManPig, Strap-On, BB, Coldtits, Artful Dogger, Beefy, Popeye, Gaga4It, Triple Jump and special guest appearance of Wide Receiver.
 
A pleasant surprise to see Wide Receiver back with us once more, but little time to chat as circle up was imminent. But wait, that's Popeye loitering in a tent* across the road and I know it's early, but singalong with me to the Coasters smash hit of '57 if you please:
 
(𝑮𝒐𝒏𝒏𝒂 𝒇𝒊𝒏𝒅 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒎**)
𝑨-𝒂 𝒔𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒄𝒉𝒊𝒏'
𝑶𝒉, 𝒚𝒆𝒂𝒉, 𝒔𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒄𝒉𝒊𝒏' 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒚 𝒘𝒉𝒊𝒄𝒉 𝒂-𝒘𝒂𝒚
𝒀𝒆𝒂𝒉, 𝒚𝒆𝒂𝒉
𝑶𝒉, 𝒚𝒆𝒂𝒉, 𝒔𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒄𝒉𝒊𝒏'
𝑰'𝒎 𝒔𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒄𝒉𝒊𝒏'
𝑺𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒄𝒉𝒊𝒏' 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒚 𝒘𝒉𝒊𝒄𝒉 𝒂-𝒘𝒂𝒚...
 
Yes, Oh Dearly Named and Shamed, Popeye was a searchin' for the Land Ho! circle but after a few bird calls from the car park, eventually joined our ranks... really Popeye, we thought you were one of us not one of...
 
And, Oh Dearly Confusion May Reigneth, there were two overlapping trails out there in the Bovey boondocks but never mind, Beefy had a cunning plan which was to be executed with remarkable precision. I know, hashes are not renowned for going right, but this was to be the exception that proves the rule, Rodney.
 
Contact had been made with Beefy's opposite number at Land Ho! and a campaign plan was hatched. TVH marks were a single dot and t'other one would have a double dot. Justatomakasura Shirley, all checks were suspended with arrows substituted. Hashers with caveman IQ's struggled to comprehend the complexities of the enterprise and Pete Tong nodded sadly.
 
Two L/S splits and a longish long of six miles and a bit with supporting short and hiking trails and, without further ado, Beefy dropped the chequered flag.
 
With the pep talk still being digested, the pack Hit the Road Jack [sic] and now comes the tricky bit which, doubtless, a few will be interested in, Oh Dearly How Can I Get Out of This...
 
Wide was on rails early doors and on the bunny through the unlikely chicanes pursued by Artful. Onto the B3344 Highway to Heaven and the Nike Epic Reacts*** were a joy - though a recent knee niggle was hampering engaging top gear - love it ,safari so good... BUT
 
An arrow of Ultimate Doom pointed down into an unappetizing and apparently muddy lane and the Bird, still undergoing therapy from the previous week, was loathe to leave the safety of the tarmac. Wet Johnny was bringing up the rear and enquired if all was well with the Bird who had now gone a Whiter Shade of Pale. But now I must hand you over to the hash proper while I try and make up a good story..
 
The pack dutifully descended into the black hole, turned left across two fields and were regurgitated back onto the main road three hundred yards along. Wide and Artful had flown the coop but the advance party of longs comprising Wet Johnny, Big End, Well Hopped, Fukarwi and Erection came across a very surprised hasher who could not believe his eyes and promptly fell to the ground, a foaming at the mouth. Oh Deary Me..
 
Convinced he was back on trail, the Bird flew [sic] down the road while the scouting party - equally convinced that the Bird had finally cracked - turned back to explore other more attractive avenues [sic]...
 
No marks, no marks, was the result and the Bird was now in quite a quandary. On his lonesome, he raised the white flag and retraced his faltering footsteps. Nothing! Not a sausage! Back to the right-minded...
 
A panel of red warning lights flashed on Artful's dash and after making the only real hill summit, he decided to abandon his burnt-out Ferrari and freewheeled forlornly back down into Bovey for an early bath. He only just missed intersecting with a (by now) very desperate Bird who was playing his final card to get back in the game.
 
A tiny blob of flour at the fire station roundabout gave hope that the trail would cross the Moretonhampstead road at some point and six turn-offs (all carefully inspected) later, a glorious arrow of redemption was sighted on the right hand side. That's handy Harry, pop it in the oven****..
 
Only just in time as Wide appeared some way in front of the next hasher, Wet Johnny, who had gradually moved through the pack. Then ManPig arrived and went on his lonely way. Several minutes later, merry banter could be heard and the Fukarwi styled 'touring club' crossed the road - namely Fukarwi, Popeye, Big End, Ned and Well Hopped.
 
Two hundred yards later, we came upon ManPig who had been studiously examining the vegetation for some time, looking for clues....sigh
 
Hashing proper got underway and the trail led us into the East Dartmoor woods of Beefy's realm. Hash calls could be heard from Land Ho! and ManPig called back to let them know that TVH were here and about to join the party. Did you hear us Grinder? I know you're there, so don't try and hide.
 
Ah, familiar territory and the tiny marks were intuitive as we toured the riverside trails and it was going swimmingly until the (Wong Wei) railway road chugged into view and the first sighting of the dread double dots.
 
And then it all kicked off Arry. A weird combination of Mad Max vehicles and figures, tricycles, motorized lawnmowers, mopeds and quad bikes came charging down the old railway line towards the bemused duo of ManPig and the Bird. Yes, Land Ho! were having a hoot in the woods, hereabouts and thereabouts.
 
Also having a 'hoot' was Coldtits on her usual nocturnal investigations en routey, listening for owls, spotting bats and mushrooms. Remember, a hash is many things to hashers and it's not all about cavorting around racking up Grand Prix points.
 
A casualty of the trail was Strap-On (which curiously reads backwards: No-Parts) who took a tumble and was later found to have fractured a metatarsal which will necessitate a few weeks off running. Beefy was sweeping the trail and was able to direct a limping Strap-On the quickest way back to base.
 
Another adventure was panning out farther back on the trail as Screwed and Bella somehow took the last long split and came across Roxanne - whether son Harry was with them is not clear as we encountered the little lad in the car park and he didn't seem to know where dear old dad was - answers on a postcard please.
 
Homeward bound we spotted the Land Ho! chariot tether in Parke and they shouted encouragement as we passed. Despite my unfortunate 'detour' I recorded 6.26 miles - about the same as those that did the official trail.
 
The Bell or the Dolphin? We preferred the Bell but as time was pressing, opted for the Dolphin and entering from the front, failed to spot the 'No Entry' sign and we were gently chided by the staff. After registering our life histories, there was just ninety seconds to get the drinks in but at least we got some beer, unlike the hare..
 
*No? Well...
**Land Ho! of course.
***Sadly still no trail shoes at the moment
****Loved that advert back in the day when a pizza carton landed on the table from on high.
 
𝐏𝐎𝐒𝐓𝐒𝐂𝐑𝐈𝐏𝐓
All in all, a most eventful evening, what with the overlapping trails; the howler of a mistake early trail by someone who should know better; the fall and injury of Strap-On - fortunately not too serious; the accidental foray onto the last long by Screwed and Bella and a rather well thought out trail by the hare which combined virgin urban sprawl with ideal hashing trail territory in the woods.
 
As you know, the usual closing thoughts are recognition and thanks for the work undertaken by our hare(s) on the night, but Beefy and Pisswell's efforts were exceptional. Planning, laying and sweeping were executed faultlessly and the sight of the hares entering and leaving the Dolphin without having the opportunity to at least have a drink was disappointing and no reward for their joint efforts. I'll get you a beer next week! ManPig and I waited for you in the car park, Beefy and we only just got in before the last orders at 9:15 pm. Never mind, we all knew how well you both had done - thank you from everyone Beefy and Pisswell.
 
𝗢𝗡 𝗢𝗡 with hope in our hearts to next Monday from the welcoming Park Inn at Kingskerswell with Hare: I-Poo'd.

HASH SUBS

HASH SUBS £25 and for your assistance you can now use the BACS payment system to pay please.
Details as follows.... Hash Account number 69068186 Sort code 55-70-01 NOTE you must use your HASH NAME as a reference. Many thanks Three-Some & Satnav

TVH3 HABERDASHERY LINK

NEW MISMANAGEMENT & CONTACT TELS.

Grand Master Shitfaced mobile 07973 682201
Vice G M Winfield mobile 07855355338
On Sec Piltdown Man mobile 07773038756
R A Organiser Teapot
R A Manpig
R A Forrest Stump
R A Fallen Woman
Hash Cash Threesome
Hash Tax Satnav
Trail Raiser Doris
Haberdashery Zoot
Song Master Pork Torpedo
Social Sec T. Humper
Spider /Web Bluebird
Life President Pottsie
Vice President K C sadly not with us

JESSE'S DD FROM THE TALLY HO!

EXPLANATION OF ARCHIVE TVH3 SITES

GREATHASHGOD: A dedicated site (presently mothballed and serves as archive content only) with all TVH3 content. Mostly photos from each Monday's hash but also some video clips. Named after our Life President Pottsie.

PRECONDEROTOUS: Containing the entire archive of TVH3 of some 1000 vid clips and over 5000 posts and photos. Started on November 11th 2007, the site is active with Bluebird's personal content but the archive content is fascinating and preserved, well worth a look.

Fukarwi

Fukarwi

REARENDER

REARENDER

TEAPOT

TEAPOT

SOAPY

SOAPY

MOULDY DICK

MOULDY DICK

MELONPICKER

MELONPICKER

FALLEN WOMAN

FALLEN WOMAN

DORIS

DORIS

BROKEN MAN

BROKEN MAN

ARCHANGEL

ARCHANGEL

ABLE SEMEN

ABLE SEMEN

Previously unreleased clip - Vicky's naming from the Sea Trout

FOR TVH3 HABERDASHERY CONTACT ZOOT

FOR TVH3 HABERDASHERY CONTACT ZOOT

CTRL HTML MY REF.

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