A WARM WELCOME FROM TVH3

Welcome to the Teign Valley Hash House Harriers of glorious South Devon. You are guaranteed a warm welcome and a great hash experience. We are the 'Party Hash' and we run from pubs all over Torbay, Dartmoor and the Teign Valley every Monday evening at 7.15pm. Our trails are marked with flour, chalk or sawdust and take in woodland, streams, byways, bridle paths and rolling countryside. We cater for all abilities, you needn't worry about keeping up, a leisurely walk with others or a good paced run if you're fit - you choose. The run duration is anything from 30 minutes to an hour and the distance is normally between 3-6 miles depending on whether you decide to take a short or long trail. Your first run is free, so come along and give it a go! After the run hashers enjoy a drink and food in the pub. On many occasions, the pub will lay on a 'Hash Menu', food specially for hashers.

WHAT TO EXPECT AT YOUR FIRST HASH

Starts soon after 7:15 pm each Monday.
The Grandmaster will gather the hash together in a circle and welcome Virgins & Visitors to TVH3 and inform the group of pertinent news or upcoming events.
Hares will announce details or the trail, number of long and short splits and regroups.

Down-Downs - sometimes at the circle but usually in the pub after the run. Hashers and harriets (lady hashers) have a half pint and under age hashers have a soft drink or water. If you are driving, just ask the RA for water.

A Down-Down is a means of punishing, rewarding, or merely recognizing an individual for any action or behavior. Once awarded, the downdown must be drunk without pause, otherwise the RA may take action!

Individuals may be recognized for outstanding service, or for their status as a visitor or newcomer.

Down-Downs also serve as punishment for misdemeanours real, imagined, or blatantly made up.

Such transgressions may include: wearing new shoes, pointing with a finger, or the use of real names rather than hash names.

Hash Names

The use of real names (nerd name) during an event is discouraged, and members are typically given a new "hash name," usually in deference to a particularly notorious escapade, a personality trait, or their physical appearance.

Members are named after attending the hash on several occasions or if something noteworthy occurs to prompt a naming.

Other hashers may share stories or observations about the individual, with the final name being chosen by general consensus from all suggestions put forward by the hash.

NEWCOMERS TO THE HASH
Completely new to hashing? Don't know what to expect? Worried, shy or nervous? You needn't be as all newcomers or virgins as they are known, will receive a warm welcome. When the hashers are called to make a circle - about 7:15 pm each Monday, the Grand Master will welcome all hashers and after various notices about forthcoming events etc are dealt with, he will ask if there are any visitors from other hashes or virgins present. You will be asked to come forward and be introduced to the hash. A tip to remember, don't wear new trainers as these are frowned upon by the RA (Religious Advisor) and will incur a sprinkling of flour over them. That's all there is to it and you can then step back and enjoy the run and the social get together after in the On Down (the pub). Whatever your pace, there are certain to be others who will keep you company along the trail. Walk, jog or run - it's up to you.
Hashing is all about making friends and having fun, so just turn up any Monday and have a go.

A SHIRLEY VALENTINE (1989)* HASH

INSPIRED HARES & FINE CHOCOLATES

by Man-Pig
 
Run #1904 Monday 14th February from the Palk Arms at Hennock
 
HARES: Melon-Picker & Soapy
 
Who wuz there: Melon-Picker, Soapy, Shitfaced, Piltdown Man, Georgy-Porgy, Cheerio-Beerio, Hotlips, Zoot, Forrest-Stump (pubee) , Teapot, Wetfart, Beefy, Well-Hopped, Ned, Swinger, Wet-Johnny, Manopause, Erection, Broadshit, Coldtits, Man-Pig, Fallen Woman, Able, Rambo, returnees UB, Notty and virgins Sarah, Andy and Jacqui.
 
Who wuzn't: apologies from Bluebird and Bobbiball, Smellie (Covid)
 
THE CIRCLE
It's been a while since we last ran from the Palk Arms. In the daylight it has the most stunning of views over the Teign Valley. However, even with a clear night and an almost full moon, the views were lost from sight. Cue a hash from here in the summer so that we can appreciate the scenery. Sunday's weather had been atrocious and the temperature had dropped throughout the day on Monday. How many would turn up? A goodly number, 27 all told - including two returnees and three virgins.
 
Teapot welcomed virgins Sarah (works at Hennock primary school) and Andy (took the King's shilling at the Park Inn courtesy of Shitfaced and was duly press-ganged unto turning up) into the circle. Both were anointed in the traditional manner - with a liberal dusting of flour. Sarah almost got nominated for a down-down before we'd even started the trail. Accused of having "new shoes", she replied, "I've only just cleaned them!"......in this weather?
 
Shitfaced gave us a quick plug for the distillery tour on 26 February and then it was the spiel from the Hares: "Walkers' trail about 2 miles - but have your sweeties now as you will miss the sweetie-stop. Shorts about three and a half. Longs five. Three Long/Short splits. There is a sweetie-stop". A little confusion as to whether the marks were on the left or the right. It was concluded that the marks could be either.
 
THE TRAIL
Man-Pig led the charge as the Hares directed us back down Church Lane, through the village and past the primary school to the first Long/Shorts and Walkers split. The Longs went left down a footpath last used by the Walkers on Forrest's Firework Hash trail. The Walkers and the Shorts continued down to Five Lanes Junction where the Hares directed them up the muddy footpath known as Beacon Lane. I am assuming that Beacon Lane is so called because it had a signal beacon at it's highest point to warn of the attempted invasion by the Spanish Armada. If anyone knows any different, answers on a postcard please.
 
HARES INSPIRED
Beacon Lane rejoins tarmac at Chericombehead where, yet again, the Hare was waiting for us. This was another five way junction and afforded a natural point at which to direct the Longs, Shorts and Walkers onto different trails - how inspired is that?
 
POUNDSHOP SHARES PLUMMET
Melonpicker directed the Longs left towards Shaptor Cross. The Walkers went right and straight down Bell Lane and back to the pub. The Shorts was almost straight across and a long downhill canter along Beadon Lane to the bridge over Beadon Brook. The trail beared right and into Netton Cleave Wood where Soapy was manning the superior Valentine's Day sweetie-stop. No plastic bags of sweets from the Poundshop here. A fine box of milk chocolates.....hmmm, lovely.
 
NIGHT FISHING (2011)
From here the trail ran a short way along Beardon Brook till a single plank footbridge took us onto the public footpath on the south side of the brook. Up and up we went through woodland following very clear and very close marks. Past Great Rock and a disused mine before dropping steeply down to a small lake where some anglers were doing a spot of night fishing.
 
At the bottom of the steep descent it was a right turn at Greatrock Farm and up a concrete road for 100 yards before turning left and following the footpath signs up a very steep track through woodland. At the top a traverse along the edge of an open field before joining the dead end of the lane that took us back to the Palk Arms. All very well laid with plenty of clear marks. Big thumbs up, well done Hares.
The Longs, meanwhile, had to contend with 2/3 Long/Short splits. The first was in Hennock and took us down a footpath to Warm Hill Farm and a check. Man-PIg, who thought he knew where he was, checked downhill. BONG! Wrong. Beefy checked up Warm Hill and came to a check at the first crossroads.
 
I reached the check to find Swinger, Well-Hopped and Ned waiting for a call. It was almost certainly straight on and up to Five Lanes. Wrong again. Broadshit returned from the right calling, "False trail". Then, in the opposite direction; this was Beefy calling. The trail was left and heading away from Hennock. Not a good sign.
 
SHAMEFACED?
A fairly long downhill to another check at a junction with a muddy track on the right hand side. This looked promising and it wasn't long before we heard Beefy calling "On-On". I'd never been up here before. It is, incredulously, classified as a road! It is called Shamefaced Lane (I wonder why?).
 
WETFART CALLS TIME
Sure enough, it exited at Five Lanes where we rejoined the Longs and the Walkers. Ascending the very wet Beacon Lane, it wasn't long before hashers came into sight. These would be the Walkers. We'd caught up with Wetfart who was suffering the interminable hill. "Shout when you reach the top Man-Pig", was Wetfart's plea to which I was happy to oblige. Next to be overtaken was Coldtits. Then Shitfaced. Just before arriving at Chericombehead we passed Zoot and Hotlips.
 
WETFART REVISITED
At Chericombehead, the Longs went left and then right at Shaptor Cross to arrive back at the Walkers/Short & Longs split at Chericombehead. I'd been pretty much on my own since the second check. No sight of Beefy in front of me or Swinger, Well-Hopped and Broadshit behind me. Hence it came as a welcome respite to catch up with Wetfart for the second time on the descent down Beadon Lane.
 
THE LAST TRAIL (1927)
A short while later and I caught up with Coldtits, again, and then Manopause and Erection just before the sweetie-stop. After a very nice chocolate, I carried on along the trail to find Melon-Picker guiding Hashers towards the footbridge. This was the last Hasher that I would see on trail until the pub. Just as well the trail was well marked.
 
THE DOWN-DOWNS
Thine RA Man-Pig welcomed everyone to the Palk Inn. The first item on the agenda was to thank the pub for opening as it has only just started reopening on Monday nights. Indeed, apart from the Hash there were only two punters at the bar. We, additionally, thanked the pub for the beer. Most hashers had, in fact, found something pink to wear in the pub. However, most hashers had not brought their better halves. Would we all be in the dog house when we got home?
 
TEAPOT'S TALL TALES
Without further ado, it was time to dish out the Awards. Wetfart had the Hashshit shirt. This he awarded to Teapot for compulsive lying. Teapot had made up stories about how good/ bad, hilly/flat, wet/dry the trail was when he hadn't done any of it! A note for Pinnochio and his long nose.
 
HORSE HEAD HAT HOMES IN ON CARROT-CRUNCHER
Next up was Man-Pig who had the Horse Head Hat to give away. Having seen nothing on trail apart from a mouse and a box of chocolates he had to think hard. It was almost a full moon and the road sections could easily be managed without the use of a torch. However, Beefy was observed taking his torch into the pub. Obviously he needs to improve his night vision by increasing Beta-Carotene in his diet. A note for the carrot-cruncher.
 
PUDDING & PIE FOR BIRTHDAY GIRL?
No more stories or, indeed, awards. But there was a birthday girl. It was Georgy Porgy's birthday the previous day. Obviously, "All the right notes. Not necessarily in the right order".
 
HARES COME DANCING
As Georgy had opted for water, this left two halves to be distributed. No-one more deserving than our two Hares for the evening. Before the down-downs there was some discussion about the missing Songmeister, as only he knows all the songs and all the words. Nevertheless, there was some recollection of, "I'm climbing up sunshine mountain...." followed by a passable attempt at Father Abraham with all the associated limb movements and "Oooohs" and "Ahhhrs".....interesting. Accordingly a note for "Come dancing".
 
Well done Hares. Good trail. Good marks and well done everyone who made the effort to find something pink.
 
* I couldn't resist..
 
NEXT WEEK
Smugglers Inn near Holcombe, between Teignmouth and Dawlish. Hare is Piltdown Man, no doubt assisted by Georgy Porgy.
 
On-On to next week.

MISMANAGEMENT UPDATED AGPU APRIL 4 2022

Grand Master Shitfaced mobile 07973 682201
Vice G M U Bend
On Sec Piltdown Man mobile 07773038756
R A Organiser Teapot
R A Manpig
R A Forrest Stump
R A Fallen Woman
Hash Cash Threesome
Hash Tax Pisswell
Trail Raiser Rambo
Haberdashery Zoot
Song Master Pork Torpedo
Social Sec Wet Johnny
Web /Web Master Bluebird

HASH SUBS 2022

This years membership, which is due now is £25 Alternatively you can pay £1 per week when attending. Samantha Zimbler Hash cash Threesum. On line payments Account name: TEIGN VALLEY HASH House Harriers Sort Code: 55-70-01 Account number: 69068186 Reference: your hash name

TVH3 HABERDASHERY LINK

JESSE'S DD FROM THE TALLY HO!

EXPLANATION OF ARCHIVE TVH3 SITES

GREATHASHGOD: A dedicated site (presently mothballed and serves as archive content only) with all TVH3 content. Mostly photos from each Monday's hash but also some video clips. Named after our Life President Pottsie.

PRECONDEROTOUS: Containing the entire archive of TVH3 of some 1000 vid clips and over 5000 posts and photos. Started on November 11th 2007, the site is active with Bluebird's personal content but the archive content is fascinating and preserved, well worth a look.

Fukarwi

Fukarwi

REARENDER

REARENDER

TEAPOT

TEAPOT

SOAPY

SOAPY

MOULDY DICK

MOULDY DICK

MELONPICKER

MELONPICKER

FALLEN WOMAN

FALLEN WOMAN

DORIS

DORIS

BROKEN MAN

BROKEN MAN

ARCHANGEL

ARCHANGEL

ABLE SEMEN

ABLE SEMEN

Previously unreleased clip - Vicky's naming from the Sea Trout

FOR TVH3 HABERDASHERY CONTACT ZOOT

FOR TVH3 HABERDASHERY CONTACT ZOOT

SC