Haytor Middle Car Park, Dartmoor
On-Down at Haytor Quarry
Run #1925
HARE: Slip-on-Me
Who
wuz there: Slip-o
n-Me, Shitfaced, Man-Pig, Arkangel, Hotlips, Zoot,
Beefy, Piltdown Man, Georgy Porgy, Smellie, Coldtits, Rambo, Well
Hopped, Big End, Well Hopped's Dad, Piddler, Wet Johnny, Warm Front,
Polyfella, Broadshit, Ablesemen, Ernie, Teapot. Non runners: Martin
& Threesum.
The Circle
An
absolutely beautiful and clear day welcomed us to Haytor Middle car
park. Smellie and Man-Pig commented on the beautiful view with Big End
reaffirming how fortunate we were with access to views like this on
trail.
Shitafced
said a few words about the weather, the view, and this weekend's
Ippletipple. It then transpired that Smellie had got her weekends
confused and would be attending the following weekend's Teignmouth beer
festival but not this weekend's Ippletipple.
This
was Slip-on-Me's virgin lay and she was quite anxious. She had already
swept up Plympton Hash's sawdust with a dustpan and brush. So as not to
confuse anyone, the trail had been laid in "red" sand.
When
we eventually got our eye in, the red sand proved to be more of a mud
colour. At least we now knew what to look for. Post run, drinks, and
nibbles were to be at the flooded quarry where a warm swim would await
those who dared.
The trail
PARADISE LOST by Pollyfella
The
hash gathered on the most beautiful of summer evenings at the middle
car park below the mighty Haytor rocks. The early arrivals took in the
epic view and picked out landmarks all the way down to The Ness at
Shaldon. The cars steadily pulled up. Then Warm Front appeared having
impressively cycled up to the moor and Beefy having equally impressively
run up from Widecombe.
The circle was called for our grandmaster to commence proceedings.
Our circle comprised of:
Able Semen, Archangel, Big End, Broadshit, Cold Tits, Georgy P Orgy, Hot Lips, Hunk of Beef, Manpig, Piddler, Piltdown Man, Pollyfella, Rambo, Shitfaced, Slip-on Me, Tea Pot, Well Hopped, Wet Johnny, Zoot, James, Norm, and Roger.
Able Semen, Archangel, Big End, Broadshit, Cold Tits, Georgy P Orgy, Hot Lips, Hunk of Beef, Manpig, Piddler, Piltdown Man, Pollyfella, Rambo, Shitfaced, Slip-on Me, Tea Pot, Well Hopped, Wet Johnny, Zoot, James, Norm, and Roger.
First
up was Piddler keen to know if a delegation of hashers would be heading
to the Ipple Tipple on 16th July but there were no definite takers. But
as the GM pointed out final decisions on such matters usually occur on
the day itself.
Next,
there was a discussion about the Teignmouth RFC beer festival to be
held over the weekend of Thursday 21st to Saturday 23rd July. This was
greeted with more enthusiasm with plans made for attending on Friday and
Saturday nights. Then Rambo confirmed that August dates were nearly
full and bookings for September were being taken.
Next,
it was the turn of hare for the evening, Slip on Me, who set out the
distances for the walker, short and long trails. There was a promise of a
beer stop and an explanation that the trail was laid in red sand which
was greeted with a murmur of intrigue. Could a sand trail be spotted out
on the moor?
The
on down was confirmed as the quarry and Slip on Me offered to drive
beer and belongings and even hashers down after the run.
Our
hare announced that all hashers were starting off heading down the hill
and off we went led by Warm Front through the bracken down to the lower
car park and on to the junction at the Moorland Hotel.
There
we scattered searching down the side roads and along the wall adjacent
to the hotel seeking our first glimpse of red sand.
After
several minutes of back and forth, Man Pig spotted the first sand blob
and called the “on on.” The trail led us down the lane heading towards
Ilsington.
About
half a mile later, we came upon a split for the walkers taking them
left. The longs and shorts carried on down the road until we reached an
arrow directing us right and down a pretty path to a stream.
Hashers
had the choice of either crossing on a bridge consisting of one long
thin rock raised above the water like a misplaced monolith from
Stonehenge or running across the stream.
On
we ran through pretty woodland until we reached a gate marked “Do Not
Enter – Private” which was covered in a forbidding barbed wire. Surely
it could not be that way?
Here there was a mini regroup with Man Pig, Big End, Polly Fella, Beefy, and Warm Front all searching for a sandy blob.
Big End bemoaned his colour blindness and explained that he was not going to be able to help us spot anything red tonight!
Then
in front of the gate, a blob was spotted and onwards we coursed. On we
ran down a track at the lowest point around the private land. Here our
pace was gentle with the sultry heat now playing its part.
Through
a gate and upwards we ran passing the isolated Bagg Tor House to our
left. Here our trail disappeared. We searched in all directions. Warm
Front and Big End went on straight up with Manpig exploring paths to the
left and Pollyfella down to Bagg Tor house.
We
decided the trail must be at the summit of Bagg Tor and so up we went
to be rewarded with the most epic panorama and - a sand blob!
With
all the earlier checking the group was now extended to include Smellie,
Broadsheet, and Ernie, he of the fastest milk cart fame. Ahead of us
lay Haytor and on we ran through another gate but, alas, this was to be
the last of the trail we could find. Paradise Lost indeed...
We ran up to the road below the Tor and down to the upper car park to observe the movements at the middle car park.
With
our GPS showing we were still below four miles, our group was unable to
resist running up to Haytor to take in the view. Warm Front ascended
the great rock and the rest of the group went around on the grass. Then
we descended to the on down location to see the quarry and admire the
water lilies and the plentiful tadpoles in its waters.
Then
it was back to the car park to gather our beers and clothes ready for
the on down. Heading back, we passed Able Semen, the first hasher who
was on her way up from the car park, and then we met Georgy P Orgy with
Piltdown Man.
As
Piltdown was carrying Smellie's beer and gear, she decided to stay up
at the on down site as the rest of the group returned to the car park.
There we found Threesome and partner sitting outside their camper
enjoying the last of their leisurely dinner from a fine vantage point
overlooking the views of the South Devon coast.
Here
too was Well Hopped and her father and another hasher (apologies for
not knowing your name). Back at the cars, we met Coldtits who explained
the shorts had found the beer stop. She offered packs of crisps to the
hungry hashers. Then over the far slopes facing Haytor emerged Rambo and
from the direction of the top car park, Archangel descended. The hash
was regrouping from all directions.
A
group of hashers including Well Hopped and Big End decided to take in
the sunset from the top of Haytor and off they went with their supplies.
Next to arrive at the car park was Slip on Me returning in a cloud of 4 x 4 dust.
She
explained that she had been waiting at the beer stop for the longs who
never arrived. The longs were all sorry to have missed the beer stop but
it could not be helped and they had still had a lovely run and taken in
stunning views. The hash was now dispersing in all directions.
Beefy
and Warm Front headed off on their energetic ways home. Slip on Me
kindly offered to drive hashers to the on down and a group enjoyed a
bumpy 4x4 ride to the quarry for a catch-up and refreshment with the
rest of the pack.
What a glorious night it was out hashing on Dartmoor in the shadows of Haytor.
A huge thank you to Slip on Me for all her hard work in arranging such a fabulous adventure.
The Down-Downs
Probably
didn't happen as only Piltdown-Man, Georgy Porgy, Smellie, Piddler,
Able Semen, Slip-On-Me, Rambo, Martin, and Threesum walked up to the
quarry for nibbles and drinks.
Next week
The
concluding chapter of the Dartmoor trilogy: Location: Ponsworthy; Hare -
Pisswell, possibly aided by Beefy. Full directions to be posted.
ON ON! Man-Pig
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