The Park Inn, Kingskerswell
Run No. 1960
HARES: Cheerio Beerio & Shitfaced
Who
wuz there: Cheerio Beerio, Shitfaced, Man-Pig, Bluebird, Arkangel,
Threesum, Martin (pub only), Soapy, Melonpicker, Beeflicker, Slip-on-Me,
Satnav, Ablesemen, Beefy, Pisswell, Piltdown Man, Georgy Porgy,
Smellie, Piddler, Coldtits, Big End, Well Hopped, Ned, Roger the
Dodger, Triple Jump, Strap-On, Strap Dancer, Piddler, U-Bend, Only Here
for the Beer (pub only) and visitors Dan (from Newcastle) and Reyna
(from London) and finally, very late in the day, Floss (pub only).
Circle
An
important announcement by Satnav. Teapot won't be running for a while
as he's had a pacemaker fitted! We all wish Teapot every success with
the operation and look forward to seeing him soon. Smellie is up to date
with the Hare-raising and no-one wants to compete for next year's
Scribe of the Year shirt so it was over to the Hares.
Shitfaced
first announced scoff: sausage, beans and chips at circa £3.50 "hands
up". The trail was going to be 6 for the Long (highly suspect), 3.5 for
the Short and 2.5 for the Walkers' potter. Shitfaced mentioned that he
was following Cheerio's instructions for the trail and Cheerio said
that she wouldn't be sweeping.
Trail
The
day's strong winds had receded and it was still quite warm; just a hint
of drizzle in the air. The trail proved to be somewhat of an enigma.
The Shorts appeared to be on the Longs. the Longs were off trail and
everyone ended up coming together about three times - irrespective of
what trail they were on.
The
trail took us all through the ginnel opposite the pub and onto Park
Road. Virtually all the pack took a right at at the first check only to
be called back by Cheerio. The trail actually went left and onto
Woodland Avenue before bearing right onto Coles lane and left down the
Newton Road towards Aller quarry.
At
the garage that sells camper vans, we came to the first split. The
Walkers' trail stayed on road up to Coffinswell whilst the Longs and the
Shorts took the track behind Romany Jones and ascended Yew Tree climb
(well, that's what it's called on Strava) up to Milber Lane and a
Long/Short split.
The
Longs committed themselves to going towards Milber. A long way towards
Milber with no sign of any marks. The Pig took the path up to the iron
age fort and was convinced he'd spotted a single mark. It must have
been bird poo but by this time we were at the edge of St Marychurch
Road near the reservoirs. Additionally, all of the other Longs had
caught up. This comprised the usual suspects of Beeflicker, Pisswell,
Big End and well Hopped. Visitor Dan was also establishing himself as a
FRB on his first ever hash. Strap-On and Smellie had also caught up
despite believing they were on the Short trail.
There
was nothing else for it. The best bet was to run up St Marychurch Road
and take the first right down Blackenway Lane. This would join up with
the Shorts at Milder lane which it did. Amazingly, we saw marks for
the first time in over a mile!
We
were now in Coffinswell, and it wasn't long before we came to another
Long/Short split. The Longs took a narrow wooded track that opens onto
open pasture in front of two newish post houses and then the footpath
that takes you onto Connybeare Lane and back into Coffinswell. The
Shorts beared right opposite the Linney and to the Walkers/Shorts split
that would take the Walkers back into Kingskerswell by the primary
school. A few yards further on and we encountered another Long/Short
split.
This
short loop should have had the Longs coming back onto Willowpark Lane
at its junction with Daccombe Mill Lane via the footpath that follows
Aller Brook at The Bothy. However, what was coming marching towards me
along the footpath? The Shorts! Despite being on the Longs, the Shorts
enjoyed this part of the trail because they encountered a large number
of toads!
The
trail then climbed Daccombe Mill Lane and back into Kingskerswell just
above the Lord Nelson pub. An arrow had all running down Southey Lane
before returning to the pub via the main road into Torquay.
Down-Downs
Talk
in the pub centred around the weekend's rugby (for those of who have
an interest in the odd shaped ball). In particular, England's complete
demolition by a hugely in form France.
Man-Pig
took on MC duties for the evening and welcomed visitors Dan and Reyna.
Additionally, we thanked the pub for the beer and the scoff.
"What did we think of the trail?" Moans and groans all round - par for the course.
Hashshit
Shirt: After being plagued throughout the run by the Bird - even though
he was always on the short trail and Soapy on the long, Soapy gave the
shirt to the birdbrained one who delighted in exposing himself. The
Harriets were not impressed. Despite his age, he is quite
well-preserved. Accordingly, a note for the formaldehyde one.
Horned
Hat: The best laid plans don't always go to plan. The Bird had espied
his missing Viking horned hat on Triple Jump and had decided he wanted
it back for a week or two.
He
courted Triple Jump with a pre-trail tango and then bought her a lemon
and lime fizzy water with a requested slice of lemon. He certainly
knows how to give a lady a fine time!
Triple
Jump was won over but an almighty spanner was thrown in the works when
Soapy - oblivious to the devious plan - awarded the Idiot with the
hashit shirt! RA Man-Pig, unaware of the subterfuge, was baffled.
However, the Bird wasn't going to get a second beer so it was a water
for him, much to his chagrin.
Turkish
wedding hat: Shitfaced gave this to U-Bend for getting quite excited
about Bluebird's exposure. What did he do wrong? He kept both hands
firmly in his pockets whilst smiling at the near naked bird. A note for
the nut tickler, if you please.
The
pub had been very generous with the Down-Downs, so there were plenty
of drinks left for the Hares which included a Smirnoff Ice for
Cheerio-Beerio.
One
half pint left to award. There were no stories but someone has a
birthday very close to Paddy's Day. All the right notes, not
necessarily in the right order, for Arkangel whose birthday fell on
Wednesday.
Next week
Next
week's Hash is at The Ferry Boat inn, Shaldon, for, weather
permitting, Bluebird and Man-Pig's "Fire Hash" or a derivation thereof.
Circle up in the Ness car park.
On-On to next week.
