A WARM WELCOME FROM TVH3

Welcome to the Teign Valley Hash House Harriers of glorious South Devon. You are guaranteed a warm welcome and a great hash experience. We are the 'Party Hash' and we run from pubs all over Torbay, Dartmoor and the Teign Valley every Monday evening at 7.15pm. Our trails are marked with flour, chalk or sawdust and take in woodland, streams, byways, bridle paths and rolling countryside. We cater for all abilities, you needn't worry about keeping up, a leisurely walk with others or a good paced run if you're fit - you choose. The run duration is anything from 30 minutes to an hour and the distance is normally between 3-6 miles depending on whether you decide to take a short or long trail. Your first run is free, so come along and give it a go! After the run hashers enjoy a drink and food in the pub. On many occasions, the pub will lay on a 'Hash Menu', food specially for hashers.

WHAT TO EXPECT AT YOUR FIRST HASH

Starts soon after 7:15 pm each Monday.
The Grandmaster will gather the hash together in a circle and welcome Virgins & Visitors to TVH3 and inform the group of pertinent news or upcoming events.
Hares will announce details or the trail, number of long and short splits and regroups.

Down-Downs - sometimes at the circle but usually in the pub after the run. Hashers and harriets (lady hashers) have a half pint and under age hashers have a soft drink or water. If you are driving, just ask the RA for water.

A Down-Down is a means of punishing, rewarding, or merely recognizing an individual for any action or behavior. Once awarded, the downdown must be drunk without pause, otherwise the RA may take action!

Individuals may be recognized for outstanding service, or for their status as a visitor or newcomer.

Down-Downs also serve as punishment for misdemeanours real, imagined, or blatantly made up.

Such transgressions may include: wearing new shoes, pointing with a finger, or the use of real names rather than hash names.

Hash Names

The use of real names (nerd name) during an event is discouraged, and members are typically given a new "hash name," usually in deference to a particularly notorious escapade, a personality trait, or their physical appearance.

Members are named after attending the hash on several occasions or if something noteworthy occurs to prompt a naming.

Other hashers may share stories or observations about the individual, with the final name being chosen by general consensus from all suggestions put forward by the hash.

NEWCOMERS TO THE HASH
Completely new to hashing? Don't know what to expect? Worried, shy or nervous? You needn't be as all newcomers or virgins as they are known, will receive a warm welcome. When the hashers are called to make a circle - about 7:15 pm each Monday, the Grand Master will welcome all hashers and after various notices about forthcoming events etc are dealt with, he will ask if there are any visitors from other hashes or virgins present. You will be asked to come forward and be introduced to the hash. A tip to remember, don't wear new trainers as these are frowned upon by the RA (Religious Advisor) and will incur a sprinkling of flour over them. That's all there is to it and you can then step back and enjoy the run and the social get together after in the On Down (the pub). Whatever your pace, there are certain to be others who will keep you company along the trail. Walk, jog or run - it's up to you.
Hashing is all about making friends and having fun, so just turn up any Monday and have a go.

Pages (when clicked the item will appear at the bottom of the page - click home to return)

A CHARLTON HESTON AT THE TALLY HO!

Run #1783 Mon 25th Feb at The Tally Ho! Littlehempston, Totnes with Hares Coldtitz & Bobbiball

It was back to the charming Tally Ho! at Littlehempston that the TV bandwagon sallied to be regaled by new tenants Mike and 'Kickboxer' Kelly, not forgetting their adorable Basset hound Betty. Are you sitting comfortably? Then once more unto the breach, dear friends all..

Chariots of the TVH legion crammed into the compact CP of the former Bolton Arms* for what would subsequently be known as the Charlton Heston** hash, Harry. Oh Shirley yes, Dearly Oblivious, this EPIC in the making would give Ben-Hur and the Ten Commandments a run for their money. So, as Calvera*** would say, 'Read on' or was it 'ride' on? Never mind, back to the car park I say..

Famous faces familiar were espied in tantalising glimpses before being swallowed up again in the eerie swirling maelstrom of forty five assembled hashers.

And there was Beefy at last, he came back, a hasher like him. Big Raf back from a footballing shoulder injury; Ipplepenners Roxanne & young Harry****, Manopause, Erection and WJ; Forrest with his new, highly secret, supersonic ski prototype; virgins Tom, Mark, Bert (and returnee Ernie [sic] who drove the fastest milk cart in Tamar H); Poacher in repaired chariot; the National X country heroes Deep Throat and Grinder and, as befitting an EPIC, a supporting cast of dozens... Wait for it, it's Shirley showtime.

Procurator Piltdown demanded order and predictably had an Oscar themed question for the plebeians packed before him, Harry. Difficult to see what was occurring in the maddened throng, but eventually the director of the EPIC, one Mary Sturgess (yes, and possibly a distant relative of that director of epics aplenty, John Sturges) stepped up to the Roman oche accompanied by a bewheeled Bobby. Already an air of excitement prevailed and the crowd hushed in anticipation.. (I think it's going quite well so far SM Ellie, what do you think?)

The EPIC edict was proclaimed: FOUR TRAILS! A long, medium and short plus the now obligatory walkers' route (as fanatically supported by Teapot, Wet Fart, Only Here and other unnamed suspects) and the estimated distances elicited gasps from some - especially the Magnificent Seven Mile long HA! Also included was a Sherry and Cheese stop somewhere out there in the wilds, Winfield.
A prancing idiot could be discerned on the periphery of the crowd displaying his £140 Nike EPIC React Flyknit road cruising shoes to all and sundry - more on this and the EPIC fail of the Supersonic Ski foot later HA! I'm enjoying this rubbish now...

If he had only bothered to listen, the Pillock would have heard Bobby reveal the intricacies of the extra loop for the longs which a nameless buffoon had assisted in laying two hours previously..
The gates of the ancient stockade were flung open and a myriad array of dazzling head torches appeared at the entrance and first check.

Cunning indeed was the hares' design which flummoxed all before the longs surged out of the woods by the Pig & Whistle and across the main road, Berry Pomeroy bound.
Poacher/Cider led, pursued by a resurgent Beefy, Deep Throat and a t-shirt clad Nike EPIC cruising Bat. They were joined by serial FRB Whisperer, (didn't see him at the circle Cyril) Grinder and Forrest's buddy Tom. Out onto the road (becycled Bobby: 'How did you get here so quickly?) and downhill the Nike EPIC shoes kicked in (I get paid 10P every time I write that) taking the Bat to the front (yes, it was a race you fools) and prompting a 'Here we go!' from Deep Throat who, along with Grinder, Shirley wanted an easy time of it after Saturday's exertions (and beer celebrations afterwards).

All along, down along, out along lea coursed the merry longs and many twists and turns did they make as they inexorably closed with the ruins of Berry Pomeroy castle and the riddle of the loop..
Bobby: 'Don't ask questions Bluebird, just lay the loop down there, turn right onto the road, round the lake and back up to the castle. I'll meet you there.'

'Well, we suddenly came across the loop after already going round the lake from another direction and knowing we were now going down to the lake yet again, I halted Beefy, Manpig and Wet Johnny and warned that we were going round for a second lap. Seven minutes later, we arrived at the same point.' Aghast was the Bat: 'I'm NOT going down there AGAIN!' But Beefy had finally solved the riddle. 'Yes, we WILL go down there AGAIN but we'll turn left this time and that will let us escape this disaster you have got us into!' We had now been joined by Ernie, Bert and Sugar Puff (come to think about it, where did WJ and Manpig disappear to?) and you know what? Beefy was right and there was Coldtitz and Bobby, manning the Sherry & Cheese stall and asking where on earth we had been.

Now before I forget and I know you're dying to find out, Dearly Inquisitive, what had happened to our Hash Hero Forrest - he of the secret supersonic ski foot? We-ell, he covered about two miles before deciding that it just wasn't going to work and returned to change back to the old ski foot - four miles in the bag. But that wasn't the end of it as Forrest then set off again onto the trail and I still haven't found out how many miles he covered in the end but he did arrive back at the pub a long time after the DDs. Back to the drawing board for the supersonic ski.. Rebuilding the Bionic Forrest is taking more time than we thought.

I also heard tell of an alarming tale regarding Slip on Me. Details are scarce but apparently she had to be rescued after somehow taking the long trail! Quite understandably, Slip on Me didn't want to dwell on the scary details.

The Nike EPIC shoes were a rip roaring success - up to the time where their limitations were exposed in the mired depths of Gatcombe Brook just below the A381 ... sigh.

The Tally Ho! was snug and welcoming with good old Dartmoor Legend on tap along with Red Rock Dark Ness 4.5 ABV (excellent DD ale) and an ale I couldn't recall sampling (Archangel: 'You're slipping Bluebird.') Exeter Brewery's organic Avocet ale 3.9 ABV. Hash chilli was available and Mike and Kelly did us proud, didn't they just.

Coldtitz and EPIC Director Mary Sturgess, ably assisted by Bobby had scripted a classic trail which we enjoyed immensely and was well worth their efforts even though you both know that it was nearly the end of me!

TALLY HO! DD AWARDS
Poacher (Hashit shirt) to Bluebird for getting his prized new shoes ruined on the muddy trail.
Sugar Puff (should have been Horsey Horseface hat) to Camel Toe for forgetting to bring the Horse Head Hat from last week.
Bobbiball (prized Ceremonial Bat Hat) to Shitfaced for overtaking someone on Trail at last!
Hare Coldtitz for requesting lager from the pub as the best drink for the Hash.
Hare Bobbiball using his bike to lay the those confusing trail marks.

*Bolton Arms from 1850-1955
**An EPIC you fools
***You're not paying attention, the Mexican bandit from The Magnificent Seven.
****Roxanne's little lad (still trying to make sense of it all).

ON ON to next week and the Star at Liverton with Soapy & Melon Picker.

TVH3 HABERDASHERY LINK

NEW MISMANAGEMENT & CONTACT TELS.

Grand Master Shitfaced mobile 07973 682201
Vice G M Winfield mobile 07855355338
On Sec Piltdown Man mobile 07773038756
R A Organiser Teapot
R A Manpig
R A Forrest Stump
R A Fallen Woman
Hash Cash Threesome
Hash Tax Satnav
Trail Raiser Doris
Haberdashery Zoot
Song Master Pork Torpedo
Social Sec T. Humper
Spider /Web Bluebird
Life President Pottsie
Vice President K C

HASH SUBS

HASH SUBS £25 and for your assistance you can now use the BACS payment system to pay please.
Details as follows.... Hash Account number 69068186 Sort code 55-70-01 NOTE you must use your HASH NAME as a reference. Many thanks Three-Some & Satnav

JESSE'S DD FROM THE TALLY HO!

EXPLANATION OF ARCHIVE TVH3 SITES

GREATHASHGOD: A dedicated site (presently mothballed and serves as archive content only) with all TVH3 content. Mostly photos from each Monday's hash but also some video clips. Named after our Life President Pottsie.

PRECONDEROTOUS: Containing the entire archive of TVH3 of some 1000 vid clips and over 5000 posts and photos. Started on November 11th 2007, the site is active with Bluebird's personal content but the archive content is fascinating and preserved, well worth a look.

Fukarwi

Fukarwi

REARENDER

REARENDER

TEAPOT

TEAPOT

SOAPY

SOAPY

MOULDY DICK

MOULDY DICK

MELONPICKER

MELONPICKER

FALLEN WOMAN

FALLEN WOMAN

DORIS

DORIS

BROKEN MAN

BROKEN MAN

ARCHANGEL

ARCHANGEL

ABLE SEMEN

ABLE SEMEN

Previously unreleased clip - Vicky's naming from the Sea Trout

FOR TVH3 HABERDASHERY CONTACT ZOOT

FOR TVH3 HABERDASHERY CONTACT ZOOT

CTRL HTML MY REF.

Photobucket

SC