A WARM WELCOME FROM TVH3

Welcome to the Teign Valley Hash House Harriers of glorious South Devon. You are guaranteed a warm welcome and a great hash experience. We are the 'Party Hash' and we run from pubs all over Torbay, Dartmoor and the Teign Valley every Monday evening at 7.15pm. Our trails are marked with flour, chalk or sawdust and take in woodland, streams, byways, bridle paths and rolling countryside. We cater for all abilities, you needn't worry about keeping up, a leisurely walk with others or a good paced run if you're fit - you choose. The run duration is anything from 30 minutes to an hour and the distance is normally between 3-6 miles depending on whether you decide to take a short or long trail. Your first run is free, so come along and give it a go! After the run hashers enjoy a drink and food in the pub. On many occasions, the pub will lay on a 'Hash Menu', food specially for hashers.

WHAT TO EXPECT AT YOUR FIRST HASH

Starts soon after 7:15 pm each Monday.
The Grandmaster will gather the hash together in a circle and welcome Virgins & Visitors to TVH3 and inform the group of pertinent news or upcoming events.
Hares will announce details or the trail, number of long and short splits and regroups.

Down-Downs - sometimes at the circle but usually in the pub after the run. Hashers and harriets (lady hashers) have a half pint and under age hashers have a soft drink or water. If you are driving, just ask the RA for water.

A Down-Down is a means of punishing, rewarding, or merely recognizing an individual for any action or behavior. Once awarded, the downdown must be drunk without pause, otherwise the RA may take action!

Individuals may be recognized for outstanding service, or for their status as a visitor or newcomer.

Down-Downs also serve as punishment for misdemeanours real, imagined, or blatantly made up.

Such transgressions may include: wearing new shoes, pointing with a finger, or the use of real names rather than hash names.

Hash Names

The use of real names (nerd name) during an event is discouraged, and members are typically given a new "hash name," usually in deference to a particularly notorious escapade, a personality trait, or their physical appearance.

Members are named after attending the hash on several occasions or if something noteworthy occurs to prompt a naming.

Other hashers may share stories or observations about the individual, with the final name being chosen by general consensus from all suggestions put forward by the hash.

NEWCOMERS TO THE HASH
Completely new to hashing? Don't know what to expect? Worried, shy or nervous? You needn't be as all newcomers or virgins as they are known, will receive a warm welcome. When the hashers are called to make a circle - about 7:15 pm each Monday, the Grand Master will welcome all hashers and after various notices about forthcoming events etc are dealt with, he will ask if there are any visitors from other hashes or virgins present. You will be asked to come forward and be introduced to the hash. A tip to remember, don't wear new trainers as these are frowned upon by the RA (Religious Advisor) and will incur a sprinkling of flour over them. That's all there is to it and you can then step back and enjoy the run and the social get together after in the On Down (the pub). Whatever your pace, there are certain to be others who will keep you company along the trail. Walk, jog or run - it's up to you.
Hashing is all about making friends and having fun, so just turn up any Monday and have a go.

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A SAD STORY, CONVERTED TO REGGAE & AN OUTRAGEOUS BLEACHED PERM

#1834 Monday 17th February from the King's Arms at Kingsteignton with Fishbait & Small Fry
 
A fair to middlin' turnout from the King's Arms car park but at least it wasn't raining:
 
GM Shitfaced, I-Poo'd, Teapot, Piltdown, Georgie, Check Mate, Big End, Well Hopped, Ollie, Ellie, Fukarwi came back at last, Manpig, Wet Johnny, Erection, Manopause, Fishbait, Small Fry, Knotty, Soapy, Palmolive, Allo Vera, Wash 'n ' Go, Poles Piddler, Coldtits, Only Here, Dog End, McMuffin Weeny Whopper, Mouldy, Popeye, 69, Able, Hotlips, Zoot, BroadS, Doris, 3Sum, SatNav, Forrest, Pisswell and BB 41 all told with Melon Picker and Bobby making the pub later.
 
However, I really don't want to discuss the weather after Saturday's near death experience, but after witnessing the deluge decided that the trail shoes would be wisest and promptly left them on the draining board... sigh. So only had the one pair of road shoes to go out and play in.
 
The pub CP was soon rammed to capacity with latecomers in Ever Decreasing Circles Desperately Seeking (Susan) a space.
 
Fishbait and Small Fry arrived just before the circle with the glad tidings: A long, a short, a walkers' with one L/S split and a SS and, as no-one wanted to call the 'off' I legged it stage left from the tunnel of fear.
 
Abandoning after only a mile the previous week, I couldn't help thinking that a similar fate awaited early on, but with growing confidence, there was little sign of the injury and working on the adage 'you're only young once' I had agogo..
 
Up to the church and the longs began to form up. Wet Johnny was cruising in the van (vanguard you fools not a van van) baby and that rascal Popeye must have felt lucky as he was bang there with a neon FRB flashing on his back. Manpig, without the weakener of an A-B was looking good and it was going pretty well I thought. How wrong I was though...
 
Flat and good footing as we cruised over the Town Quay Bridge with a strong sense of deja vu.
First mistaka occurred when WJ and the Bat missed the trail by the River Lemon and had to play catch up.
 
Not so much traction along the side of Whitelake and the lonesome Bat emerged onto the Avenue roundabout to see Fishbait and the little fella waiting across the road - was this the mythical site of the SS Oh Dearly Where are My Berties?
 
It was here Oh Dearly I'm Going To Tell You a Sad Story that my destiny was seal-ed.
Being old and hard of hearing, I thought that Fishbait said 'At the flooded bridge go up into the woods' and armed with that info, I set off with hope in my heart plus a desire to get back to the longs.
Threading my back and there was Fukarwi and BroadS chatting away and further ahead Manopause, Erection, Forrest and Muttley HA!
 
Then loom-ed a flooded section and there seemed to be a turn up into the woods - so Shirley this was the place foretold? With a cry of triumph the Bat ascended to meet his destiny. At the summit, an awful vista unfolded... A taunting cry 'ON ON' came from WJ on the OTHER side of a Stalag style perimeter fence. 'Where are the marks?' did cry Manopause and the wiser headed ones turned.
 
However Trevor, the Bat was sticking to the plan - 'I swear I can get through!' and down to the seven foot razor-tipped fence he plunged. Skirting the fence it looked like it was only going to work but then a wall of brambles barred the way. No way out, no way out* and the expletive echoed for miles..
Guffaws aplenty from the other side and that was that. Whatamistakatomaka...
 
Then the Hash gods did frown and the heavens opened with the everlasting and inevitable downpour and my right calf muscle went into spasm. It was good to be alive.
 
But there's always a game to play on any hash and there were other hashers following. Deciding to go long were Well Hopped and little Ollie who was preparing for an upcoming 10k run. Only ten years old, the little lad was game as a pebble and wanted to make 5 miles on the run. Loitering outside the King's Arms, Piltdown watched in bewilderment as the trio of hashers went up and down the road past him three times to get the 5 mile readout.
 
An excellent run Fishbait and Small Fry and I can see the funny side of my detour now.
 
The King's Arms was packed with footie followers and the DDs were commenced at the half time interval in case some were displeased. Only there for the beer Bobby was spotted sporting a bleached perm and was swiftly summoned forward for the outrage. The sarnies and chips were plentiful and after Forrest had bought me a pint of Otter Reggae 4.0 abv I was converted from the Legend for the duration.
 
Did we have fun? Shirley yes, thanks Fishbait & Small Fry.
 
* The Producers 1967
 
DOWNDOWNS & AWARDS
SMALL FRY (White Bat Hat) for his efforts laying the trail
BLUEBIRD possibly for going off trail
MANOPAUSE for comments about Able's sex potions
BOBBY WOLL for his white perm
POPEYE has his 50 run badge at last
 
ON ON to next week from Newtons Free House. Birthday Hash Highweek Rd, Newton Abbot TQ12 1TP Circle 7:15 with Hare Wigwam, for his 69th Birthday Celebration.

HASH SUBS

HASH SUBS £25 and for your assistance you can now use the BACS payment system to pay please.
Details as follows.... Hash Account number 69068186 Sort code 55-70-01 NOTE you must use your HASH NAME as a reference. Many thanks Three-Some & Satnav

TVH3 HABERDASHERY LINK

NEW MISMANAGEMENT & CONTACT TELS.

Grand Master Shitfaced mobile 07973 682201
Vice G M Winfield mobile 07855355338
On Sec Piltdown Man mobile 07773038756
R A Organiser Teapot
R A Manpig
R A Forrest Stump
R A Fallen Woman
Hash Cash Threesome
Hash Tax Satnav
Trail Raiser Doris
Haberdashery Zoot
Song Master Pork Torpedo
Social Sec T. Humper
Spider /Web Bluebird
Life President Pottsie
Vice President K C sadly not with us

JESSE'S DD FROM THE TALLY HO!

EXPLANATION OF ARCHIVE TVH3 SITES

GREATHASHGOD: A dedicated site (presently mothballed and serves as archive content only) with all TVH3 content. Mostly photos from each Monday's hash but also some video clips. Named after our Life President Pottsie.

PRECONDEROTOUS: Containing the entire archive of TVH3 of some 1000 vid clips and over 5000 posts and photos. Started on November 11th 2007, the site is active with Bluebird's personal content but the archive content is fascinating and preserved, well worth a look.

Fukarwi

Fukarwi

REARENDER

REARENDER

TEAPOT

TEAPOT

SOAPY

SOAPY

MOULDY DICK

MOULDY DICK

MELONPICKER

MELONPICKER

FALLEN WOMAN

FALLEN WOMAN

DORIS

DORIS

BROKEN MAN

BROKEN MAN

ARCHANGEL

ARCHANGEL

ABLE SEMEN

ABLE SEMEN

Previously unreleased clip - Vicky's naming from the Sea Trout

FOR TVH3 HABERDASHERY CONTACT ZOOT

FOR TVH3 HABERDASHERY CONTACT ZOOT

CTRL HTML MY REF.

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